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achievement of this feat with some impatience； “allow me to
present to you Mrs Bounderby。”
“Oh！” said Mrs Gradgrind； “so you have settled it！ Well； I’m
sure I hope your health may be good； Louisa； for if your head
begins to split as soon as you are married； which was the case with
mine； I cannot consider that you are to be envied； though I have
no doubt you think you are； as all girls do。 However； I give you joy；
my dear—and I hope you may now turn all your ological studies to
good account； I am sure I do！ I must give you a kiss of
congratulation； Louisa； but don’t touch my right shoulder； for
there’s something running down it all day long。 And now； you
see；” whimpered Mrs Gradgrind； adjusting her shawls after the
affectionate ceremony； “I shall be worrying myself； morning； noon；
and night； to know what I am to call him！”
“Mrs Gradgrind；” said her husband； solemnly； “what do you
mean？”
“Whatever I am to call him； Mr Gradgrind； when he is married
to Louisa！ I must call him something。 It’s impossible；” said Mrs
Gradgrind； with a mingled sense of politeness and injury； “to be
constantly addressing him and never giving him a name。 I cannot
call him Josiah； for the name is insupportable to me。 You yourself
wouldn’t hear of Joe； you very well know。 Am I to call my own son…
in…law； Mister。 Not； I believe； unless the time has arrived when； as
an invalid； I am to be trampled upon by my relations。 Then； what
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am I to call him！”
Nobody present having any suggestion to offer in the
remarkable emergency； Mrs Gradgrind departed this life for the
time being； after delivering the following codicil to her remarks
already executed：
“As to the wedding； all I ask； Louisa； is；—and I ask it with a
fluttering in my chest； which actually extends to the soles of my
feet；—that it may take place soon。 Otherwise； I know it is one of
those subjects I shall never hear the last of。”
When Mr Gradgrind had presented Mrs Bounderby； Sissy had
suddenly turned her head； and looked； in wonder； in pity； in
sorrow； in doubt； in a multitude of emotions； towards Louisa。
Louisa had known it； and seen it； without looking at her。 From
that moment she was impassive； proud； and cold—held Sissy at a
distance—changed to her altogether。
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Hard Times 136
Chapter 16
Husband And Wife
r Bounderby’s first disquietude on hearing of his
happiness； was occasioned by the necessity of
M
imparting it to Mrs Sparsit。 He could not make up his
mind how to do that； or what the consequences of the step might
be。 Whether she would instantly depart； bag and baggage； to Lady
Scadgers； or would positively refuse to budge from the premises；
whether she would be plaintive or abusive； tearful or tearing；
whether she would break her heart； or break the looking…glass； Mr
Bounderby could not at all foresee。 However； as it must be done；
he had no choice but to do it； so； after attempting several letters；
and failing in them all； he resolved to do it by word of mouth。
On his way home； on the evening he set aside for this
momentous purpose； he took the precaution of stepping into a
chemist’s shop and buying a bottle of the very strongest smelling…
salts。 “By George！” said Mr Bounderby； “if she takes it in the
fainting way； I’ll have the skin off her nose； at all events！” But； in
spite of being thus forearmed； he entered his own house with
anything but a courageous air； and appeared before the object of
his misgivings； like a dog who was conscious of coming direct from
the pantry。
“Good evening； Mr Bounderby！”
“Good evening； ma’am； good evening。” He drew up his chair；
and Mrs Sparsit drew back hers as who should say； “Your fireside；
sir。 I freely admit it。 It is for you to occupy it all； if you think
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Hard Times 137
proper。”
“Don’t go to the North Pole； ma’am！” said Mr Bounderby。
“Thank you； sir；” said Mrs Sparsit； and returned； though short
of her former position。
Mr Bounderby sat looking at her； as； with the points of a stiff；
sharp pair of scissors； she picked out holes for some inscrutable
ornamental purpose； in a piece of cambric。 An operation which；
taken in connection with the bushy eyebrows and the Roman
nose； suggested with some liveliness the idea of a hawk engaged
upon the eyes of a tough little bird。 She was so steadfastly
occupied； that many minutes elapsed before she looked up from
her work： when she did so； Mr Bounderby bespoke her attention
with hitch of his head。
“Mrs Sparsit ma’am；” said Mr Bounderby； putting his hands in
his pockets； and assuring himself with his right hand that the cork
of the little bottle was ready for use； “I have no occasion to say to
you； that you are not only a lady born and bred； but a devilish
sensible woman。”
“Sir；” returned the lady； “this is indeed not the first time that
you have honoured me with similar expressions of your good
opinion。”
“Mrs Sparsit ma’am；” said Mr Bounderby； “I am going to
astonish you。”
“Yes。 sir？” returned Mrs Sparsit； interrogatively； and in the
most tranquil manner possible。 She generally wore mittens； and
she now laid down her work； and smoothed those mittens。
“I am going； ma’am；” said Bounderby； “to marry Tom
Gradgrind’s daughter。”
“Yes； sir？” returned Mrs Sparsit。 “I hope you may be happy； Mr