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jeremy-第44章

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were barns。 Behind the house thick trees; clouded with green;
showed。 In the middle of the court was a pump; and all about the
flagged stones pigeons were delicately walking。 As they drove up;
the pigeons rose in a wheeling flight against the sky now staining
faintly with amber; dogs rushed barking from the barns; a haycart
turned the comer; its wheels creaking; and four little children
perched high on the top of the hay。 Then the hall…door opened; and
behold Mrs。 Monk; Mr。 Monk; and; clustering shyly behind; the little
Monks。

In the scene that followed Jeremy was forgotten。 He did not know
what it was that made him hang behind the others; but he stood
beside the wagonette; bent down and released Hamlet; and then
waited; hiding under the shadow of the cart。 His happiness was
almost intolerable; he could not speak; he could not move; and in
the heart of his happiness there was a strange unhappiness that he
had never known before。 The loneliness that he had felt at Liskane
Station was intensified; so that he felt like a stranger who was
seeing his father; or his mother; or aunt; or sisters for the first
time。 Everything about him emphasised the loneliness: the slow
evening light that was stealing into the sky; the sound of some
machine in the farm…house turning with a melancholy rhythmic whine;
a voice calling in the fields; the rumble of the sea; the twittering
of birds in the garden trees; the bark of a dog far; far away; and;
through them all; the sense that the world was sinking down into
silence; and that all the sounds were slipping away; like visitors
hurrying from the park before the gates are shut; he stood there;
listening; caught into a life that was utterly his own and had no
share with any other。 He looked around and saw that they were all
going into the house; that Jim and Mr。 Monk were busy with the
boxes; and that no one was aware of him。 He knew what he wanted。

He slipped across the court; and dropped into the black cavernous
hole of the farther barn。 At first the darkness stopped him; but he
knew his way; found the steps that led up to the loft; and was soon
perched high behind a little square window that was now blue and
gold against the velvety blackness behind him。 This was his
favourite spot in all the farm。 Here; all the year; they stored the
apples; and the smell of the fruit was thick in the air; sweet and
strong; clinging about every fibre of the place; so that you could
not disturb a strand nor a stone without sending some new drift of
the scent up against your nostrils。 All the year after his first
visit; Jeremy had been longing to smell that smell again; and now he
knelt up against the window; drinking it in。 With his eyes he
searched the horizon。 From here you could see the garden with the
sun… dial; the fields beyond; the sudden dip with the trees at the
edge of it bent crossways by the wind; and there; in such a cup as
one's hands might form; just beyond; was the sea。 。 。

He stared as though his eyes would start from his head。 Behind him
was the cloudy smoke of the apple…scent; in front of him the sun was
sinking towards the dark elms。 Soon the trees would catch the sun
and hide it; the galleon cloud that had been over them as they drove
was new banked in red and gold across the horizon; birds slowly;
lazily fled to their homes。

He heard someone call; 〃Jeremy! Jeremy!〃 With a last gaze he saw the
blue cup turn to gold; the sun reached the tops of the elms; the
fields were lit with the glitter of shining glass; then; even as he
watched; they were purple; then grey; then dim like smoke。

Again the voice called 〃Jeremy!〃 He slipped from the window; found
the little stair; ran across the dusky court and entered the house。




CHAPTER IX

THE AWAKENING OF CHARLOTTE


I


Towards the end of the first fortnight's stay at Cow Farm it was
announced that very shortly there would be a picnic at Rafiel Cove。

Jeremy had been waiting for this proclamation; once or twice he had
asked whether they were going to the Cove and had been told 〃not to
bother;〃 〃all in good time;〃 and other ridiculous elderly
finalities; but he knew that the day must come; as it had always
come every year。 The picnic at Rafield was always the central event
of the summer。 And he had this year another reason for excited
anticipationthe wonderful Charlotte Le Page was to be present。
Until now Jeremy had never taken the slightest interest in girls。
Mary and Helen; being his sisters; were necessities and
inevitabilities; but that did not mean that he could not get along
very easily without them; and indeed Mary with her jealousies; her
strange sulky temper and sudden sentimental repentances was
certainly a burden and restraint。 As to the little girls in
Polchester; he had frankly found them tiresome and stupid; thinking
of themselves; terrified of the most natural phenomena and
untruthful in their statements。 He had been always independent and
reserved with everyone; and bud never; in all his life; had a close
friend; but there had been; especially of late; boys with whom it
had been amusing to spend an hour or two; and since his fight with
the Dean's Ernest he had thought that it would be rather interesting
to make a further trial of strength with whomsoever 。 。 。

Girls were stupid; uninteresting; conceited and slow。 He never; in
all his life; wanted to have anything to do with girls。 But
Charlotte Le Page was another matter。 She had; in the first place;
become quite a tradition in the Cole family。 She was the daughter of
a wealthy landowner; who always spent his holidays in Rafiel。 She
and her very beautiful; very superior mother had been seen on many
occasions by the Coles driving about the Glebeshire roads in a fine
and languid manner; a manner to which the Coles knew; very well;
they themselves could never attain。 Then Mrs。 Cole had called; and
Mrs。 Le Page and Charlotte had come to tea at Cow Farm。 This had
been a year ago; when Jeremy had been only seven; nevertheless; he
had been present during the first part of the ceremony; and
Charlotte had struck him as entirely amazing。

He had simply gazed at her with his mouth open; forgetting all his
good manners。 She was at this time nine or ten years of age but very
small and; as they say of the most modern kind of doll; 〃perfect in
every particular。〃 She had wonderful hair of a bright rippling gold;
her cheeks were pink and her eyes were blue; and she was so
beautifully dressed that you could not take in details but must
simply surrender yourself to a cloudy film of white or blue; with
everything so perfectly in its place that it seemed to the rough and
ready Jeremy quite unearthly。 Of course she had to be very careful
how she walked; when she sat down; in what way she moved her hands
and feet; and how she blew her nose。 It was wonderful to see her do
these things; she did them so naturally and yet always with a sense
of an effort overcome for the good of humanity。 Her mother never
ceased to empty praises at her feet; appealing to visitors with:
〃Isn't Charlotte too lovely to…day?〃 or 〃Really; Mrs。 Cole; did you
ever see anything like Charlotte's hair?〃 or 〃Jus
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