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the efficiency expert-第13章

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〃I'm sure glad that I have a college education。  It has helped me materially to win to my present exalted standing in society。 Oh; well I might be worse off; I suppose。 At least I don't have to worry about the income tax。

〃It is now October; and since the first of the year I have earned forty dollars exactly。 I have also received a bequest of twenty dollars; which of course is exempt。 I venture to say that there is not another able…bodied adult male in the United States the making of whose income…tax schedule would be simpler than mine。〃

With which philosophic trend of thought; and the knowledge that he could eat for at least two weeks longer; the erstwhile star amateur first baseman sought the doubtful comfort of his narrow; lumpy bed。

It was in the neighborhood of two o'clock the next morning that he was awakened by a gentle tapping upon the panels of his door。

〃Who is it?〃 he asked。  〃What do you want?〃

〃It's me bo;〃 came the whispered reply in the unmistakable tones of the Lizard。

Jimmy arose; lighted the gas; and opened the door。

〃What's the matter?〃 he whispered。

〃Are the police on your trail?〃 〃No;〃 replied the Lizard; grinning。 〃I just dropped in to tell you that I grabbed a job for you。〃

〃Fine!〃 exclaimed Jimmy。 〃You're a regular fellow all right。〃

〃But you might not like the job;〃 suggested the Lizard。

〃As long as I can earn an honest dollar;〃 cried Jimmy; striking a dramatic pose; 〃I care not what it may be。〃

The Lizard's grin broadened。

〃I ain't so sure about that;〃 he said。  〃I know your kind。  You're a regular gent。 There is some honest jobs that you would just as soon have as the smallpox; and maybe this is one of them。〃

〃What is it?〃 asked Jimmy。  〃Don't keep me guessing any longer。〃

〃You know Feinheimer's Cabaret。〃

〃The basement joint on Wells Street?〃 asked Jimmy。  〃Sure I know it。〃

〃Well that's where I got you a job;〃 said the Lizard。

〃What doing?〃 asked Jimmy。

〃Waiter;〃 was the reply。

〃It isn't any worse than standing behind a counter; selling stockings to women;〃 said Jimmy。

〃It ain't such a bad job;〃 admitted the Lizard 〃if a guy ain't too swelled up。 Some of 'em make a pretty good thing out of it; what with their tips and short changingOh; there are lots of little ways to get yours at Feinheimer's。〃

〃I see; 〃said Jimmy; 〃but don't he pay any wages?〃

〃Oh; sure;〃 replied the Lizard; 〃you get the union scale。〃

〃When do I go to work?〃

〃Go around and see him to…morrow morning。  He will put you right to work。〃

And so the following evening the patrons of Feinheimer's Cabaret saw a new face among the untidy servitors of the establishmenta new face and a new figure; both of which looked out of place in the atmosphere of the basement resort。

Feinheimer's Cabaret held a unique place among the restaurants of the city。 Its patrons were from all classes of society。 At noon its many tables were largely filled by staid and respectable business men; but at night a certain element of the underworld claimed it as their own; and there was always a sprinkling of people of the stage; artists; literary men and politicians。 It was; as a certain wit described it; a social goulash; for in addition to its regular habitues there were those few who came occasionally from the upper stratum of society in the belief that they were doing something devilish。 As a matter of fact; slumming parties which began and ended at Feinheimer's were of no uncommon occurrence; and as the place was more than usually orderly it was with the greatest safety that society made excursions into the underworld of crime and vice through its medium。




CHAPTER X。

AT FEINHEIMER'S。

Feinheimer liked Jimmy's appearance。  He was big and strong; and the fact that Feinheimer always retained one or two powerful men upon his payroll accounted in a large measure for the orderliness of his place。 Occasionally one might start something at Feinheimer's; but no one was ever known to finish what he started。

And so Jimmy found himself waiting upon table at a place that was both reputable and disreputable; serving business men at noon and criminals and the women of the underworld at night。 In the weeks that he was there he came to know many of the local celebrities in various walks of life; to know them at least by name。 There was Steve Murray; the labor leader; whom rumor said was one of Feinheimer's financial backersa large man with a loud voice and the table manners of a Duroc…Jersey。 Jimmy took an instinctive dislike to the man the first time that he saw him。

And then there was Little Eva; whose real name was Edith。  She was a demure looking little girl; who came in every afternoon at four o'clock for her breakfast。 She usually came to Jimmy's table when it was vacant; and at four o'clock she always ate alone。 Later in the evening she would come in again with a male escort; who was never twice the same。

〃I wonder what's the matter with me?〃 she said to Jimmy one day as he was serving her breakfast。 〃I'm getting awfully nervous。〃 '

〃That's quite remarkable;〃 said Jimmy。  〃I should think any one who smoked as many cigarettes and drank as much whisky as you would have perfect nerves。〃

The girl laughed; a rather soft and mellow laugh。  〃I suppose I do hit it up a little strong;〃 she said。

〃Strong?〃 exclaimed Jimmy。  〃Why; if I drank half what you do I'd be in the Washingtonian Home in a week。〃

She looked at him quizzically for a moment; as she had looked at him often since he had gone to work for Feinheimer。

〃You're a funny guy;〃 she said。  〃I can't quite figure you out。  What are you doing here anyway?〃

〃I never claimed to be much of a waiter;〃 said Jimmy; 〃but I didn't know I was so rotten that a regular customer of the place couldn't tell what I was trying to do。〃

〃Oh; go on;〃 she cried; 〃I don't mean that。  These other hash…slingers around here look the part。 Aside from that; about the only thing they know how to do is roll a souse; but you're different。〃

〃Yes;〃 said Jimmy; 〃I am different。  My abilities are limited。  All I can do is wait on table; while they have two accomplishments。〃

〃Oh; you don't have to tell me;〃 said the girl。  〃I wasn't rubbering。  I was just sort of interested in you。〃

〃Thanks;〃 said Jimmy。

She went on with her breakfast while Jimmy set up an adjoining table。  Presently when he came to fill her water…glass she looked up at him again。

〃I like you; kid;〃 she said。  〃You're not fresh。  You know what I am as well as the rest of them; but you wait on me just the same as you would on〃she hesitated and there was a little catch in her voice as she finished her sentence〃just the same as you would on a decent girl。〃

Jimmy looked at her in surprise。  It was the first indication that he had ever had from an habitu; of Feinheimer's that there might lurk within their breasts any of the finer characteristics whose outward indices are pride and shame。 He was momentarily at a loss as to what to say; and as he hesitated the girl's gaze went past him and she exclaimed:

〃Look who's here!〃

Jimmy turned to look at the newcomer; and saw the Lizard directly behind him。

〃Howdy; bo;〃 said his benefactor。  〃I thought I'd come in 
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