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I was not to be an artist； and I am rather glad that I was hindered； for I had even stronger in… clinations in other directions； and art； really noble art； requires the entire devotion of a lifetime。
I seldom thought seriously of becoming an author； although it seemed to me that anybody who had written a book would have a right to feel very proud。 But I believed that a person must be exceedingly wise before presuming to attempt it： although now and then I thought I could feel ideas growing in my mind that it might be worth while to put into a book；if I lived and studied until I was forty or fifty years old。
I wrote my little verses； to be sure； but that was nothing； they just grew。 They were the same as breathing or singing。 I could not help writing them； and I thought and dreamed a great many that were ever put on paper。 They seemed to fly into my mind and away again； like birds with a carol through the air。 It seemed strange to me that people should notice them； or should think my writing verses anything peculiar； for I supposed that they were in everybody's mind； just as they were in mine； and that anybody could write them who chose。
One day I heard a relative say to my mother；
〃Keep what she writes till she grows up； and perhaps she will get money for it。 I have heard of somebody who earned a thousand dollars by writing poetry。〃
It sounded so absurd to me。 Money for writing verses！ One dollar would be as ridiculous as a thousand。 I should as soon have thought of being paid for thinking！ My mother； fortunately； was sensible enough never to flatter me or let me be flattered about my scribbling。 It never was allowed to hinder any work I had to do。 I crept away into a corner to write what came into my head； just as I ran away to play； and I looked upon it only as my most agreeable amusement； never thinking of preserving anything which did not of itself stay in my memory。 This too was well； for the time did lot come when I could afford to look upon verse… writing as an occupation。 Through my life； it has only been permitted to me as an aside from other more pressing employments。 Whether I should have written better verses had circumstances left me free to do what I chose； it is impossible now to know。
All my thoughts about my future sent me back to Aunt Hannah and my first infantile idea of being a teacher。 I foresaw that I should be that before I could be or do any thing else。 It had been impressed upon me that I must make myself useful in the world； and certainly one could be useful who could 〃keep school〃 as Aunt Hannah did。 I did not see anything else for a girl to do who wanted to use her brains as well as her hands。 So the plan of preparing myself to be a teacher gradually and almost uncon… sciously shaped itself in my mind as the only practicable one。 I could earn my living in that way；all…important consideration。
I liked the thought of self…support； but I would have chosen some artistic or beautiful work if I could。 I had no especial aptitude for teaching； and no absorbing wish to be a teacher； but it seemed to me that I might succeed if I tried。 What I did like about it was that one must know something first。 I must acquire knowledge before I could impart it； and that was just what I wanted。 I could be a student； wherever I was and whatever else I had to be or do； and I would！
I knew I should write； I could not help doing that； for my hand seemed instinctively to move towards pen and paper in moments of leisure。 But to write anything worth while； I must have mental cultivation； so； in preparing myself to teach； I could also be preparing myself to write。
This was the plan that indefinitely shaped itself in my mind as I returned to my work in the spinning…room； and which I followed out； not without many breaks and hindrances and neglects； during the next six or seven years；to learn all I could； so that I should be fit to teach or to write； as the way opened。 And it turned out that fifteen or twenty of my best years were given to teaching。
VIII。
BY THE RIVER。
IT did not take us younger ones long to get acquainted with our new home； and to love it。
To live beside a river had been to me a child's dream of romance。 Rivers； as I pictured them； came down from the mountains； and were born in the clouds。 They were bordered by green meadows； and graceful trees leaned over to gaze into their bright mirrors。 Our shallow tidal creek was the only river I had known； except as visioned on the pages of the 〃Pilgrim's Progress；〃 and in the Book of Revelation。 And the Merrimack was like a continuation of that dream。
I soon made myself familiar with the rocky nooks along Pawtucket Falls； shaded with hemlocks and white birches。 Strange new wild flowers grew beside the rushing waters； among them Sir Walter Scott's own harebells； which I had never thought of except as blossoms of poetry； here they were； as real to me as to his Lady of the Lake！ I loved the harebell； the first new flower the river gave me； as I had never loved a flower before。
There was but one summers holiday for us who worked in the mills the Fourth of July。 We made a point of spending it out of doors； making excursions down the river to watch the meeting of the slow Concord and the swift Merrimack； or around by the old canal…path； to explore the mysteries of the Guard Locks； or across the bridge； clambering up Dracut Heights； to look away to the dim blue mountains。
On that morning it was our custom to wake one another at four o'clock； and start off on a tramp together over some retired road whose chief charm was its unfamiliarity； returning to a very late breakfast； with draggled gowns and aprons full of dewy wild roses。 No matter if we must get up at five the next morning and go back to our hum…drum toil； we should have the roses to take with us for company； and the sweet air of the woodland which lingered about them would scent our thoughts all day； and make us forget the oily smell of the machinery。
We were children still； whether at school or at work； and Nature still held us close to her motherly heart。 Nature came very close to the mill…gates； too； in those days。 There was green grass all around them； violets and wild geraniums grew by the canals； and long stretches of open land between the corporation buildings and the street made the town seem country…like。
The slope behind our mills （the 〃Lawrence〃 Mills） was a green lawn； and in front of some of them the overseers had gay flower… gardens； we passed in to our work through a splendor of dahlias and hollyhocks。
The gray stone walls of St。 Anne's church and rectory made a picturesque spot in the middle of the town； remaining still as a lasting monument to the religious purpose which animated the first manufacturers。 The church arose close to the oldest corporation （the 〃Merrimack〃）； and seemed a part of it； and a part； also； of the original idea of the place itself； which was always a city of worshipers； although it came to be filled with a population which preferred meeting…houses to churches。 I admired the church greatly。 I had never before seen a real one； never anything but a plain frame meeting…house； and it and its benign； apostolic…looking rector were like