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Joseph still continued a huge clattering at the poker
and tongs； puffing and blowing the while； and turning
as red as his yellow face would allow him。 〃I can't
make you such handsome presents； Joseph；〃 continued
his sister； 〃but while I was at school； I have embroidered
for you a very beautiful pair of braces。〃
〃Good Gad！ Amelia；〃 cried the brother； in serious
alarm； 〃what do you mean？〃 and plunging with all his
might at the bell…rope； that article of furniture came
away in his hand； and increased the honest fellow's
confusion。 〃For heaven's sake see if my buggy's at the
door。 I CAN'T wait。 I must go。 D that groom of mine。
I must go。〃
At this minute the father of the family walked in；
rattling his seals like a true British merchant。 〃What's
the matter； Emmy？〃 says he。
〃Joseph wants me to see if hishis buggy is at the
door。 What is a buggy； Papa？〃
〃It is a one…horse palanquin；〃 said the old gentleman；
who was a wag in his way。
Joseph at this burst out into a wild fit of laughter；
in which； encountering the eye of Miss Sharp； he stopped
all of a sudden； as if he had been shot。
〃This young lady is your friend？ Miss Sharp； I am
very happy to see you。 Have you and Emmy been
quarrelling already with Joseph； that he wants to be off？〃
〃I promised Bonamy of our service； sir；〃 said Joseph；
〃to dine with him。〃
〃O fie！ didn't you tell your mother you would dine
here？〃
〃But in this dress it's impossible。〃
〃Look at him； isn't he handsome enough to dine
anywhere； Miss Sharp？〃
On which； of course； Miss Sharp looked at her friend；
and they both set off in a fit of laughter； highly
agreeable to the old gentleman。
〃Did you ever see a pair of buckskins like those at
Miss Pinkerton's？〃 continued he； following up his
advantage。
〃Gracious heavens！ Father；〃 cried Joseph。
〃There now； I have hurt his feelings。 Mrs。 Sedley；
my dear； I have hurt your son's feelings。 I have alluded
to his buckskins。 Ask Miss Sharp if I haven't？ Come；
Joseph； be friends with Miss Sharp； and let us all go to
dinner。〃
〃There's a pillau； Joseph； just as you like it； and Papa
has brought home the best turbot in Billingsgate。〃
〃Come； come； sir； walk downstairs with Miss Sharp；
and I will follow with these two young women；〃 said
the father； and he took an arm of wife and daughter
and walked merrily off。
If Miss Rebecca Sharp had determined in her heart
upon making the conquest of this big beau； I don't
think； ladies； we have any right to blame her； for though
the task of husband…hunting is generally； and with
becoming modesty； entrusted by young persons to their
mammas； recollect that Miss Sharp had no kind parent
to arrange these delicate matters for her； and that if
she did not get a husband for herself； there was no one
else in the wide world who would take the trouble off
her hands。 What causes young people to 〃come out；〃
but the noble ambition of matrimony？ What sends them
trooping to watering…places？ What keeps them dancing
till five o'clock in the morning through a whole mortal
season？ What causes them to labour at pianoforte sonatas；
and to learn four songs from a fashionable master at a
guinea a lesson； and to play the harp if they have
handsome arms and neat elbows； and to wear Lincoln
Green toxophilite hats and feathers； but that they may bring
down some 〃desirable〃 young man with those killing bows
and arrows of theirs？ What causes respectable parents
to take up their carpets； set their houses topsy…turvy； and
spend a fifth of their year's income in ball suppers and
iced champagne？ Is it sheer love of their species； and
an unadulterated wish to see young people happy and
dancing？ Psha！ they want to marry their daughters； and；
as honest Mrs。 Sedley has； in the depths of her kind
heart； already arranged a score of little schemes for the
settlement of her Amelia； so also had our beloved but
unprotected Rebecca determined to do her very best to
secure the husband； who was even more necessary for
her than for her friend。 She had a vivid imagination； she
had； besides； read the Arabian Nights and Guthrie's
Geography； and it is a fact that while she was dressing for
dinner； and after she had asked Amelia whether her
brother was very rich； she had built for herself a most
magnificent castle in the air； of which she was mistress；
with a husband somewhere in the background （she had
not seen him as yet； and his figure would not therefore
be very distinct）； she had arrayed herself in an infinity
of shawls； turbans； and diamond necklaces； and had
mounted upon an elephant to the sound of the march in
Bluebeard； in order to pay a visit of ceremony to the
Grand Mogul。 Charming Alnaschar visions！ it is the
happy privilege of youth to construct you； and many
a fanciful young creature besides Rebecca Sharp has
indulged in these delightful day…dreams ere now！
Joseph Sedley was twelve years older than his sister
Amelia。 He was in the East India Company's Civil
Service； and his name appeared； at the period of which
we write； in the Bengal division of the East India Register；
as collector of Boggley Wollah； an honourable and
lucrative post； as everybody knows： in order to know
to what higher posts Joseph rose in the service； the
reader is referred to the same periodical。
Boggley Wollah is situated in a fine； lonely； marshy；
jungly district； famous for snipe…shooting； and where
not unfrequently you may flush a tiger。 Ramgunge； where
there is a magistrate； is only forty miles off； and there
is a cavalry station about thirty miles farther； so Joseph
wrote home to his parents； when he took possession of
his collectorship。 He had lived for about eight years of
his life； quite alone； at this charming place； scarcely
seeing a Christian face except twice a year； when the
detachment arrived to carry off the revenues which he
had collected； to Calcutta。
Luckily； at this time he caught a liver complaint； for
the cure of which he returned to Europe； and which
was the source of great comfort and amusement to him
in his native country。 He did not live with his family
while in London； but had lodgings of his own； like
a gay young bachelor。 Before he went to India he was
too young to partake of the delightful pleasures of a
man about town； and plunged into them on his return
with considerable assiduity。 He drove his horses in the
Park； he dined at the fashionable taverns （for the
Oriental Club was not as yet invented）； he frequented
the theatres； as the mode was in those days； or made
his appearance at the opera； laboriously attired in tights
and a cocked hat。
On returning to India； and ever after； he used to talk
of the pleasure of this period of his existence with great
enthusiasm； and give you to understand that he and
Brummel were the leading bucks of the day。 But he was
as lonely here as in his jungle at Boggley Wollah。 He
scarcely knew a single soul in the metropolis： and were
it not for his doctor； and the society of his blue…pill；
and his liver complaint； he must have died of loneliness。
He was lazy； peevish； and a bon…vivan； the appearance
of a lady frightened him beyond measure； hence it was
but seldom that he joined the paternal circle in R