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‘I say it’s very hard I should be made so now；’ returned my
mother； pouting； ‘and it is—very hard—isn’t it？’
He drew her to him； whispered in her ear； and kissed her。 I
knew as well； when I saw my mother’s head lean down upon his
shoulder； and her arm touch his neck—I knew as well that he
could mould her pliant nature into any form he chose； as I know；
now； that he did it。
‘Go you below； my love；’ said Mr。 Murdstone。 ‘David and I will
come down； together。 My friend；’ turning a darkening face on
Peggotty； when he had watched my mother out； and dismissed her
with a nod and a smile； ‘do you know your mistress’s name？’
‘She has been my mistress a long time； sir；’ answered Peggotty；
‘I ought to know it。’
‘That’s true；’ he answered。 ‘But I thought I heard you； as I came
upstairs； address her by a name that is not hers。 She has taken
mine； you know。 Will you remember that？’
Peggotty； with some uneasy glances at me； curtseyed herself
out of the room without replying； seeing； I suppose； that she was
expected to go； and had no excuse for remaining。 When we two
were left alone； he shut the door； and sitting on a chair； and
holding me standing before him； looked steadily into my eyes。 I
felt my own attracted； no less steadily； to his。 As I recall our being
opposed thus； face to face； I seem again to hear my heart beat fast
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
and high。
‘David；’ he said； making his lips thin； by pressing them
together； ‘if I have an obstinate horse or dog to deal with； what do
you think I do？’
‘I don’t know。’
‘I beat him。’
I had answered in a kind of breathless whisper； but I felt； in my
silence； that my breath was shorter now。
‘I make him wince； and smart。 I say to myself； “I’ll conquer that
fellow”； and if it were to cost him all the blood he had； I should do
it。 What is that upon your face？’
‘Dirt；’ I said。
He knew it was the mark of tears as well as I。 But if he had
asked the question twenty times； each time with twenty blows； I
believe my baby heart would have burst before I would have told
him so。
‘You have a good deal of intelligence for a little fellow；’ he said；
with a grave smile that belonged to him； ‘and you understood me
very well； I see。 Wash that face； sir； and come down with me。’
He pointed to the washing…stand； which I had made out to be
like Mrs。 Gummidge； and motioned me with his head to obey him
directly。 I had little doubt then； and I have less doubt now； that he
would have knocked me down without the least compunction； if I
had hesitated。
‘Clara； my dear；’ he said； when I had done his bidding； and he
walked me into the parlour； with his hand still on my arm； ‘you
will not be made uncomfortable any more； I hope。 We shall soon
improve our youthful humours。’
God help me； I might have been improved for my whole life； I
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
might have been made another creature perhaps； for life； by a
kind word at that season。 A word of encouragement and
explanation； of pity for my childish ignorance； of welcome home；
of reassurance to me that it was home； might have made me
dutiful to him in my heart henceforth； instead of in my hypocritical
outside； and might have made me respect instead of hate him。 I
thought my mother was sorry to see me standing in the room so
scared and strange； and that； presently； when I stole to a chair； she
followed me with her eyes more sorrowfully still—missing；
perhaps； some freedom in my childish tread—but the word was
not spoken； and the time for it was gone。
We dined alone； we three together。 He seemed to be very fond
of my mother—I am afraid I liked him none the better for that—
and she was very fond of him。 I gathered from what they said； that
an elder sister of his was coming to stay with them； and that she
was expected that evening。 I am not certain whether I found out
then； or afterwards； that； without being actively concerned in any
business； he had some share in； or some annual charge upon the
profits of； a wine…merchant’s house in London； with which his
family had been connected from his great…grandfather’s time； and
in which his sister had a similar interest； but I may mention it in
this place； whether or no。
After dinner； when we were sitting by the fire； and I was
meditating an escape to Peggotty without having the hardihood to
slip away； lest it should offend the master of the house； a coach
drove up to the garden…gate and he went out to receive the visitor。
My mother followed him。 I was timidly following her； when she
turned round at the parlour door； in the dusk； and taking me in
her embrace as she had been used to do； whispered me to love my
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
new father and be obedient to him。 She did this hurriedly and
secretly； as if it were wrong； but tenderly； and； putting out her
hand behind her； held mine in it； until we came near to where he
was standing in the garden； where she let mine go； and drew hers
through his arm。
It was Miss Murdstone who was arrived； and a gloomy…looking
lady she was； dark； like her brother； whom she greatly resembled
in face and voice； and with very heavy eyebrows； nearly meeting
over her large nose； as if； being disabled by the wrongs of her sex
from wearing whiskers； she had carried them to that account。 She
brought with her two uncompromising hard black boxes； with her
initials on the lids in hard brass nails。 When she paid the
coachman she took her money out of a hard steel purse； and she
kept the purse in a very jail of a bag which hung upon her arm by
a heavy chain； and shut up like a bite。 I had never； at that time；
seen such a metallic lady altogether as Miss Murdstone was。
She was brought into the parlour with many tokens of welcome；
and there formally recognized my mother as a new and near
relation。 Then she looked at me； and said：
‘Is that your boy； sister…in…law？’
My mother acknowledged me。
‘Generally speaking；’ said Miss Murdstone； ‘I don’t like boys。
How d’ye do； boy？’
Under these encouraging circumstances； I replied that I was
very well； and that I hoped she was the same； with such an
indifferent grace； that Miss Murdstone disposed of me in two
words：
‘Wants manner！’
Having uttered which； with great distinctness； she begged the
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
favour of being shown to her room； which became to me from that
time forth a place of awe and dread； wherein the two black boxes
were never seen open or known to be left unlocked； and where （for
I peeped in once or twice when she was out） numerous little steel
fetters and rivets； with which Miss Murdstone embellished herself
when she was dressed； generally hung upon the looking…glass in
formidable array。
As well as I could make out； she had come for good； and had no
intention of ever going again。 She began to ‘help’ my mother next
morning； and was in and