stories of a western town-第4章

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he　wife；　who　said；　〃You　see　it　don't　make　so　much　difference　with　my　Kurt　'bout　de　prize；　if　so　he　can　get　the　furniture　like　he　wants　it；　and　he　always　know　of　the　best　in　the　old　country〃）　they　all　were　duly　humble。　　He　accepted　a　few　orders　and　went　to　work　with　a　will；　he　would　show　them　what　the　old　man　could　do。　But　it　was　only　a　temporary　gleam；　in　a　little　while　he　grew　homesick　for　the　shop；　for　the　sawdust　floor　and　the　familiar　smell　of　oil；　and　the　picture　of　Lossing　flitting　in　and　out。　He　missed　the　careless　young　workmen　at　whom　he　had　grumbled；　he　missed　the　whir　of　machinery；　and　the　consciousness　of　rush　and　hurry　accented　by　the　cars　on　the　track　outside。　In　short；　he　missed　the　feeling　of　being　part　of　a　great　whole。　At　home；　in　his　cosey　little　improvised　shop；　there　was　none　to　dispute　him；　but　there　was　none　to　obey　him　either。　He　grew　deathly　tired　of　it　all。　　He　got　into　the　habit　of　walking　around　the　shops　at　night；　prowling　about　his　old　haunts　like　a　cat。　　Once　the　night　watchman　saw　him。　The　next　day　there　was　a　second　watchman　engaged。　And　Olsen　told　him　very　kindly；　meaning　only　to　warn　him；　that　he　was　suspected　to　be　there　for　no　good　purpose。　Lieders　confirmed　a　lurking　suspicion　of　the　good　Carl's　own；　by　the　clouding　of　his　face。　　Yet　he　would　have　chopped　his　hand　off　rather　than　have　lifted　it　against　the　shop。　That　was　Tuesday　night；　this　was　Wednesday　morning。　The　memory　of　it　all；　the　cruel　sense　of　injustice；　returned　with　such　poignant　force　that　Lieders　groaned　aloud。　Instantly；　Thekla　was　bending　over　him。　　He　did　not　know　whether　to　laugh　at　her　or　to　swear；　for　she　began　fumbling　at　the　ropes；　half　sobbing。　〃Yes；　I　knowed　they　was　hurting　you；　papa；　I'm　going　to　loose　one　arm。　Then　I　put　it　back　again　and　loose　the　other。　　Please　don't　be　bad！〃　He　made　no　resistance　and　she　was　as　good　as　her　word。　She　unbound　and　bound　him　in　sections；　as　it　were；　he　watching　her　with　a　morose　smile。　Then　she　left　the　room；　but　only　to　return　with　some　hot　coffee。　Lieders　twisted　his　head　away。　　〃No；〃　said　he；　〃I　don't　eat　none　of　that　breakfast；　not　if　you　make　fresh　coffee　all　the　morning；　I　feel　like　I　don't　eat　never　no　more　on　earth。〃　Thekla　knew　that　the　obstinate　nature　that　she　tempted　was　proof　against　temptation；　if　Kurt　chose　to　starve；　starve　he　would　with　food　at　his　elbow。　〃Oh；　papa；〃　she　cried；　helplessly；　〃what　IS　the　matter　with　you？〃　〃Just　dying　is　the　matter　with　me；　Thekla。　　If　I　can't　die　one　way　I　kin　another。　　Now　Thekla；　I　want　you　to　quit　crying　and　listen。　After　I'm　gone　you　go　to　the　boss；　young　Mr。　Lossing　but　I　always　called　him　Harry　because　he　learned　his　trade　of　me；　Thekla；　but　he　don't　think　of　that　nowand　you　tell　him　old　Lieders　that　worked　for　him　thirty　years　is　dead；　but　he　didn't　hold　no　hard　feelings；　he　knowed　he　done　wrong　'bout　that　mantel。　Mind　you　tell　him。〃　〃Yes；　papa；〃　said　Thekla；　which　was　a　surprise　to　Kurt；　he　had　dreaded　a　weak　flood　of　tears　and　protestations。　But　there　were　no　tears；　no　protestations；　only　a　long　look　at　him　and　a　contraction　of　the　eyebrows　as　if　Thekla　were　trying　to　think　of　something　that　eluded　her。　　She　placed　the　coffee　on　the　tray　beside　the　other　breakfast。　　For　a　while　the　room　was　very　still。　Lieders　could　not　see　the　look　of　resolve　that　finally　smoothed　the　perplexed　lines　out　of　his　wife's　kind；　simple　old　face。　She　rose。　　〃Kurt；〃　she　said；　〃I　don't　guess　you　remember　this　is　our　wedding…day；　it　was　this　day；　eighteen　year　we　was　married。〃　〃So！〃　said　Lieders；　〃well；　I　was　a　bad　bargain　to　you；　Thekla；　after　you　nursed　your　father　that　was　a　cripple　for　twenty　years；　I　thought　it　would　be　easy　with　me；　but　I　was　a　bad　bargain。〃　〃The　Lord　knows　best　about　that；〃　said　Thekla；　simply；　〃be　it　how　it　be；　you　are　the　only　man　I　ever　had　or　will　have；　and　I　don't　like　you　starve　yourself。　　Papa；　say　you　don't　kill　yourself；　to…day；　and　dat　you　will　eat　your　breakfast！〃　〃Yes；〃　Lieders　repeated　in　German；　〃a　bad　bargain　for　thee；　that　is　sure。　But　thou　hast　been　a　good　bargain　for　me。　　Here！　　I　promise。　Not　this　day。　　Give　me　the　coffee。〃　He　had　seasons；　all　the　morning；　of　wondering　over　his　meekness；　and　his　agreement　to　be　tied　up　again；　at　night。　　But　still；　what　did　a　day　matter？　a　man　humors　women's　notions；　and　starving　was　so　tedious。　　Between　whiles　he　elaborated　a　scheme　to　attain　his　end。　　How　easy　to　outwit　the　silly　Thekla！　　His　eyes　shone；　as　he　hid　the　little；　sharp　knife　up　his　cuff。　　〃Let　her　tie　me！〃　says　Lieders；　〃I　keep　my　word。　　To…morrow　I　be　out　of　this。　He　won't　git　a　man　like　me；　pretty　soon！〃　Thekla　went　about　her　daily　tasks；　with　her　every…day　air；　but；　now　and　again；　that　same　pucker　of　thought　returned　to　her　forehead；　and；　more　than　once；　Lieders　saw　her　stand　over　some　dish；　poising　her　spoon　in　air；　too　abstracted　to　notice　his　cynical　observation。　The　dinner　was　more　elaborate　than　common；　and　Thekla　had　broached　a　bottle　of　her　currant　wine。　　She　gravely　drank　Lieders's　health。　〃And　many　good　days；　papa；〃　she　said。　Lieders　felt　a　queer　movement　of　pity。　　After　the　table　was　cleared；　he　helped　his　wife　to　wash　and　wipe　the　dishes　as　his　custom　was　of　a　Sunday　or　holiday。　　He　wiped　dishes　as　he　did　everything；　neatly；　slowly；　with　a　careful　deliberation。　Not　until　the　dishes　were　put　away　and　the　couple　were　seated；　did　Thekla　speak。　〃Kurt；〃　she　said；　〃I　got　to　talk　to　you。〃　An　inarticulate　groan　and　a　glance　at　the　door　from　Lieders。　〃I　just　got　to；　papa。　　It　aint　righd　for　you　to　do　the　way　you　been　doing　for　so　long　time；　efery　little　whiles　you　try　to　kill　yourself；　no；　papa；　that　aint　righd！〃　Kurt；　who　had　gotten　out　his　pencils　and　compasses　and　other　drawing　tools；　grunted：　　〃I　got　to　look　at　my　work；　Thekla；　now；　I　am　too　busy　to　talk。〃　〃No；　Kurt；　no；　papa〃the　hands　holding　the　blue　apron　that　she　was　embroidering　with　white　linen　began　to　tremble；　Lieders　had　not　the　least　idea　what　a　strain　it　was　on　this　reticent；　slow　of　speech　woman　who　had　stood　in　awe　of　him　for　eighteen　years；　to　discuss　the　horror　of　her　life；　but　he　could　not　help　marking　her　agitation。　She　went　on；　desperately：　　〃Yes；　papa；　I　got　to　talk　it　oud　with　you。　You　had　ought　to　listen；　'cause　I　always　been　a　good　wife　to　you　and　nefer　refused　you　notings。　　No。〃　〃Well；　I　aint　saying　I　done　it　'cause　you　been　bad　to　me；　everybody　knows　we　aint　had　no　trouble。〃　〃But　everybody　what　don't　know　us；　when　they　read　how　you　tried　to　kill　yourself　in　the　papers；　they　think　it　was　me。　That　always　is　so。　　And　now　I　never　can　any　more　sleep　nights；　for　you　is　always　maybe　git　up　and　do　something　to　yourself。　So　now；　I　got　to　talk　to　you；　papa。　　Papa；　how　could　you　done　so？〃　Lieders　twisted　his　feet　under　the　rungs　of　his　chair；　he　opened　his　mouth；　but　only　to　shut　it　again　with　a　click　of　his　teeth。　〃I　got　my　mind　made　up；　papa。　　I　tought　and　I　tought。　　I　know　WHY　you　done　it；　you　done　it　'cause　you　and　the　boss　was　mad　at　each　other。　The　boss　hadn't　no　righd　to　let　you　go　〃　〃Yes；　he　had；　I　madded　him　first；　I　was　a　fool。　　Of　course　I　knowed　more　than　him　'bout　the　work；　but　I　hadn't　no　right　to　go　against　him。　The　boss　is　all　right。〃　〃Yes；　papa；　I　got　my　mind　made　up〃like　most　sluggish　spirits　there　was　an　immense　momentum　a