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and things； there's a good fellow。〃 And so while he paired
off with Miss Sedley； and Jos squeezed through the gate
into the gardens with Rebecca at his side； honest Dobbin
contented himself by giving an arm to the shawls； and by
paying at the door for the whole party。
He walked very modestly behind them。 He was not
willing to spoil sport。 About Rebecca and Jos he did not
care a fig。 But he thought Amelia worthy even of the
brilliant George Osborne； and as he saw that good…looking
couple threading the walks to the girl's delight and
wonder； he watched her artless happiness with a sort of
fatherly pleasure。 Perhaps he felt that he would have liked
to have something on his own arm besides a shawl （the
people laughed at seeing the gawky young officer carrying
this female burthen）； but William Dobbin was very little
addicted to selfish calculation at all； and so long as his
friend was enjoying himself； how should he be discontented？
And the truth is； that of all the delights of the
Gardens； of the hundred thousand extra lamps； which
were always lighted； the fiddlers in cocked hats； who
played ravishing melodies under the gilded cockle…shell in
the midst of the gardens； the singers； both of comic and
sentimental ballads； who charmed the ears there； the
country dances； formed by bouncing cockneys and
cockneyesses； and executed amidst jumping； thumping and
laughter； the signal which announced that Madame Saqui
was about to mount skyward on a slack…rope ascending
to the stars； the hermit that always sat in the illuminated
hermitage； the dark walks； so favourable to the interviews
of young lovers； the pots of stout handed about by the
people in the shabby old liveries； and the twinkling boxes；
in which the happy feasters made…believe to eat slices of
almost invisible hamof all these things； and of the
gentle Simpson； that kind smiling idiot； who； I daresay；
presided even then over the placeCaptain William Dobbin
did not take the slightest notice。
He carried about Amelia's white cashmere shawl； and
having attended under the gilt cockle…shell； while Mrs。
Salmon performed the Battle of Borodino （a savage
cantata against the Corsican upstart； who had lately met
with his Russian reverses）Mr。 Dobbin tried to hum it
as he walked away； and found he was hummingthe tune
which Amelia Sedley sang on the stairs； as she came
down to dinner。
He burst out laughing at himself； for the truth is； he
could sing no better than an owl。
It is to be understood； as a matter of course； that our
young people； being in parties of two and two； made the
most solemn promises to keep together during the evening；
and separated in ten minutes afterwards。 Parties at
Vauxhall always did separate； but 'twas only to meet
again at supper…time； when they could talk of their mutual
adventures in the interval。
What were the adventures of Mr。 Osborne and Miss
Amelia？ That is a secret。 But be sure of thisthey were
perfectly happy； and correct in their behaviour； and as
they had been in the habit of being together any time these
fifteen years； their tete…a…tete offered no particular
novelty。
But when Miss Rebecca Sharp and her stout companion
lost themselves in a solitary walk； in which there were not
above five score more of couples similarly straying； they
both felt that the situation was extremely tender and
critical； and now or never was the moment Miss Sharp
thought； to provoke that declaration which was trembling
on the timid lips of Mr。 Sedley。 They had previously been
to the panorama of Moscow； where a rude fellow； treading
on Miss Sharp's foot； caused her to fall back with a little
shriek into the arms of Mr。 Sedley； and this little incident
increased the tenderness and confidence of that gentleman
to such a degree； that he told her several of his favourite
Indian stories over again for； at least； the sixth time。
〃How I should like to see India！〃 said Rebecca。
〃SHOULD you？〃 said Joseph； with a most killing tenderness；
and was no doubt about to follow up this artful
interrogatory by a question still more tender （for he puffed
and panted a great deal； and Rebecca's hand； which was
placed near his heart； could count the feverish pulsations
of that organ）； when； oh； provoking！ the bell rang for the
fireworks； and； a great scuffling and running taking place；
these interesting lovers were obliged to follow in the
stream of people。
Captain Dobbin had some thoughts of joining the party
at supper： as； in truth； he found the Vauxhall
amusements not particularly livelybut he paraded
twice before the box where the now united couples were
met； and nobody took any notice of him。 Covers were laid for
four。 The mated pairs were prattling away quite happily；
and Dobbin knew he was as clean forgotten as if he had
never existed in this world。
〃I should only be de trop；〃 said the Captain； looking at
them rather wistfully。 〃I'd best go and talk to the hermit；〃
and so he strolled off out of the hum of men； and noise；
and clatter of the banquet； into the dark walk； at the end
of which lived that well…known pasteboard Solitary。 It
wasn't very good fun for Dobbinand； indeed； to be
alone at Vauxhall； I have found； from my own experience；
to be one of the most dismal sports ever entered into by a
bachelor。
The two couples were perfectly happy then in their
box： where the most delightful and intimate conversation
took place。 Jos was in his glory； ordering about the waiters
with great majesty。 He made the salad； and uncorked
the Champagne； and carved the chickens； and ate and
drank the greater part of the refreshments on the tables。
Finally； he insisted upon having a bowl of rack punch；
everybody had rack punch at Vauxhall。 〃Waiter； rack
punch。〃
That bowl of rack punch was the cause of all this
history。 And why not a bowl of rack punch as well as any
other cause？ Was not a bowl of prussic acid the cause of
Fair Rosamond's retiring from the world？ Was not a bowl
of wine the cause of the demise of Alexander the Great；
or； at least； does not Dr。 Lempriere say so？so did this
bowl of rack punch influence the fates of all the principal
characters in this 〃Novel without a Hero；〃 which we are
now relating。 It influenced their life； although most of
them did not taste a drop of it。
The young ladies did not drink it； Osborne did not
like it； and the consequence was that Jos； that fat
gourmand； drank up the whole contents of the bowl；
and the consequence of his drinking up the whole contents
of the bowl was a liveliness which at first was astonishing；
and then became almost painful； for he talked and laughed so
loud as to bring scores of listeners round the box； much
to the confusion of the innocent party within it； and；
volunteering to sing a song （which he did in that maudlin
high key peculiar to gentlemen in an inebriated state）； he
almost drew away the audience who were gathered round
the musicians in the gilt scollop…shell； and received from
his hearers a great deal of applause。
〃Brayvo； Fat un！〃 said one； 〃Angcore； Daniel Lambert！〃
said another； 〃What a figure for the tight…rope！〃
exclaimed another wag； to the inexpressible alarm of
the ladies； and the grea