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He shook his head。 〃I have been a very foolish man； Rachel； I have been far from the bestest man in the world。 If only I had been wiser before； and remembered the things I was taught； my true duty； the reason I became a wizard in the first place； maybe I wouldn't have to ask you to do this。 But just as this is the most important thing you will ever do； it is also the most important thing I will ever do。 We must not fail； Rachel。 You must not。 No matter what happens； you must not let anyone stop you。 Not anyone。〃
He put a finger on each side of her forehead and she felt a safe feeling in her head。 She knew she would be able to do it and she would never have to do as the Princess said again。 She would be free。 Giller suddenly pulled his fingers away。
〃Someone es；〃 he whispered。 He kissed her head real quick。 〃Good spirits protect you； Rachel。〃
He stood up and put his back to the wall； behind the door。 He slipped the loaf of bread into his robes； and put his finger over his lips。 The door opened； and Rachel jumped to her feet。 It was Princess Violet。 Rachel curtsied： When she came back up； the Princess slapped her； then laughed。 Rachel looked down at the ground； and while she rubbed her cheek； holding back the tears； she saw a piece of bread between Princess Violet's feet。 She took a quick glance at Giller； who stood pressed against the wall behind the door。 His eyes went to the bread。 Quieter than a cat； he bent down and snatched up the bread； put it in his mouth； then slipped out the door behind Princess Violet's back without her ever seeing him。
…＋
Kahlan held her arms out to him； hands made into fists； the insides of her wrists pressed together； waiting for him to bind them with the rope。 Her unblinking eyes stared off at nothing。 She had said she wasn't tired； but Richard surely was…his head pounded so hard it made him feel sick…so she was going to take the first watch。 What good her watch was； the way she stared blankly； he didn't know。
He held the rope taut between his shaking fist； his mind feeling the last of' his hope finally abandoning him。 Nothing was changing； nothing was getting any better； as he had hoped； it was one long endless battle with her…she wanting to die； he trying constantly to prevent it。
〃I can't do this anymore；〃 he whispered； looking down at her wrists in the light of the small fire。 〃Kahlan； you may be the one who wishes to die； but it is me you are killing。〃
Her green eyes came up to his； the firelight flickered in them。 〃Then let me go； Richard。 Please； if you care at all for me； then show it。 Let me go。〃
He lowered the rope and let it drop。 With trembling hands； he slowly pulled her knife from his belt； and looked at it for a minute in the palm of his hand。 The glint of the blade was blurred in his vision。 He clenched the handle tightly in his fist and jammed the knife in the sheath at her belt。
〃You win。 Get out of here。 Get out of my sight。〃
〃Richard 。 。 。
〃I said get out of here！〃 He pointed back the way they had e。 〃Go back and let the gars do the job。 You may botch it with that knife！ I'd hate to think you slipped and didn't finish it properly。 I'd hate to think that after all this； you might not be dead。〃
He turned his back to her and sat on a windfall spruce that lay in front of the fire。 She stood watching him in silence； then moved off a few paces。
〃Richard 。 。 。 after all we have been through together； I don't want it to be finished like this。〃
〃I don't care what you want。 You have forfeited that right。〃 He struggled to make the words e out。 〃Get out of my sight。〃
Kahlan nodded； and looked down at the ground。 Richard leaned over； elbows on his knees； his face in his shaking hands。 He thought he might throw up。
〃Richard；〃 she said in a soft voice； 〃when this is all ended； I hope you can think well of me； remember me more fondly than you do right now。〃 That was it。 He came over the log with a boost of one boot on top。 In a blink he had her shirt in his fists。
〃I will only remember you for what you are！ A traitor！ A traitor to all those who have died； all those who will die！〃 Her eyes were wide as she tried to back away from him； but he held her with a vengeance。 〃A traitor to all the wizards who have given their lives； to Shar； to Siddin and all the Mud People who were killed！ A traitor to your sister！〃
〃That's not true 。 。 。 。〃
〃A traitor to all those and more！ If I fail and Rahl wins； we will all have you to thank； and so will Darken Rahl。 It is you who aids him！〃
〃I do this to help you！ You heard what Shota said！〃 She was getting angry now； too。
〃That won't work。 Not for me。 Yes； I heard what Shota said。 She said that both Zedd and you would turn against me somehow。 She did not say you both would be wrong！〃
〃What do you mean 。 。 。〃
〃This is not a quest for me！ It's to stop Rahl！ How do you know that once we have the box it might not be me who would deliver it to him？ What if it's me who would betray us； and the only chance to keep the box from Rahl is for you and Zedd to stop me？〃
〃That doesn't make any sense。〃
〃Does it make any more sense that both you and Zedd would try to kill me？ That would require two to be wrong； this would require only one。 It's just the stupid riddle of a witch woman！ You're letting yourself die for a stupid riddle！ We can't know how the future will e about。 We can't know the meaning of what she said； how it will be true！ Or if。 Not until it happens！ Only then can we know what it means； and deal with it。〃
〃I only know I cannot allow myself to live to carry out the prophecy。 You are the thread that weaves this struggle together。〃
〃And thread can't get there without the needle！ You're my needle。 Without you I wouldn't have gotten this far。 At every turn； 1 needed you。 Today； at the inverted fork； I would have chosen wrong without you。 You know the Queen； I don't。 Even if I manage to get the box without you； what then？ Where will I go？ I don't know the Midlands。 Where will I go； Kahlan； tell me？ How will I know where it's safe？ I could walk right into Rahl's hands； carry the box right to him。〃
〃Shota said you are the only one with a chance。 Without you all is lost。 Not me。 You。 She said that if I live 。 。 。 Richard； I can't allow that。 I won't。〃
〃You are a traitor to us；〃 he whispered viciously。
She shook her head slowly。 〃Despite what you think； Richard； I do this for you。〃
Richard screamed and threw her backward as hard as he could。 She fell to the ground on her back。 He came and stood above her； glaring down； dust rising around his boots。
〃Don't you dare say that！〃 he yelled； both hands in fists。 〃You do this for yourself； because you haven't got the stomach for what victory entails！ Don't you dare to say you do this for me！〃
She came to her feet； keeping her eyes on him。 〃I would give almost anything； Richard； for you not to remember me in this way。 But what I do； I do because I must。 For you。 For you to have a chance。 I have sworn to protect the Seeker with my life。 The payment has e due。〃 Tears ran down her face； throu