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one； and I umbly ask for bumpers； seeing I intend to make it the
divinest of her sex。’
Her father had his empty glass in his hand。 I saw him set it
down； look at the picture she was so like； put his hand to his
forehead； and shrink back in his elbow…chair。
‘I’m an umble individual to give you her elth；’ proceeded Uriah；
‘but I admire—adore her。’
No physical pain that her father’s grey head could have borne； I
think； could have been more terrible to me； than the mental
endurance I saw compressed now within both his hands。
‘Agnes；’ said Uriah； either not regarding him； or not knowing
what the nature of his action was； ‘Agnes Wickfield is； I am safe to
say； the divinest of her sex。 May I speak out； among friends？ To be
her father is a proud distinction； but to be her usband—’
Spare me from ever again hearing such a cry； as that with
which her father rose up from the table！ ‘What’s the matter？’ said
Uriah； turning of a deadly colour。 ‘You are not gone mad； after all；
Mr。 Wickfield； I hope？ If I say I’ve an ambition to make your
Agnes my Agnes； I have as good a right to it as another man。 I
have a better right to it than any other man！’
I had my arms round Mr。 Wickfield； imploring him by
everything that I could think of； oftenest of all by his love for
Agnes； to calm himself a little。 He was mad for the moment；
tearing out his hair； beating his head； trying to force me from him；
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
and to force himself from me； not answering a word； not looking at
or seeing anyone； blindly striving for he knew not what； his face all
staring and distorted—a frightful spectacle。
I conjured him； incoherently； but in the most impassioned
manner； not to abandon himself to this wildness； but to hear me。 I
besought him to think of Agnes； to connect me with Agnes； to
recollect how Agnes and I had grown up together； how I honoured
her and loved her； how she was his pride and joy。 I tried to bring
her idea before him in any form； I even reproached him with not
having firmness to spare her the knowledge of such a scene as
this。 I may have effected something； or his wildness may have
spent itself； but by degrees he struggled less； and began to look at
me—strangely at first； then with recognition in his eyes。 At length
he said； ‘I know； Trotwood！ My darling child and you—I know！
But look at him！’
He pointed to Uriah； pale and glowering in a corner； evidently
very much out in his calculations； and taken by surprise。
‘Look at my torturer；’ he replied。 ‘Before him I have step by
step abandoned name and reputation； peace and quiet； house and
home。’
‘I have kept your name and reputation for you； and your peace
and quiet； and your house and home too；’ said Uriah； with a sulky；
hurried； defeated air of compromise。 ‘Don’t be foolish； Mr。
Wickfield。 If I have gone a little beyond what you were prepared
for； I can go back； I suppose？ There’s no harm done。’
‘I looked for single motives in everyone；’ said Mr。 Wickfield； and
I was satisfied I had bound him to me by motives of interest。 But
see what he is—oh； see what he is！’
‘You had better stop him； Copperfield； if you can；’ cried Uriah；
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
with his long forefinger pointing towards me。 ‘He’ll say something
presently—mind you！—he’ll be sorry to have said afterwards； and
you’ll be sorry to have heard！’
‘I’ll say anything！’ cried Mr。 Wickfield； with a desperate air。
‘Why should I not be in all the world’s power if I am in yours？’
‘Mind！ I tell you！’ said Uriah； continuing to warn me。 ‘If you
don’t stop his mouth； you’re not his friend！ Why shouldn’t you be
in all the world’s power； Mr。 Wickfield？ Because you have got a
daughter。 You and me know what we know； don’t we？ Let
sleeping dogs lie—who wants to rouse ’em？ I don’t。 Can’t you see I
am as umble as I can be？ I tell you； if I’ve gone too far； I’m sorry。
What would you have； sir？’
‘Oh； Trotwood； Trotwood！’ exclaimed Mr。 Wickfield； wringing
his hands。 ‘What I have come down to be； since I first saw you in
this house！ I was on my downward way then； but the dreary；
dreary road I have traversed since！ Weak indulgence has ruined
me。 Indulgence in remembrance； and indulgence in forgetfulness。
My natural grief for my child’s mother turned to disease； my
natural love for my child turned to disease。 I have infected
everything I touched。 I have brought misery on what I dearly love；
I know—you know！ I thought it possible that I could truly love one
creature in the world； and not love the rest； I thought it possible
that I could truly mourn for one creature gone out of the world；
and not have some part in the grief of all who mourned。 Thus the
lessons of my life have been perverted！ I have preyed on my own
morbid coward heart； and it has preyed on me。 Sordid in my grief；
sordid in my love； sordid in my miserable escape from the darker
side of both； oh see the ruin I am； and hate me； shun me！’
He dropped into a chair； and weakly sobbed。 The excitement
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
into which he had been roused was leaving him。 Uriah came out of
his corner。
‘I don’t know all I have done； in my fatuity；’ said Mr。 Wickfield；
putting out his hands； as if to deprecate my condemnation。 ‘He
knows best；’ meaning Uriah Heep； ‘for he has always been at my
elbow； whispering me。 You see the millstone that he is about my
neck。 You find him in my house； you find him in my business。 You
heard him； but a little time ago。 What need have I to say more！’
‘You haven’t need to say so much； nor half so much； nor
anything at all；’ observed Uriah； half defiant； and half fawning。
‘You wouldn’t have took it up so； if it hadn’t been for the wine。
You’ll think better of it tomorrow； sir。 If I have said too much； or
more than I meant； what of it？ I haven’t stood by it！’
The door opened； and Agnes； gliding in； without a vestige of
colour in her face； put her arm round his neck； and steadily said；
‘Papa； you are not well。 Come with me！’
He laid his head upon her shoulder； as if he were oppressed
with heavy shame； and went out with her。 Her eyes met mine for
but an instant； yet I saw how much she knew of what had passed。
‘I didn’t expect he’d cut up so rough； Master Copperfield；’ said
Uriah。 ‘But it’s nothing。 I’ll be friends with him tomorrow。 It’s for
his good。 I’m umbly anxious for his good。’
I gave him no answer； and went upstairs into the quiet room
where Agnes had so often sat beside me at my books。 Nobody
came near me until late at night。 I took up a book； and tried to
read。 I heard the clocks strike twelve； and was still reading；
without knowing what I read； when Agnes touched me。
‘You will be going early in the morning； Trotwood！ Let us say
good…bye； now！’
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
She had been weeping； but her face then was so calm and
beautiful！