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david copperfield(大卫.科波维尔)-第21章

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no more。 

I felt apprehensive that I was personally interested in this 
dialogue; and sought Mr。 Murdstone’s eye as it lighted on mine。 

Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics 


David Copperfield 

‘Now; David;’ he said—and I saw that cast again as he said it— 
‘you must be far more careful today than usual。’ He gave the cane 
another poise; and another switch; and having finished his 
preparation of it; laid it down beside him; with an impressive look; 
and took up his book。 

This was a good freshener to my presence of mind; as a 
beginning。 I felt the words of my lessons slipping off; not one by 
one; or line by line; but by the entire page; I tried to lay hold of 
them; but they seemed; if I may so express it; to have put skates 
on; and to skim away from me with a smoothness there was no 
checking。 

We began badly; and went on worse。 I had come in with an idea 
of distinguishing myself rather; conceiving that I was very well 
prepared; but it turned out to be quite a mistake。 Book after book 
was added to the heap of failures; Miss Murdstone being firmly 
watchful of us all the time。 And when we came at last to the five 
thousand cheeses (canes he made it that day; I remember); my 
mother burst out crying。 

‘Clara!’ said Miss Murdstone; in her warning voice。 

‘I am not quite well; my dear Jane; I think;’ said my mother。 

I saw him wink; solemnly; at his sister; as he rose and said; 
taking up the cane: 

‘Why; Jane; we can hardly expect Clara to bear; with perfect 
firmness; the worry and torment that David has occasioned her 
today。 That would be stoical。 Clara is greatly strengthened and 
improved; but we can hardly expect so much from her。 David; you 
and I will go upstairs; boy。’ 

As he took me out at the door; my mother ran towards us。 Miss 
Murdstone said; ‘Clara! are you a perfect fool?’ and interfered。 I 

Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics 


David Copperfield 

saw my mother stop her ears then; and I heard her crying。 

He walked me up to my room slowly and gravely—I am certain 
he had a delight in that formal parade of executing justice—and 
when we got there; suddenly twisted my head under his arm。 

‘Mr。 Murdstone! Sir!’ I cried to him。 ‘Don’t! Pray don’t beat me! 
I have tried to learn; sir; but I can’t learn while you and Miss 
Murdstone are by。 I can’t indeed!’ 

‘Can’t you; indeed; David?’ he said。 ‘We’ll try that。’ 

He had my head as in a vice; but I twined round him somehow; 
and stopped him for a moment; entreating him not to beat me。 It 
was only a moment that I stopped him; for he cut me heavily an 
instant afterwards; and in the same instant I caught the hand with 
which he held me in my mouth; between my teeth; and bit it 
through。 It sets my teeth on edge to think of it。 

He beat me then; as if he would have beaten me to death。 Above 
all the noise we made; I heard them running up the stairs; and 
crying out—I heard my mother crying out—and Peggotty。 Then he 
was gone; and the door was locked outside; and I was lying; 
fevered and hot; and torn; and sore; and raging in my puny way; 
upon the floor。 

How well I recollect; when I became quiet; what an unnatural 
stillness seemed to reign through the whole house! How well I 
remember; when my smart and passion began to cool; how wicked 
I began to feel! 

I sat listening for a long while; but there was not a sound。 I 
crawled up from the floor; and saw my face in the glass; so 
swollen; red; and ugly that it almost frightened me。 My stripes 
were sore and stiff; and made me cry afresh; when I moved; but 
they were nothing to the guilt I felt。 It lay heavier on my breast 

Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics 


David Copperfield 

than if I had been a most atrocious criminal; I dare say。 

It had begun to grow dark; and I had shut the window (I had 
been lying; for the most part; with my head upon the sill; by turns 
crying; dozing; and looking listlessly out); when the key was 
turned; and Miss Murdstone came in with some bread and meat; 
and milk。 These she put down upon the table without a word; 
glaring at me the while with exemplary firmness; and then retired; 
locking the door after her。 

Long after it was dark I sat there; wondering whether anybody 
else would come。 When this appeared improbable for that night; I 
undressed; and went to bed; and; there; I began to wonder 
fearfully what would be done to me。 Whether it was a criminal act 
that I had committed? Whether I should be taken into custody; 
and sent to prison? Whether I was at all in danger of being 
hanged? 

I never shall forget the waking; next morning; the being 
cheerful and fresh for the first moment; and then the being 
weighed down by the stale and dismal oppression of 
remembrance。 Miss Murdstone reappeared before I was out of 
bed; told me; in so many words; that I was free to walk in the 
garden for half an hour and no longer; and retired; leaving the 
door open; that I might avail myself of that permission。 

I did so; and did so every morning of my imprisonment; which 
lasted five days。 If I could have seen my mother alone; I should 
have gone down on my knees to her and besought her forgiveness; 
but I saw no one; Miss Murdstone excepted; during the whole 
time—except at evening prayers in the parlour; to which I was 
escorted by Miss Murdstone after everybody else was placed; 
where I was stationed; a young outlaw; all alone by myself near the 

Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics 


David Copperfield 

door; and whence I was solemnly conducted by my jailer; before 
any one arose from the devotional posture。 I only observed that 
my mother was as far off from me as she could be; and kept her 
face another way so that I never saw it; and that Mr。 Murdstone’s 
hand was bound up in a large linen wrapper。 

The length of those five days I can convey no idea of to any one。 
They occupy the place of years in my remembrance。 The way in 
which I listened to all the incidents of the house that made 
themselves audible to me; the ringing of bells; the opening and 
shutting of doors; the murmuring of voices; the footsteps on the 
stairs; to any laughing; whistling; or singing; outside; which 
seemed more dismal than anything else to me in my solitude and 
disgrace—the uncertain pace of the hours; especially at night; 
when I would wake thinking it was morning; and find that the 
family were not yet gone to bed; and that all the length of night 
had yet to come—the depressed dreams and nightmares I had— 
the return of day; noon; afternoon; evening; when the boys played 
in the churchyard; and I watched them from a distance within the 
room; being ashamed to show myself at the window lest they 
should know I was a prisoner—the strange sensation of never 
hearing myself speak—the fleeting intervals of something like 
cheerfulness; which came with eating and drinking; and went 
away with it—the setting in of rain one evening; with a fresh smell; 
and its coming down faster and faster between me and the church; 
until it and gathering night seemed to quench me in gloom; and 
fear; and rem
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