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Master shaver； master shaver！ how blind is he who cannot see through a
sieve。 Is it possible that you do not know that comparisons of wit
with wit； valour with valour； beauty with beauty； birth with birth；
are always odious and unwelcome？ I； master barber； am not Neptune； the
god of the waters； nor do I try to make anyone take me for an astute
man； for I am not one。 My only endeavour is to convince the world of
the mistake it makes in not reviving in itself the happy time when the
order of knight…errantry was in the field。 But our depraved age does
not deserve to enjoy such a blessing as those ages enjoyed when
knights…errant took upon their shoulders the defence of kingdoms；
the protection of damsels； the succour of orphans and minors； the
chastisement of the proud； and the recompense of the humble。 With
the knights of these days； for the most part； it is the damask；
brocade； and rich stuffs they wear； that rustle as they go； not the
chain mail of their armour； no knight now…a…days sleeps in the open
field exposed to the inclemency of heaven； and in full panoply from
head to foot； no one now takes a nap； as they call it； without drawing
his feet out of the stirrups； and leaning upon his lance； as the
knights…errant used to do； no one now； issuing from the wood；
penetrates yonder mountains； and then treads the barren； lonely
shore of the sea… mostly a tempestuous and stormy one… and finding
on the beach a little bark without oars； sail； mast； or tackling of
any kind； in the intrepidity of his heart flings himself into it and
commits himself to the wrathful billows of the deep sea； that one
moment lift him up to heaven and the next plunge him into the
depths； and opposing his breast to the irresistible gale； finds
himself； when he least expects it； three thousand leagues and more
away from the place where he embarked； and leaping ashore in a
remote and unknown land has adventures that deserve to be written； not
on parchment； but on brass。 But now sloth triumphs over energy；
indolence over exertion； vice over virtue； arrogance over courage； and
theory over practice in arms； which flourished and shone only in the
golden ages and in knights…errant。 For tell me； who was more
virtuous and more valiant than the famous Amadis of Gaul？ Who more
discreet than Palmerin of England？ Who more gracious and easy than
Tirante el Blanco？ Who more courtly than Lisuarte of Greece？ Who
more slashed or slashing than Don Belianis？ Who more intrepid than
Perion of Gaul？ Who more ready to face danger than Felixmarte of
Hircania？ Who more sincere than Esplandian？ Who more impetuous than
Don Cirongilio of Thrace？ Who more bold than Rodamonte？ Who more
prudent than King Sobrino？ Who more daring than Reinaldos？ Who more
invincible than Roland？ and who more gallant and courteous than
Ruggiero； from whom the dukes of Ferrara of the present day are
descended； according to Turpin in his 'Cosmography。' All these
knights； and many more that I could name； senor curate； were
knights…errant； the light and glory of chivalry。 These； or such as
these； I would have to carry out my plan； and in that case his Majesty
would find himself well served and would save great expense； and the
Turk would be left tearing his beard。 And so I will stay where I am；
as the chaplain does not take me away； and if Jupiter； as the barber
has told us； will not send rain； here am I； and I will rain when I
please。 I say this that Master Basin may know that I understand him。〃
〃Indeed； Senor Don Quixote；〃 said the barber； 〃I did not mean it
in that way； and； so help me God； my intention was good； and your
worship ought not to be vexed。〃
〃As to whether I ought to be vexed or not；〃 returned Don Quixote； 〃I
myself am the best judge。〃
Hereupon the curate observed； 〃I have hardly said a word as yet； and
I would gladly be relieved of a doubt； arising from what Don Quixote
has said； that worries and works my conscience。〃
〃The senor curate has leave for more than that；〃 returned Don
Quixote； 〃so he may declare his doubt； for it is not pleasant to
have a doubt on one's conscience。〃
〃Well then； with that permission；〃 said the curate； 〃I say my
doubt is that； all I can do； I cannot persuade myself that the whole
pack of knights…errant you； Senor Don Quixote； have mentioned； were
really and truly persons of flesh and blood； that ever lived in the
world； on the contrary； I suspect it to be all fiction； fable； and
falsehood； and dreams told by men awakened from sleep； or rather still
half asleep。〃
〃That is another mistake；〃 replied Don Quixote； 〃into which many
have fallen who do not believe that there ever were such knights in
the world； and I have often； with divers people and on divers
occasions； tried to expose this almost universal error to the light of
truth。 Sometimes I have not been successful in my purpose； sometimes I
have； supporting it upon the shoulders of the truth； which truth is so
clear that I can almost say I have with my own eyes seen Amadis of
Gaul； who was a man of lofty stature； fair complexion； with a handsome
though black beard； of a countenance between gentle and stern in
expression； sparing of words； slow to anger； and quick to put it
away from him； and as I have depicted Amadis； so I could； I think；
portray and describe all the knights…errant that are in all the
histories in the world； for by the perception I have that they were
what their histories describe； and by the deeds they did and the
dispositions they displayed； it is possible； with the aid of sound
philosophy； to deduce their features； complexion； and stature。〃
〃How big； in your worship's opinion； may the giant Morgante have
been； Senor Don Quixote？〃 asked the barber。
〃With regard to giants；〃 replied Don Quixote； 〃opinions differ as to
whether there ever were any or not in the world； but the Holy
Scripture； which cannot err by a jot from the truth； shows us that
there were； when it gives us the history of that big Philistine；
Goliath； who was seven cubits and a half in height； which is a huge
size。 Likewise； in the island of Sicily； there have been found
leg…bones and arm…bones so large that their size makes it plain that
their owners were giants； and as tall as great towers； geometry puts
this fact beyond a doubt。 But； for all that； I cannot speak with
certainty as to the size of Morgante； though I suspect he cannot
have been very tall； and I am inclined to be of this opinion because I
find in the history in which his deeds are particularly mentioned；
that he frequently slept under a roof and as he found houses to
contain him； it is clear that his bulk could not have been anything
excessive。〃
〃That is true；〃 said the curate； and yielding to the enjoyment of
hearing such nonsense； he asked him what was his notion of the
features of Reinaldos of Montalban； and Don Roland and the rest of the
Twelve Peers of France； for they were all knights…errant。
〃As for Reinaldos；〃 replied Don Quixote； 〃I venture to say that he
was broad…faced； of ruddy complexion； with roguish and somewhat
prominent eyes； excessively punctilious and touchy； and given to the
society of thieves and scapegraces。 With regard to Rol