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to come and consult us about things and invariably do as we said。
That； in his phraseology； was 〃maintaining the traditions of the
school。〃
He had indeed an effect not of a man directing a school； but of a
man captured and directed by a school。 Dead and gone Elizabethans
had begotten a monster that could carry him about in its mouth。
Yet being a man； as I say； with his hair a little stirred by a
Zeitgeist that made for change； Gates did at times display a
disposition towards developments。 City Merchants had no modern
side； and utilitarian spirits were carping in the PALL MALL GAZETTE
and elsewhere at the omissions from our curriculum； and particularly
at our want of German。 Moreover； four classes still worked
together with much clashing and uproar in the old Big Hall that had
once held in a common tumult the entire school。 Gates used to come
and talk to us older fellows about these things。
〃I don't wish to innovate unduly；〃 he used to say。 But we ought to
get in some German； you know；for those who like it。 The army men
will be wanting it some of these days。〃
He referred to the organisation of regular evening preparation for
the lower boys in Big Hall as a 〃revolutionary change；〃 but he
achieved it； and he declared he began the replacement of the hacked
wooden tables； at which the boys had worked since Tudor days； by
sloping desks with safety inkpots and scientifically adjustable
seats； 〃with grave misgivings。〃 And though he never birched a boy
in his life； and was； I am convinced； morally incapable of such a
scuffle； he retained the block and birch in the school through all
his term of office； and spoke at the Headmasters' Conference in
temperate approval of corporal chastisement； comparing it； dear
soul！ to the power of the sword。 。 。 。
I wish I could； in some measure and without tediousness； convey the
effect of his discourses to General Assembly in Big Hall。 But that
is like trying to draw the obverse and reverse of a sixpence worn to
complete illegibility。 His tall fine figure stood high on the days；
his thoughtful tenor filled the air as he steered his hazardous way
through sentences that dragged inconclusive tails and dropped
redundant prepositions。 And he pleaded ever so urgently； ever so
finely； that what we all knew for Sin was sinful； and on the whole
best avoided altogether； and so went on with deepening notes and
even with short arresting gestures of the right arm and hand； to
stir and exhort us towards goodness； towards that modern；
unsectarian goodness； goodness in general and nothing in particular；
which the Zeitgeist seemed to indicate in those transitional years。
7
The school never quite got hold of me。 Partly I think that was
because I was a day…boy and so freer than most of the boys； partly
because of a temperamental disposition to see things in my own way
and have my private dreams； partly because I was a little
antagonised by the family traditions that ran through the school。 I
was made to feel at first that I was a rank outsider； and I never
quite forgot it。 I suffered very little bullying； and I never had a
fightin all my time there were only three fightsbut I followed
my own curiosities。 I was already a very keen theologian and
politician before I was fifteen。 I was also intensely interested in
modern warfare。 I read the morning papers in the Reading Room
during the midday recess； never missed the illustrated weeklies； and
often when I could afford it I bought a PALL MALL GAZETTE on my way
home。
I do not think that I was very exceptional in that； most intelligent
boys； I believe； want naturally to be men； and are keenly interested
in men's affairs。 There is not the universal passion for a
magnified puerility among them it is customary to assume。 I was
indeed a voracious reader of everything but boys' bookswhich I
detestedand fiction。 I read histories； travel； popular science
and controversy with particular zest； and I loved maps。 School work
and school games were quite subordinate affairs for me。 I worked
well and made a passable figure at games； and I do not think I was
abnormally insensitive to the fine quality of our school； to the
charm of its mediaeval nucleus； its Gothic cloisters； its scraps of
Palladian and its dignified Georgian extensions； the contrast of the
old quiet； that in spite of our presence pervaded it everywhere；
with the rushing and impending London all about it； was indeed a
continual pleasure to me。 But these things were certainly not the
living and central interests of my life。
I had to conceal my wider outlook to a certain extentfrom the
masters even more than from the boys。 Indeed I only let myself go
freely with one boy； Britten； my especial chum； the son of the
Agent…General for East Australia。 We two discovered in a chance
conversation A PROPOS of a map in the library that we were both of
us curious why there were Malays in Madagascar； and how the Mecca
pilgrims came from the East Indies before steamships were available。
Neither of us had suspected that there was any one at all in the
school who knew or cared a rap about the Indian Ocean； except as
water on the way to India。 But Britten had come up through the Suez
Canal； and his ship had spoken a pilgrim ship on the way。 It gave
him a startling quality of living knowledge。 From these pilgrims we
got to a comparative treatment of religions； and from that； by a
sudden plunge； to entirely sceptical and disrespectful confessions
concerning Gates' last outbreak of simple piety in School Assembly。
We became congenial intimates from that hour。
The discovery of Britten happened to me when we were both in the
Lower Fifth。 Previously there had been a watertight compartment
between the books I read and the thoughts they begot on the one hand
and human intercourse on the other。 Now I really began my higher
education； and aired and examined and developed in conversation the
doubts； the ideas； the interpretations that had been forming in my
mind。 As we were both day…boys with a good deal of control over our
time we organised walks and expeditions together； and my habit of
solitary and rather vague prowling gave way to much more definite
joint enterprises。 I went several times to his house； he was the
youngest of several brothers； one of whom was a medical student and
let us assist at the dissection of a cat； and once or twice in
vacation time he came to Penge； and we went with parcels of
provisions to do a thorough day in the grounds and galleries of the
Crystal Palace； ending with the fireworks at close quarters。 We
went in a river steamboat down to Greenwich； and fired by that made
an excursion to Margate and back； we explored London docks and
Bethnal Green Museum； Petticoat Lane and all sorts of out…of…the…way
places together。
We confessed s