按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
and large good…humoured mouth。 They were as like as two peas； only
that one was half an inch taller than the other； and there was no
difficulty in discovering； at a moment's glance； that they were the
children of that over…heated matron who was feeling the web of my
friend's cloth。
But the principal figure was she who held the centre place in the
group。 She was tall and thin； with fierce…looking eyes； rendered
more fierce by the spectacles which she wore； with a red nose as I
said before； and about her an undescribable something which quite
convinced me that she had never knowncould never knowaught of
the comforts of married life。 It was she who held the scissors and
the black garments。 It was she who had given that unkind cut。 As I
looked at her she whisked herself quickly round from one companion
to the other； triumphing in what she had done； and ready to triumph
further in what she was about to do。 I immediately conceived a deep
hatred for that Queen of the Harpies。
〃Well； I suppose they can't be wanted again；〃 said the mother；
rubbing her forehead。
〃Oh dear no！〃 said she of the red nose。 〃They are relics！〃 I
thought to leap forth； but for what purpose should I have leaped？
The accursed scissors had already done their work； and the symmetry；
nay； even the utility of the vestment was destroyed。
〃General Chasse wore a very good article；I will say that for him；〃
continued the mother。
〃Of course he did！〃 said the Queen Harpy。 〃Why should he not；
seeing that the country paid for it for him？ Well； ladies； who's
for having a bit？〃
〃Oh my！ you won't go for to cut them up；〃 said the stout back。
〃Won't I；〃 said the scissors； and she immediately made another
incision。 〃Who's for having a bit？ Don't all speak at once。〃
〃I should like a morsel for a pincushion；〃 said flaxen…haired Miss
No。 1； a young lady about nineteen； actuated by a general affection
for all sword…bearing； fire…eating heroes。 〃I should like to have
something to make me think of the poor general！〃
Snip； snip went the scissors with professional rapidity； and a round
piece was extracted from the back of the calf of the left leg。 I
shuddered with horror； and so did the Rev。 Augustus Horne with cold。
〃I hardly think it's proper to cut them up；〃 said Miss No。 2。
〃Oh isn't it？〃 said the harpy。 〃Then I'll do what's improper！〃 And
she got her finger and thumb well through the holes in the scissors'
handles。 As she spoke resolution was plainly marked on her brow。
〃Well； if they are to be cut up； I should certainly like a bit for a
pen…wiper；〃 said No。 2。 No。 2 was a literary young lady with a
periodical correspondence； a journal； and an album。 Snip； snip went
the scissors again； and the broad part of the upper right division
afforded ample materials for a pen…wiper。
Then the lady with the back； seeing that the desecration of the
article had been completed； plucked up heart of courage and put in
her little request； 〃I think I might have a needle…case out of it；〃
said she； 〃just as a suvneer of the poor general〃and a long
fragment cut rapidly out of the waistband afforded her unqualified
delight。
Mamma； with the hot face and untidy hair； came next。 〃Well； girls；〃
she said； 〃as you are all served； I don't see why I'm to be left
out。 Perhaps； Miss Grogram〃she was an old maid； you see
〃perhaps； Miss Grogram； you could get me as much as would make a
decent…sized reticule。〃
There was not the slightest difficulty in doing this。 The harpy in
the centre again went to work； snip； snip； and extracting from that
portion of the affairs which usually sustained the greater portion
of Mr。 Horne's weight two large round pieces of cloth； presented
them to the well…pleased matron。 〃The general knew well where to
get a bit of good broadcloth； certainly；〃 said she； again feeling
the pieces。
〃And now for No。 1；〃 said she whom I so absolutely hated； 〃I think
there is still enough for a pair of slippers。 There's nothing so
nice for the house as good black cloth slippers that are warm to the
feet and don't show the dirt。〃 And so saying； she spread out on the
floor the lacerated remainders。
〃There's a nice bit there；〃 said young lady No。 2； poking at one of
the pockets with the end of her parasol。
〃Yes；〃 said the harpy； contemplating her plunder。 〃But I'm thinking
whether I couldn't get leggings as well。 I always wear leggings in
the thick of the winter。〃 And so she concluded her operations； and
there was nothing left but a melancholy skeleton of seams and
buttons。
All this having been achieved； they pocketed their plunder and
prepared to depart。 There are people who have a wonderful appetite
for relics。 A stone with which Washington had broken a window when
a boywith which he had done so or had not； for there is little
difference； a button that was on a coat of Napoleon's； or on that of
one of his lackeys； a bullet said to have been picked up at Waterloo
or Bunker's Hill； these； and suchlike things are great treasures。
And their most desirable characteristic is the ease with which they
are attained。 Any bullet or any button does the work。 Faith alone
is necessary。 And now these ladies had made themselves happy and
glorious with 〃Relics〃 of General Chasse cut from the ill…used
habiliments of an elderly English gentleman！
They departed at last； and Mr。 Horne； for once in an ill humour；
followed me into the bedroom。 Here I must be excused if I draw a
veil over his manly sorrow at discovering what fate had done for
him。 Remember what was his position； unclothed in the Castle of
Antwerp！ The nearest suitable change for those which had been
destroyed was locked up in his portmanteau at the Hotel de Belle Rue
in Brussels！ He had nothing left to himliterally nothing； in that
Antwerp world。 There was no other wretched being wandering then in
that Dutch town so utterly denuded of the goods of life。 For what
is a man fit；for what can he be fit；when left in such a
position？ There are some evils which seem utterly to crush a man；
and if there be any misfortune to which a man may be allowed to
succumb without imputation on his manliness； surely it is such as
this。 How was Mr。 Horne to return to his hotel without incurring
the displeasure of the municipality？ That was my first thought。
He had a cloak； but it was at the inn； and I found that my friend
was oppressed with a great horror at the idea of being left alone；
so that I could not go in search of it。 There is an old saying；
that no man is a hero to his valet de chambre； the reason doubtless
being this； that it is customary for his valet to see the hero
divested of those trappings in which so much of the heroic consists。
Who reverences a clergyman without his gown； or a warrior without
his sword and sabre…tasche？ What would even Minerva be without her
helmet？
I do not wish it to be understood that I no longer reverenced Mr。
Horne because he was in an undress； but he himself certainly lost
much of his composed； well…sustained dignity of demeanour。 He was
fearful and querulous； cold； and rather cross。 When； forgetting his
size； I offered him my own； he thought that I