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went out and bought a black tie。 I am the oldest man in Tweedy's now
older by six years than Sam Collins； who comes next； so there is no
mistake about it。 Sam is looking for the place； I saw it in his eye
when he told me； and I expect he'll get it。 But I'm the oldest clerk
in Tweedy's。 Only God Almighty can alter that； and it's very
satisfactory to me。 I don't care about the money。 Sam Collins will be
stuck up over it； like enough； but he'll never write a hand like
Gabriel's； not if he lives to be a hundred； and he knows it； and knows
I'll be there to remind him of it。 Gabriel's was a beautiful fistso
small； too； if he chose。 Why； once； in his spare hours； he wrote out
all the Psalms； with the headings； on one side of a folio sheet； and
had it framed and hung up in his parlour； out at Shepherd's Bush。 He
died in the nightoh yes； quite easily。 He was down at the office all
yesterday； and spoke to me as brisk as a bird。 They found him dead in
his bed this morning。
〃I seem cut up about it？ Well； not exactly。 Ah； you noticed that I
refused my chop to…day。 Bless your soul； that's not on Gabriel's
account。 I am well on in years； and I suppose it would be natural of
me to pity old men； and expect pity。 But I can't； no； /it's only the
young that I pity/。 If you /must/ know； I didn't take the chop to…day
because I haven't the money in my pocket to pay for it。 You see； there
was this black tie that I gave eighteenpence for； but something else
happened this morning that I'll tell you about。
〃I came down in a 'bus； as usual。 You remember what muggy weather it
was up to ten o'clockthough you wouldn't think it； to feel the heat
now。 Well； the 'bus was packed； inside and out。 At least； there was
just room for one more inside when we pulled up by Charing Cross； and
there he got ina boy with a stick and a bundle in a blue
handkerchief。
〃He wasn't more than thirteen； bound for the docks； you could tell at
a glance； and by the way he looked about you could tell as easily that
in stepping outside Charing Cross station he'd set foot on London
stones for the first time。 God knows how it struck himthe slush and
drizzle； the ugly shop…fronts； the horses slipping in the brown mud；
the crowd on the pavement pushing him this side and that。 The poor
little chap was standing in the middle of it with dazed eyes； like a
hare's； when the 'bus pulled up。 His eyelids were pink and swollen；
but he wasn't crying； though he wanted to。 Instead； he gave a gulp as
he came on board with stick and bundle； and tried to look brave as a
lion。
〃I'd have given worlds to speak to him； but I couldn't。 On my word；
sir； I should have cried。 It wasn't so much the little chap's look。
But to the knot of his bundle there was tied a bunch of cottage
flowers；sweet…williams； boy's…love； and a rose or two；and the
sight and smell of them in that stuffy omnibus were like tears on
thirsty eyelids。 It's the young that I pity； sir。 For Gabriel； in his
bed up at Shepherd's Bush； there's no more to be said； as far as I can
see； and as for me； I'm the oldest clerk in Tweedy's； which is very
satisfactory。 It's the young faces； set toward the road along which we
have travelled； that trouble me。 Sometimes； sir； I lie awake in my
lodgings and listen； and the whole of this London seems filled with
the sound of children's feet running； and I can sob aloud。 You may say
that it is only selfishness； and what I really pity is my own boyhood。
I dare say you're right。 It's certain that； as I kept glancing at the
boy and his sea kit and his bunch of flowers； my mind went back to the
January morning； sixty…five years back； when the coach took me off for
the first time from the village where I was born to a London charity…
school。 I was worse off than the boy in the omnibus； for I had just
lost father and mother。 Yet it was the sticks and stones and flower…
beds that I mostly thought of。 I went round and said good…bye to the
lilacs； and told them to be in flower by the time I came back。 I said
to the rose…bush； 'You must be as high as my window next May； you know
you only missed it by three inches last summer。' Then I went to the
cow…house； and kissed the cows； one by one。 They were to be sold by
auction the very next week； but I guessed nothing of it； and ordered
them not to forget me。 And last I looked at the swallows' nests under
the thatch；the last year's nests；and told myself that they would
be filled again when I returned。 I remembered this； and how I
stretched out my hands to the place from the coach…top； and how at
Reading； where we stopped； I spent the two shillings that I possessed
in a cocoanut and a bright clasp…knife； and how； when I opened it； the
nut was sour； and how I cried myself to sleep； and woke in London。
〃The young men in Tweedy's； though they respect my long standing
there； make fun of me at times because I never take a holiday in the
country。 Why； sir； /I dare not/。 I should wander back to my old
village； and Well； I know how it would be then。 I should find it
smaller and meaner； I should search about for the flowers and nests；
and listen for the music that I knew sixty…five years ago； and
remember； and they would not be discoverable。 Also every face would
stare at me； for all the faces I know are dead。 Then I should think I
had missed my way and come to the wrong place； or （worse） that no such
spot ever existed； and I have been cheating myself all these years；
that； in fact； I was mad all the while； and have no stable reason for
existingI； the oldest clerk in Tweedy's！ To be sure； there would be
my parents' headstones in the churchyard。 But what are they； if the
churchyard itself is changed？
〃As it is； with three hundred pounds per annum； and enough laid by to
keep him； if I fail； an old bachelor has no reason to grumble。 But the
sight of that little chap's nosegay； and the thought of the mother who
tied it there； made my heart swell as I fancy the earth must swell
when rain is coming。 His eyes filled once； and he brushed them under
the pretence of pulling his cap forward； and stole a glance round to
see if any one had noticed him。 The other passengers were busy with
their own thoughts； and I pretended to stare out of the window
opposite； but there was the drop； sure enough； on his hand as he laid
it on his lap again。
〃He was bound for the docks； and thence for the open sea； and I； that
was bound for Tweedy's only； had to get out at the top of Cheapside。 I
know the 'bus conductor；a very honest man；and； in getting out； I
slipped half a crown into his hand to give to the boy； with my
blessing； at his journey's end。 When I picture his face； sir； I wish I
had made it five shillings； and gone without a new tie and dinner
altogether。〃
THE HIRED BABY
BY
MARIE CORELLI
A dark； desolate December night； a night that clung to the metropolis
like a wet black shroud； a night in which the heavy； low…hanging
vapours melted