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the surprising adventures of baron munchausen-第20章

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ty among the Lunarians have an inclination to see what's going forward among the common people; they stay at home; /i。e。/; the body stays at home; and sends the head only; which is suffered to be present /incog。/; and return at pleasure with an account of what has passed。

The stones of their grapes are exactly like hail; and I am perfectly satisfied that when a storm or high wind in the moon shakes their vines; and breaks the grapes from the stalks; the stones fall down and form our hail showers。 I would advise those who are of my opinion to save a quantity of these stones when it hails next; and make Lunarian wine。 It is a common beverage at St。 Luke's。 Some material circumstances I had nearly omitted。 They put their bellies to the same use as we do a sack; and throw whatever they have occasion for into it; for they can shut and open it again when they please; as they do their stomachs; they are not troubled with bowels; liver; heart; or any other intestines; neither are they encumbered with clothes; nor is there any part of their bodies unseemly or indecent to exhibit。

Their eyes they can take in and out of their places when they please; and can see as well with them in their hand as in their head! and if by any accident they lose or damage one; they can borrow or purchase another; and see as clearly with it as their own。 Dealers in eyes are on that account very numerous in most parts of the moon; and in this article alone all the inhabitants are whimsical: sometimes green and sometimes yellow eyes are the fashion。 I know these things appear strange; but if the shadow of a doubt can remain on any person's mind; I say; let him take a voyage there himself; and then he will know I am a traveller of veracity。



                             CHAPTER XIX

  /The Baron crosses the Thames without the assistance of a bridge;   ship; boat; balloon; or even his own will: rouses himself after a   long nap; and destroys a monster who lived upon the destruction of   others。/

My first visit to England was about the beginning of the present king's reign。 I had occasion to go down to Wapping; to see some goods shipped; which I was sending to some friends at Hamburgh; after that business was over; I took the Tower Wharf in my way back。 Here I found the sun very powerful; and I was so much fatigued that I stepped into one of the cannon to compose me; where I fell fast asleep。 This was about noon: it was the fourth of June; exactly at one o'clock these cannon were all discharged in memory of the day。 They had been all charged that morning; and having no suspicion of my situation; I was shot over the houses on the opposite side of the river; into a farmer's yard; between Bermondsey and Deptford; where I fell upon a large hay…stack; without waking; and continued there in a sound sleep till hay became so extravagantly dear (which was about three months after); that the farmer found it his interest to send his whole stock to market: the stack I was reposing upon was the largest in the yard; containing above five hundred load; they began to cut that first。 I woke with the voices of the people who had ascended the ladders to begin at the top; and got up; totally ignorant of my situation: in attempting to run away I fell upon the farmer to whom the hay belonged; and broke his neck; yet received no injury myself。 I afterwards found; to my great consolation; that this fellow was a most detestable character; always keeping the produce of his grounds for extravagant markets。



                              CHAPTER XX

  /The Baron slips through the world: after paying a visit to Mount   Etna he finds himself in the South Sea; visits Vulcan in his   passage; gets on board a Dutchman; arrives at an island of cheese;   surrounded by a sea of milk; describes some very extraordinary   objectsLose their compass; their ship slips between the teeth of   a fish unknown in this part of the world; their difficulty in   escaping from thence; arrive in the Caspian SeaStarves a bear to   deathA few waistcoat anecdotesIn this chapter; which is the   longest; the Baron moralises upon the virtue of veracity。/

Mr。 Drybones' 〃Travels to Sicily;〃 which I had read with great pleasure; induced me to pay a visit to Mount Etna; my voyage to this place was not attended with any circumstances worth relating。 One morning early; three or four days after my arrival; I set out from a cottage where I had slept; within six miles of the foot of the mountain; determined to explore the internal parts; if I perished in the attempt。 After three hours' hard labour I found myself at the top; it was then; and had been for upwards of three weeks; raging: its appearance in this state has been so frequently noticed by different travellers; that I will not tire you with descriptions of objects you are already acquainted with。 I walked round the edge of the crater; which appeared to be fifty times at least as capacious as the Devil's Punch…Bowl near Petersfield; on the Portsmouth Road; but not so broad at the bottom; as in that part it resembles the contracted part of a funnel more than a punch…bowl。 At last; having made up my mind; in I sprang feet foremost; I soon found myself in a warm berth; and my body bruised and burnt in various parts by the red…hot cinders; which; by their violent ascent; opposed my descent: however; my weight soon brought me to the bottom; where I found myself in the midst of noise and clamour; mixed with the most horrid imprecations; after recovering my senses; and feeling a reduction of my pain; I began to look about me。 Guess; gentlemen; my astonishment; when I found myself in the company of Vulcan and his Cyclops; who had been quarrelling; for the three weeks before mentioned; about the observation of good order and due subordination; and which had occasioned such alarms for that space of time in the world above。 However; my arrival restored peace to the whole society; and Vulcan himself did me the honour of applying plasters to my wounds; which healed them immediately; he also placed refreshments before me; particularly nectar; and other rich wines; such as the gods and goddesses only aspire to。 After this repast was over Vulcan ordered Venus to show me every indulgence which my situation required。 To describe the apartment; and the couch on which I reposed; is totally impossible; therefore I will not attempt it; let it suffice to say; it exceeds the power of language to do it justice; or speak of that kind…hearted goddess in any terms equal to her merit。

Vulcan gave me a very concise account of Mount Etna: he said it was nothing more than an accumulation of ashes thrown from his forge; that he was frequently obliged to chastise his people; at whom; in his passion; he made it a practice to throw red…hot coals at home; which they often parried with great dexterity; and then threw them up into the world to place them out of his reach; for they never attempted to assault him in return by throwing them back again。 〃Our quarrels;〃 added he; 〃last sometimes three or four months; and these appearances of coals or cinders in the world are what I find you mortals call eruptions。〃 Mount Vesuvius; he assured me; was another of his shops; to which he had a 
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