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were the unconscious instruments of a Progress they wot not of； preserved
to the West by Marathon and Salamis。 With Caesar's legions its message
went forth across Hispania to the cliffs of the wild western ocean；
through Hercynian forests to tribes that dwelt where great rivers roll up
their bars by misty； northern seas； and even to Celtic fastnesses beyond
the Wall。。。。
IV。
In and out of my early memories like a dancing ray of sunlight flits the
spirit of Nancy。 I was always fond of her； but in extreme youth I
accepted her incense with masculine complacency and took her allegiance
for granted； never seeking to fathom the nature of the spell I exercised
over her。 Naturally other children teased me about her； but what was
worse； with that charming lack of self…consciousness and consideration
for what in after life are called the finer feelings； they teased her
about me before me； my presence deterring them not at all。 I can see
them hopping around her in the Peters yard crying out：
〃Nancy's in love with Hugh！ Nancy's in love with Hugh！〃
A sufficiently thrilling pastime； this； for Nancy could take care of
herself。 I was a bungler beside her when it came to retaliation； and not
the least of her attractions for me was her capacity for anger： fury
would be a better term。 She would fly at themeven as she flew at the
head…hunters when the Petrel was menaced； and she could run like a deer。
Woe to the unfortunate victim she overtook！ Masculine strength；
exercised apologetically； availed but little； and I have seen Russell
Peters and Gene Hollister retire from such encounters humiliated and
weeping。 She never caught Ralph； his methods of torture were more
intelligent and subtle than Gene's and Russell's； but she was his equal
when it came to a question of tongues。
〃I know what's the matter with you； Ralph Hambleton；〃 she would say。
〃You're jealous。〃 An accusation that invariably put him on the
defensive。 〃You think all the girls are in love with you； don't you？〃
These scenes I found somewhat embarrassing。 Not so Nancy。 After
discomfiting her tormenters； or wounding and scattering them； she would
return to my side。。。。 In spite of her frankly expressed preference for
me she had an elusiveness that made a continual appeal to my imagination。
She was never obvious or commonplace； and long before I began to
experience the discomforts and sufferings of youthful love I was
fascinated by a nature eloquent with contradictions and inconsistencies。
She was a tomboy； yet her own sex was enhanced rather than overwhelmed by
contact with the other： and no matter how many trees she climbed she
never seemed to lose her daintiness。 It was innate。
She could； at times； be surprisingly demure。 These impressions of her
daintiness and demureness are particularly vivid in a picture my memory
has retained of our walking together； unattended； to Susan Blackwood's
birthday party。 She must have been about twelve years old。 It was the
first time I had escorted her or any other girl to a party； Mrs。 Willett
had smiled over the proceeding； but Nancy and I took it most seriously；
as symbolic of things to come。 I can see Powell Street； where Nancy
lived； at four o'clock on a mild and cloudy December afternoon； the
decorous； retiring houses； Nancy on one side of the pavement by the iron
fences and I on the other by the tree boxes。 I can't remember her dress；
only the exquisite sense of her slimness and daintiness comes back to me；
of her dark hair in a long braid tied with a red ribbon； of her slender
legs clad in black stockings of shining silk。 We felt the occasion to be
somehow too significant； too eloquent for words。。。。
In silence we climbed the flight of stone steps that led up to the
Blackwood mansion； when suddenly the door was opened； letting out sounds
of music and revelry。 Mr。 Blackwood's coloured butler； Ned； beamed at us
hospitably； inviting us to enter the brightness within。 The shades were
drawn； the carpets were covered with festal canvas； the folding doors
between the square rooms were flung back； the prisms of the big
chandeliers flung their light over animated groups of matrons and
children。 Mrs。 Watling； the mother of the Watling twinstoo young to be
present was directing with vivacity the game of 〃King William was King
James's son；〃 and Mrs。 McAlery was playing the piano。
Now choose you East； now choose you West；
Now choose the one you love the best！〃
Tom Peters； in a velvet suit and consequently very miserable； refused to
embrace Ethel Hollister； while the scornful Julia lurked in a corner：
nothing would induce her to enter such a foolish game。 I experienced a
novel discomfiture when Ralph kissed Nancy。。。。 Afterwards came the
feast； from which Ham Durrett； in a pink paper cap with streamers； was at
length forcibly removed by his mother。 Thus early did he betray his love
for the flesh pots。。。。
It was not until I was sixteen that a player came and touched the keys of
my soul； and it awoke； bewildered； at these first tender notes。 The
music quickened； tripping in ecstasy； to change by subtle phrases into
themes of exquisite suffering hitherto unexperienced。 I knew that I
loved Nancy。
With the advent of longer dresses that reached to her shoe tops a change
had come over her。 The tomboy； the willing camp…follower who loved me
and was unashamed； were gone forever； and a mysterious； transfigured
being； neither girl nor woman； had magically been evolved。 Could it be
possible that she loved me still？ My complacency had vanished； suddenly
I had become the aggressor； if only I had known how to 〃aggress〃； but in
her presence I was seized by an accursed shyness that paralyzed my
tongue； and the things I had planned to say were left unuttered。 It was
somethingthough I did not realize itto be able to feel like that。
The time came when I could no longer keep this thing to myself。 The need
of an outlet； of a confidant； became imperative； and I sought out Tom
Peters。 It was in February； I remember because I had venturedwith
incredible daringto send Nancy an elaborate； rosy Valentine； written on
the back of it in a handwriting all too thinly disguised was the
following verse； the triumphant result of much hard thinking in school
hours：
Should you of this the sender guess
Without another sign；
Would you repent； and rest content
To be his Valentine
I grew hot and cold by turns when I thought of its possible effects on my
chances。
One of those useless； slushy afternoons； I took Tom for a walk that led
us； as dusk came on； past Nancy's house。 Only by painful degrees did I
succeed in overcoming my bashfulness； but Tom； when at last I had blurted
out the secret； was most sympathetic； although the ailment from which I
suffered was as yet outside of the realm of his experience。 I have used
the word 〃ailment〃 advisedly； since he evidently put my trouble in the
same category with diphtheria or scarlet fever； remarking that it was
〃darned hard luck。〃 In vain I sought to explain that I did not reg