按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
Perhaps I have sometimes irritated you by the comparisons you may have
made between these cares； these thoughts； and those I gave to you。 I
have had；〃 she said； in a sinking voice； 〃a deep friendship； which no
one； not even he who has been its object； has fully known。 Though I
have continued virtuous according to all human laws； though I have
been a irreproachable wife to you； still other thoughts； voluntary or
involuntary； have often crossed my mind and； in this hour； I fear I
have welcomed them too warmly。 But as I have tenderly loved you； and
continued to be your submissive wife； and as the clouds passing
beneath the sky do not alter its purity； I now pray for your blessing
with a clean heart。 I shall die without one bitter thought if I can
hear from your lips a tender word for your Blanche； for the mother of
your children；if I know that you forgive her those things for which
she did not forgive herself till reassured by the great tribunal which
pardons all。〃
〃Blanche； Blanche！〃 cried the broken man； shedding tears upon his
wife's head； 〃Would you kill me？〃 He raised her with a strength
unusual to him； kissed her solemnly on the forehead； and thus holding
her continued： 〃Have I no forgiveness to ask of you？ Have I never been
harsh？ Are you not making too much of your girlish scruples？〃
〃Perhaps；〃 she said。 〃But； dear friend； indulge the weakness of a
dying woman； tranquillize my mind。 When you reach this hour you will
remember that I left you with a blessing。 Will you grant me permission
to leave to our friend now here that pledge of my affection？〃 she
continued； showing a letter that was on the mantelshelf。 〃He is now my
adopted son； and that is all。 The heart； dear friend； makes its
bequests； my last wishes impose a sacred duty on that dear Felix。 I
think I do not put too great a burden on him； grant that I do not ask
too much of you in desiring to leave him these last words。 You see； I
am always a woman；〃 she said； bending her head with mournful
sweetness； 〃after obtaining pardon I ask a giftRead this；〃 she
added； giving me the letter； 〃but not until after my death。〃
The count saw her color change： he lifted her and carried her himself
to the bed； where we all surrounded her。
〃Felix；〃 she said； 〃I may have done something wrong to you。 Often I
gave you pain by letting you hope for that I could not give you； but
see； it was that very courage of wife and mother that now enables me
to die forgiven of all。 You will forgive me too； you who have so often
blamed me； and whose injustice was so dear〃
The Abbe Birotteau laid a finger on his lips。 At that sign the dying
woman bowed her head； faintness overcame her； presently she waved her
hands as if summoning the clergy and her children and the servants to
her presence； and then； with an imploring gesture； she showed me the
desolate count and the children beside him。 The sight of that father；
the secret of whose insanity was known to us alone； now to be left
sole guardian of those delicate beings； brought mute entreaties to her
face； which fell upon my heart like sacred fire。 Before receiving
extreme unction she asked pardon of her servants if by a hasty word
she had sometimes hurt them； she asked their prayers and commended
each one； individually； to the count； she nobly confessed that during
the last two months she had uttered complaints that were not Christian
and might have shocked them； she had repulsed her children and clung
to life unworthily； but she attributed this failure of submission to
the will of God to her intolerable sufferings。 Finally； she publicly
thanked the Abbe Birotteau with heartfelt warmth for having shown her
the illusion of all earthly things。
When she ceased to speak； prayers were said again； and the curate of
Sache gave her the viaticum。 A few moments later her breathing became
difficult； a film overspread her eyes； but soon they cleared again；
she gave me a last look and died to the eyes of earth； hearing perhaps
the symphony of our sobs。 As her last sigh issued from her lips；the
effort of a life that was one long anguish；I felt a blow within me
that struck on all my faculties。 The count and I remained beside the
bier all night with the two abbes and the curate； watching； in the
glimmer of the tapers； the body of the departed； now so calm； laid
upon the mattress of her bed； where once she had suffered cruelly。 It
was my first communion with death。 I remained the whole of that night
with my eyes fixed on Henriette； spell…bound by the pure expression
that came from the stilling of all tempests； by the whiteness of that
face where still I saw the traces of her innumerable affections；
although it made no answer to my love。 What majesty in that silence；
in that coldness！ How many thoughts they expressed！ What beauty in
that cold repose； what power in that immobility！ All the past was
there and futurity had begun。 Ah！ I loved her dead as much as I had
loved her living。 In the morning the count went to bed； the three
wearied priests fell asleep in that heavy hour of dawn so well known
to those who watch。 I could then； without witnesses； kiss that sacred
brow with all the love I had never been allowed to utter。
The third day； in a cool autumn morning； we followed the countess to
her last home。 She was carried by the old huntsman； the two
Martineaus； and Manette's husband。 We went down by the road I had so
joyously ascended the day I first returned to her。 We crossed the
valley of the Indre to the little cemetery of Sachea poor village
graveyard； placed behind the church on the slope of the hill； where
with true humility she had asked to be buried beneath a simple cross
of black wood； 〃like a poor country…woman；〃 she said。 When I saw； from
the centre of the valley； the village church and the place of the
graveyard a convulsive shudder seized me。 Alas！ we have all our
Golgothas； where we leave the first thirty…three years of our lives；
with the lance…wound in our side； the crown of thorns and not of roses
on our browthat hill…slope was to me the mount of expiation。
We were followed by an immense crowd； seeking to express the grief of
the valley where she had silently buried so many noble actions。
Manette； her faithful woman； told me that when her savings did not
suffice to help the poor she economized upon her dress。 There were
babes to be provided for； naked children to be clothed； mothers
succored in their need； sacks of flour brought to the millers in
winter for helpless old men； a cow sent to some poor home；deeds of a
Christian woman； a mother； and the lady of the manor。 Besides these
things； there were dowries paid to enable loving hearts to marry；
substitutes bought for youths to whom the draft had brought despair；
tender offerings of the loving woman who had said： 〃The happiness of
others is the consolation of those who cannot themselves be happy。〃
Such things； related at the 〃veillees；〃 made the crowd immense。 I
walked with Jacques and the two abbes behind the coffin。 According to
custom neither the count nor Madeleine were present； they remained
alone at Clochegourde。 But Manette insisted in coming with us。 〃Poor
madame！ poor madame！ sh