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of the Scotch jury in particular； in your case。 To that one
object I dedicate my life to come； if God spare me！
〃Who will help me； when I need help； is more than I yet know。
There was a time when I had hoped that we should go hand in hand
together in doing this good work。 That hope is at an end。 I no
longer expect you； or ask you； to help me。 A man who thinks as
you think can give no help to anybodyit is his miserable
condition to have no hope。 So be it！ I will hope for two； and
will work for two； and I shall find some one to help menever
fearif I deserve it。
〃I will say nothing about my plansI have not read the Trial
yet。 It is quite enough for me that I know you are i nnocent。
When a man is innocent； there _must_ be a way of proving it： the
one thing needful is to find the way。 Sooner or later； with or
without assistance； I shall find it。 Yes！ before I know any
single particular of the Case； I tell you positivelyI shall
find it！
〃You may laugh over this blind confidence on my part； or you may
cry over it。 I don't pretend to know whether I am an object for
ridicule or an object for pity。 Of one thing only I am certain： I
mean to win you back； a man vindicated before the world； without
a stain on his character or his namethanks to his wife。
〃Write to me； sometimes； Eustace； and believe me； through all the
bitterness of this bitter business； your faithful and loving
〃VALERIA。〃
There was my reply！ Poor enough as a composition （I could write a
much better letter now）； it had； if I may presume to say so； one
merit。 It was the honest expression of what I really meant and
felt。
I read it to Benjamin。 He held up his hands with his customary
gesture when he was thoroughly bewildered and dismayed。 〃It seems
the rashest letter that ever was written；〃 said the dear old man。
〃I never heard； Valeria； of a woman doing what you propose to do。
Lord help us！ the new generation is beyond my fathoming。 I wish
your uncle Starkweather was here： I wonder what he would say？ Oh；
dear me； what a letter from a wife to a husband！ Do you really
mean to send it to him？〃
I added immeasurably to my old friend's surprise by not even
employing the post…office。 I wished to see the 〃instructions〃
which my husband had left behind him。 So I took the letter to his
lawyers myself。
The firm consisted of two partners。 They both received me
together。 One was a soft； lean man； with a sour smile。 The other
was a hard； fat man； with ill…tempered eyebrows。 I took a great
dislike to both of them。 On their side； they appeared to feel a
strong distrust of me。 We began by disagreeing。 They showed me my
husband's 〃instructions；〃 providing； among other things； for the
payment of one clear half of his income as long as he lived to
his wife。 I positively refused to touch a farthing of his money。
The lawyers were unaffectedly shocked and astonished at this
decision。 Nothing of the sort had ever happened before in the
whole course of their experience。 They argued and remonstrated
with me。 The partner with the ill…tempered eyebrows wanted to
know what my reasons were。 The partner with the sour smile
reminded his colleague satirically that I was a lady； and had
therefore no reasons to give。 I only answered； 〃Be so good as to
forward my letter； gentlemen；〃 and left them。
I have no wish to claim any credit to myself in these pages which
I do not honestly deserve。 The truth is that my pride forbade me
to accept help from Eustace； now that he had left me。 My own
little fortune （eight hundred a year） had been settled on myself
when I married。 It had been more than I wanted as a single woman；
and I was resolved that it should be enough for me now。 Benjamin
had insisted on my considering his cottage as my home。 Under
these circumstances； the expenses in which my determination to
clear my husband's character might involve me were the only
expenses for which I had to provide。 I could afford to be
independent； and independent I resolved that I would be。
While I am occupied in confessing my weakness and my errors； it
is only right to add that； dearly as I still loved my unhappy；
misguided husband； there was one little fault of his which I
found it not easy to forgive。
Pardoning other things； I could not quite pardon his concealing
from me that he had been married to a first wife。 Why I should
have felt this so bitterly as I did； at certain times and
seasons； I am not able to explain。 Jealousy was at the bottom of
it； I suppose。 And yet I was not conscious of being
jealousespecially when I thought of the poor creature's
miserable death。 Still； Eustace ought not to have kept _that_
secret from me； I used to think to myself； at odd times when I
was discouraged and out of temper。 What would _he_ have said if I
had been a widow； and had never told him of it？
It was getting on toward evening when I returned to the cottage。
Benjamin appeared to have been on the lookout for me。 Before I
could ring at the bell he opened the garden gate。
〃Prepare yourself for a surprise； my dear；〃 he said。 〃Your uncle；
the Reverend Doctor Starkweather； has arrived from the North； and
is waiting to see you。 He received your letter this morning； and
he took the first train to London as soon as he had read it。〃
In another minute my uncle's strong arms were round me。 In my
forlorn position； I felt the good vicar's kindness； in traveling
all the way to London to see me； very gratefully。 It brought the
tears into my eyestears； without bitterness； that did me good。
〃I have come； my dear child； to take you back to your old home；〃
he said。 〃No words can tell how fervently I wish you had never
left your aunt and me。 Well！ well！ we won't talk about it。 The
mischief is done； and the next thing is to mend it as well as we
can。 If I could only get within arm's…length of that husband of
yours； ValeriaThere！ there！ God forgive me； I am forgetting
that I am a clergyman。 What shall I forget next； I wonder？
By…the…by； your aunt sends you her dearest love。 She is more
superstitious than ever。 This miserable business doesn't surprise
her a bit。 She says it all began with your making that mistake
about your name in signing the church register。 You remember？ Was
there ever such stuff？ Ah； she's a foolish woman； that wife of
mine！ But she means wella good soul at bottom。 She would have
traveled all the way here along with me if I would have let her。
I said； 'No； you stop at home； and look after the house and the
parish； and I'll bring the child back。' You shall have your old
bedroom； Valeria； with the white curtains； you know； looped up
with blue！ We will return to the Vicarage （if you can get up in
time） by the nine…forty train to…morrow morning。〃
Return to the Vicarage！ How could I do that？ How could I hope to
gain what was now the one object of my existence if I buried
myself in a remote north…country village？ It was simply
impossible for me to accompany Doctor Starkweather on his return
to his own house。
〃I thank you； uncle； with all my heart；〃 I said。 〃But I am afraid
I can't leave London for the present。〃
〃You can't leave London for the present？〃 he repeat