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； to 〃bestow some of my tediousness upon you；〃 but you were gone from home。 Everything went on well as to the law business； and as it approached to a conclusion； I wrote to my good friend P to go to M； who had married her sister； and ask him if it would be worth my while to make her a formal offer； as soon as I was free； as； with the least encouragement； I was ready to throw myself at her feet； and to know； in case of refusal； whether I might go back there and be treated as an old friend。 Not a word of answer could be got from her on either point； notwithstanding every importunity and intreaty； but it was the opinion of M that I might go and try my fortune。 I did so with joy； with something like confidence。 I thought her giving no positive answer implied a chance； at least； of the reversion of her favour； in case I behaved well。 All was false； hollow； insidious。 The first night after I got home； I slept on down。 In Scotland； the flint had been my pillow。 But now I slept under the same roof with her。 What softness； what balmy repose in the very thought！ I saw her that same day and shook hands with her； and told her how glad I was to see her； and she was kind and comfortable； though still cold and distant。 Her manner was altered from what it was the last time。 She still absented herself from the room； but was mild and affable when she did come。 She was pale； dejected； evidently uneasy about something； and had been ill。 I thought it was perhaps her reluctance to yield to my wishes； her pity for what I suffered； and that in the struggle between both； she did not know what to do。 How I worshipped her at these moments！ We had a long interview the third day； and I thought all was doing well。 I found her sitting at work in the window…seat of the front parlour； and on my asking if I might come in； she made no objection。 I sat down by her； she let me take her hand； I talked to her of indifferent things； and of old times。 I asked her if she would put some new frills on my shirts？…〃With the greatest pleasure。〃 If she could get THE LITTLE IMAGE mended？ 〃It was broken in three pieces； and the sword was gone； but she would try。〃 I then asked her to make up a plaid silk which I had given her in the winter； and which she said would make a pretty summer gown。 I so longed to see her in it！〃She had little time to spare； but perhaps might！〃 Think what I felt； talking peaceably； kindly； tenderly with my love；not passionately； not violently。 I tried to take pattern by her patient meekness； as I thought it； and to subdue my desires to her will。 I then sued to her； but respectfully； to be admitted to her friendshipshe must know I was as true a friend as ever woman hador if there was a bar to our intimacy from a dearer attachment； to let me know it frankly； as I shewed her all my heart。 She drew out her handkerchief and wiped her eyes 〃of tears which sacred pity had engendered there。〃 Was it so or not？ I cannot tell。 But so she stood （while I pleaded my cause to her with all the earnestness； and fondness in the world） with the tears trickling from her eye…lashes； her head stooping； her attitude fixed； with the finest expression that ever was seen of mixed regret； pity； and stubborn resolution； but without speaking a word； without altering a feature。 It was like a petrifaction of a human face in the softest moment of passion。 〃Ah！〃 I said； 〃how you look！ I have prayed again and again while I was away from you； in the agony of my spirit； that I might but live to see you look so again； and then breathe my last！〃 I intreated her to give me some explanation。 In vain！ At length she said she must go； and disappeared like a spirit。 That week she did all the little trifling favours I had asked of her。 The frills were put on； and she sent up to know if I wanted any more done。 She got the Buonaparte mended。 This was like healing old wounds indeed！ How？ As follows； for thereby hangs the conclusion of my tale。 Listen。
I had sent a message one evening to speak to her about some special affairs of the house； and received no answer。 I waited an hour expecting her； and then went out in great vexation at my disappointment。 I complained to her mother a day or two after； saying I thought it so unlike Sarah's usual propriety of behaviour； that she must mean it as a mark of disrespect。 Mrs。 L said； 〃La！ Sir； you're always fancying things。 Why； she was dressing to go out； and she was only going to get the little image you're both so fond of mended； and it's to be done this evening。 She has been to two or three places to see about it； before she could get anyone to undertake it。〃 My heart； my poor fond heart； almost melted within me at this news。 I answered； 〃Ah！ Madam； that's always the way with the dear creature。 I am finding fault with her and thinking the hardest things of her； and at that very time she's doing something to shew the most delicate attention； and that she has no greater satisfaction than in gratifying my wishes！〃 On this we had some farther talk； and I took nearly the whole of the lodgings at a hundred guineas a year； that （as I said） she might have a little leisure to sit at her needle of an evening； or to read if she chose； or to walk out when it was fine。 She was not in good health； and it would do her good to be less confined。 I would be the drudge and she should no longer be the slave。 I asked nothing in return。 To see her happy； to make her so； was to be so myself。This was agreed to。 I went over to Blackheath that evening； delighted as I could be after all I had suffered； and lay the whole of the next morning on the heath under the open sky； dreaming of my earthly Goddess。 This was Sunday。 That evening I returned； for I could hardly bear to be for a moment out of the house where she was； and the next morning she tapped at the doorit was openedit was sheshe hesitated and then came forward： she had got the little image in her hand； I took it； and blest her from my heart。 She said 〃They had been obliged to put some new pieces to it。〃 I said 〃I didn't care how it was done； so that I had it restored to me safe； and by her。〃 I thanked her and begged to shake hands with her。 She did so； and as I held the only hand in the world that I never wished to let go； I looked up in her face； and said 〃Have pity on me； have pity on me； and save me if you can！〃 Not a word of answer； but she looked full in my eyes； as much as to say； 〃Well； I'll think of it； and if I can； I will save you！〃 We talked about the expense of repairing the figure。 〃Was the man waiting？〃〃No； she had fetched it on Saturday evening。〃 I said I'd give her the money in the course of the day； and then shook hands with her again in token of reconciliation； and she went waving out of the room； but at the door turned round and looked full at me； as she did the first time she beguiled me of my heart。 This was the last。
All that day I longed to go down stairs to ask her and her mother to set out with me for Scotland on Wednesday； and on Saturday I would make her my wife。 Something withheld me。 In the evening； however； I could not rest without seeing her； and I said to her younger sister； 〃Betsey； if Sarah will come up now； I'll pay he