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the diary of a nobody-第10章

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August 22。 … Home sweet Home again!  Carrie bought some pretty blue…wool mats to stand vases on。  Fripps; Janus and Co。 write to say they are sorry they have no vacancy among their staff of clerks for Lupin。

August 23。 … I bought a pair of stags' heads made of plaster…of… Paris and coloured brown。  They will look just the thing for our little hall; and give it style; the heads are excellent imitations。 Poolers and Smith are sorry they have nothing to offer Lupin。

August 24。 … Simply to please Lupin; and make things cheerful for him; as he is a little down; Carrie invited Mrs。 James to come up from Sutton and spend two or three days with us。  We have not said a word to Lupin; but mean to keep it as a surprise。

August 25。 … Mrs。 James; of Sutton; arrived in the afternoon; bringing with her an enormous bunch of wild flowers。  The more I see of Mrs James the nicer I think she is; and she is devoted to Carrie。  She went into Carrie's room to take off her bonnet; and remained there nearly an hour talking about dress。  Lupin said he was not a bit surprised at Mrs。 James' VISIT; but was surprised at HER。

August 26; Sunday。 … Nearly late for church; Mrs。 James having talked considerably about what to wear all the morning。  Lupin does not seem to get on very well with Mrs。 James。  I am afraid we shall have some trouble with our next…door neighbours who came in last Wednesday。  Several of their friends; who drive up in dog…carts; have already made themselves objectionable。

An evening or two ago I had put on a white waistcoat for coolness; and while walking past with my thumbs in my waistcoat pockets (a habit I have); one man; seated in the cart; and looking like an American; commenced singing some vulgar nonsense about 〃I HAD THIRTEEN DOLLARS IN MY WAISTCOAT POCKET。〃  I fancied it was meant for me; and my suspicions were confirmed; for while walking round the garden in my tall hat this afternoon; a 〃throw…down〃 cracker was deliberately aimed at my hat; and exploded on it like a percussion cap。  I turned sharply; and am positive I saw the man who was in the cart retreating from one of the bedroom windows。

August 27。 … Carrie and Mrs。 James went off shopping; and had not returned when I came back from the office。  Judging from the subsequent conversation; I am afraid Mrs。 James is filling Carrie's head with a lot of nonsense about dress。  I walked over to Gowing's and asked him to drop in to supper; and make things pleasant。

Carrie prepared a little extemporised supper; consisting of the remainder of the cold joint; a small piece of salmon (which I was to refuse; in case there was not enough to go round); and a blanc… mange and custards。  There was also a decanter of port and some jam puffs on the sideboard。  Mrs。 James made us play rather a good game of cards; called 〃Muggings。〃  To my surprise; in fact disgust; Lupin got up in the middle; and; in a most sarcastic tone; said: 〃Pardon me; this sort of thing is too fast for me; I shall go and enjoy a quiet game of marbles in the back…garden。〃

Things might have become rather disagreeable but for Gowing (who seems to have taken to Lupin) suggesting they should invent games。 Lupin said:  〃Let's play 'monkeys。'〃  He then led Gowing all round the room; and brought him in front of the looking…glass。  I must confess I laughed heartily at this。  I was a little vexed at everybody subsequently laughing at some joke which they did not explain; and it was only on going to bed I discovered I must have been walking about all the evening with an antimacassar on one button of my coat…tails。

August 28。 … Found a large brick in the middle bed of geraniums; evidently come from next door。  Pattles and Pattles can't find a place for Lupin。

August 29。 … Mrs。 James is making a positive fool of Carrie。 Carrie appeared in a new dress like a smock…frock。  She said 〃smocking〃 was all the rage。  I replied it put me in a rage。  She also had on a hat as big as a kitchen coal…scuttle; and the same shape。  Mrs。 James went home; and both Lupin and I were somewhat pleased … the first time we have agreed on a single subject since his return。  Merkins and Son write they have no vacancy for Lupin。

October 30。 … I should very much like to know who has wilfully torn the last five or six weeks out of my diary。  It is perfectly monstrous!  Mine is a large scribbling diary; with plenty of space for the record of my everyday events; and in keeping up that record I take (with much pride) a great deal of pains。

I asked Carrie if she knew anything about it。  She replied it was my own fault for leaving the diary about with a charwoman cleaning and the sweeps in the house。  I said that was not an answer to my question。  This retort of mine; which I thought extremely smart; would have been more effective had I not jogged my elbow against a vase on a table temporarily placed in the passage; knocked it over; and smashed it。

Carrie was dreadfully upset at this disaster; for it was one of a pair of vases which cannot be matched; given to us on our wedding… day by Mrs。 Burtsett; an old friend of Carrie's cousins; the Pommertons; late of Dalston。  I called to Sarah; and asked her about the diary。  She said she had not been in the sitting…room at all; after the sweep had left; Mrs。 Birrell (the charwoman) had cleaned the room and lighted the fire herself。  Finding a burnt piece of paper in the grate; I examined it; and found it was a piece of my diary。  So it was evident some one had torn my diary to light the fire。  I requested Mrs。 Birrell to be sent to me to… morrow。

October 31。 … Received a letter from our principal; Mr。 Perkupp; saying that he thinks he knows of a place at last for our dear boy Lupin。  This; in a measure; consoles me for the loss of a portion of my diary; for I am bound to confess the last few weeks have been devoted to the record of disappointing answers received from people to whom I have applied for appointments for Lupin。  Mrs。 Birrell called; and; in reply to me; said:  〃She never SEE no book; much less take such a liberty as TOUCH it。〃

I said I was determined to find out who did it; whereupon she said she would do her best to help me; but she remembered the sweep lighting the fire with a bit of the ECHO。  I requested the sweep to be sent to me to…morrow。  I wish Carrie had not given Lupin a latch…key; we never seem to see anything of him。  I sat up till past one for him; and then retired tired。

November 1。 … My entry yesterday about 〃retired tired;〃 which I did not notice at the time; is rather funny。  If I were not so worried just now; I might have had a little joke about it。  The sweep called; but had the audacity to come up to the hall…door and lean his dirty bag of soot on the door…step。  He; however; was so polite; I could not rebuke him。  He said Sarah lighted the fire。 Unfortunately; Sarah heard this; for she was dusting the banisters; and she ran down; and flew into a temper with the sweep; causing a row on the front door…steps; which I would not have had happen for anything。  I ordered her about her business; and told the sweep I was sorry to have troubled him; and so I was; for the door…steps were covered with soot in consequence of his visit。  I would willingl
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