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over the teacups-第74章

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coolly。  Continuations almost always sag a little。  I will not say

that of my own second effort; but if others said it; I should not be

disposed to wonder at or to dispute them。



〃The Poet at the Breakfast Table〃 came some years later。  This series

of papers was not so much a continuation as a resurrection。  It was a

doubly hazardous attempt; made without any extravagant expectations;

and was received as well as I had any right to anticipate。  It

differed from the other two series in containing a poem of

considerable length; published in successive portions。  This poem

holds a good deal of self…communing; and gave me the opportunity of

expressing some thoughts and feelings not to be found elsewhere in my

writings。  I had occasion to read the whole volume; not long since;

in preparation for a new edition; and was rather more pleased with it

than I had expected to be。  An old author is constantly rediscoving

himself in the more or less fossilized productions of his earlier

years。  It is a long time since I have read the 〃Autocrat;〃 but I

take it up now and then and read in it for a few minutes; not always

without some degree of edification。



These three series of papers; 〃Autocrat;〃 〃Professor;〃  〃Poet;〃 are

all studies of life from somewhat different points of view。  They are

largely made up of sober reflections; and appeared to me to require

some lively human interest to save them from wearisome didactic

dulness。  What could be more natural than that love should find its

way among the young people who helped to make up the circle gathered

around the table?  Nothing is older than the story of young love。

Nothing is newer than that same old story。  A bit of gilding here and

there has a wonderful effect in enlivening a landscape or an

apartment。  Napoleon consoled the Parisians in their year of defeat

by gilding the dome of the Invalides。  Boston has glorified her State

House and herself at the expense of a few sheets of gold leaf laid on

the dome; which shines like a sun in the eyes of her citizens; and

like a star in those of the approaching traveller。  I think the

gilding of a love…story helped all three of these earlier papers。

The same need I felt in the series of papers just closed。  The slight

incident of Delilah's appearance and disappearance served my purpose

to some extent。  But what should I do with Number Five?  The reader

must follow out her career for himself。  For myself; I think that she

and the Tutor have both utterly forgotten the difference of their

years in the fascination of intimate intercourse。  I do not believe

that a nature so large; so rich in affection; as Number Five's is

going to fall defeated of its best inheritance of life; like a vine

which finds no support for its tendrils to twine around; and so

creeps along the ground from which nature meant that love should lift

it。  I feel as if I ought to follow these two personages of my

sermonizing story until they come together or separate; to fade; to

wither;perhaps to die; at last; of something like what the doctors

call heart…failure; but which might more truly be called heart…

starvation。  When I say die; I do not mean necessarily the death that

goes into the obituary column。  It may come to that; in one or both;

but I think that; if they are never united; Number Five will outlive

the Tutor; who will fall into melancholy ways; and pine and waste;

while she lives along; feeling all the time that she has cheated

herself of happiness。  I hope that is not going to be their fortune;

or misfortune。  Vieille fille fait jeune mariee。  What a youthful

bride Number Five would be; if she could only make up her mind to

matrimony!  In the mean time she must be left with her lambs all

around her。  May heaven temper the winds to them; for they have been

shorn very close; every one of them; of their golden fleece of

aspirations and anticipations。



I must avail myself of this opportunity to say a few words to my

distant friends who take interest enough in my writings; early or

recent; to wish to enter into communication with me by letter; or to

keep up a communication already begun。  I have given notice in print

that the letters; books; and manuscripts which I receive by mail are

so numerous that if I undertook to read and answer them all I should

have little time for anything else。  I have for some years depended

on the assistance of a secretary; but our joint efforts have proved

unable; of late; to keep down the accumulations which come in with

every mail。  So many of the letters I receive are of a pleasant

character that it is hard to let them go unacknowledged。  The extreme

friendliness which pervades many of them gives them a value which I

rate very highly。  When large numbers of strangers insist on claiming

one as a friend; on the strength of what he has written; it tends to

make him think of himself somewhat indulgently。  It is the most

natural thing in the world to want to give expression to the feeling

the loving messages from far…off unknown friends must excite。  Many a

day has had its best working hours broken into; spoiled for all

literary work; by the labor of answering correspondents whose good

opinion it is gratifying to have called forth; but who were

unconsciously laying a new burden on shoulders already aching。  I

know too well that what I say will not reach the eyes of many who

might possibly take a hint from it。  Still I must keep repeating it

before breaking off suddenly and leaving whole piles of letters

unanswered。  I have been very heavily handicapped for many years。  It

is partly my own fault。  From what my correspondents tell me; I must

infer that I have established a dangerous reputation for willingness

to answer all sorts of letters。  They come with such insinuating

humility; they cannot bear to intrude upon my time; they know that

I have a great many calls upon it;and incontinently proceed to lay

their additional weight on the load which is breaking my back。



The hypocrisy of kind…hearted people is one of the most painful

exhibitions of human weakness。  It has occurred to me that it might

be profitable to reproduce some of my unwritten answers to

correspondents。  If those which were actually written and sent were

to be printed in parallel columns with those mentally formed but not

written out responses and comments; the reader would get some idea of

the internal conflicts an honest and not unamiable person has to go

through; when he finds himself driven to the wall by a correspondence

which is draining his vocabulary to find expressions that sound as

agreeably; and signify as little; as the phrases used by a

diplomatist in closing an official communication。



No。  1。  Want my autograph; do you?  And don't know how to spell my

name。  An a for an e in my middle name。  Leave out the l in my last

name。  Do you know how people hate to have their names misspelled?

What do you suppose are the sentiments entertained by the Thompso
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