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morning； poor lad； and when he first came down kissed all the
family at breakfast！ The Doctor was greatly excited； as may
be supposed； about Lafaele's medicine。
TUESDAY。
All yesterday writing my mail by the hand of Belle； to save
my wrist。 This is a great invention； to which I shall stick；
if it can be managed。 We had some alarm about Paatalise； but
he slept well all night for a benediction。 This lunatic
asylum exercise has no attractions for any of us。
I don't know if I remembered to say how much pleased I was
with ACROSS THE PLAINS in every way； inside and out； and you
and me。 The critics seem to taste it； too； as well as could
be hoped； and I believe it will continue to bring me in a few
shillings a year for a while。 But such books pay only
indirectly。
To understand the full horror of the mad scene； and how well
my boys behaved； remember that THEY BELIEVED P。'S RAVINGS；
they KNEW that his dead family； thirty strong； crowded the
front verandah and called on him to come to the other world。
They KNEW that his dead brother had met him that afternoon in
the bush and struck him on both temples。 And remember！ we
are fighting the dead； and they had to go out again in the
black night； which is the dead man's empire。 Yet last
evening； when I thought P。 was going to repeat the
performance； I sent down for Lafaele； who had leave of
absence； and he and his wife came up about eight o'clock with
a lighted brand。 These are the things for which I have to
forgive my old cattle…man his manifold shortcomings； they are
heroic … so are the shortcomings； to be sure。
It came over me the other day suddenly that this diary of
mine to you would make good pickings after I am dead； and a
man could make some kind of a book out of it without much
trouble。 So； for God's sake； don't lose them； and they will
prove a piece of provision for my 'poor old family；' as
Simele calls it。
About my coming to Europe； I get more and more doubtful； and
rather incline to Ceylon again as place of meeting。 I am so
absurdly well here in the tropics； that it seems like
affectation。 Yet remember I have never once stood Sydney。
Anyway； I shall have the money for it all ahead； before I
think of such a thing。
We had a bowl of Punch on your birthday； which my incredible
mother somehow knew and remembered。
I sometimes sit and yearn for anything in the nature of an
income that would come in … mine has all got to be gone and
fished for with the immortal mind of man。 What I want is the
income that really comes in of itself while all you have to
do is just to blossom and exist and sit on chairs。 Think how
beautiful it would be not to have to mind the critics； and
not even the darkest of the crowd … Sidney Colvin。 I should
probably amuse myself with works that would make your hair
curl； if you had any left。
R。 L S。
CHAPTER XX
SATURDAY； 2ND JULY 1892。
THE character of my handwriting is explained； alas！ by
scrivener's cramp。 This also explains how long I have let
the paper lie plain。
1 P。 M。
I was busy copying David Balfour with my left hand … a most
laborious task … Fanny was down at the native house
superintending the floor； Lloyd down in Apia； and Belle in
her own house cleaning； when I heard the latter calling on my
name。 I ran out on the verandah； and there on the lawn
beheld my crazy boy with an axe in his hand and dressed out
in green ferns； dancing。 I ran downstairs and found all my
house boys on the back verandah； watching him through the
dining…room。 I asked what it meant？ … 'Dance belong his
place；' they said。 … 'I think this no time to dance；' said I。
'Has he done his work？' … 'No；' they told me； 'away bush all
morning。' But there they all stayed on the back verandah。 I
went on alone through the dining…room； and bade him stop。 He
did so； shouldered the axe； and began to walk away； but I
called him back； walked up to him； and took the axe out of
his unresisting hands。 The boy is in all things so good；
that I can scarce say I was afraid； only I felt it had to be
stopped ere he could work himself up by dancing to some
craziness。 Our house boys protested they were not afraid；
all I know is they were all watching him round the back door
and did not follow me till I had the axe。 As for the out
boys； who were working with Fanny in the native house； they
thought it a very bad business； and made no secret of their
fears。
WEDNESDAY； 6TH。
I have no account to give of my stewardship these days； and
there's a day more to account for than mere arithmetic would
tell you。 For we have had two Monday Fourths； to bring us at
last on the right side of the meridian； having hitherto been
an exception in the world and kept our private date。
Business has filled my hours sans intermission。
TUESDAY； 12TH
I am doing no work and my mind is in abeyance。 Fanny and
Belle are sewing…machining in the next room； I have been
pulling down their hair； and Fanny has been kicking me； and
now I am driven out。 Austin I have been chasing about the
verandah； now he has gone to his lessons； and I make believe
to write to you in despair。 But there is nothing in my mind；
I swim in mere vacancy； my head is like a rotten nut； I shall
soon have to begin to work again or I shall carry away some
part of the machinery。 I have got your insufficient letter；
for which I scorn to thank you。 I have had no review by
Gosse； none by Birrell； another time if I have a letter in
the TIMES； you might send me the text as well； also please
send me a cricket bat and a cake； and when I come home for
the holidays； I should like to have a pony。
I am； sir； your obedient servant；
JACOB TONSON。
P。S。 I am quite well； I hope you are quite well。 The world
is too much with us； and my mother bids me bind my hair and
lace my bodice blue。
CHAPTER XXI
MY DEAR COLVIN； … This is Friday night； the （I believe） 18th
or 20th August or September。 I shall probably regret to…
morrow having written you with my own hand like the Apostle
Paul。 But I am alone over here in the workman's house； where
I and Belle and Lloyd and Austin are pigging； the rest are at
cards in the main residence。 I have not joined them because
'belly belong me' has been kicking up； and I have just taken
15 drops of laudanum。
On Tuesday； the party set out … self in white cap； velvet
coat； cords and yellow half boots； Belle in a white kind of
suit and white cap to match mine； Lloyd in white clothes and
long yellow boots and a straw hat； Graham in khakis and
gaiters； Henry （my old overseer） in blue coat and black kilt；
and the great Lafaele with a big ship…bag on his saddle…bow。
We left the mail at the P。 O。； had lunch at