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〃My father suddenly went by； and then I knew what the Scripture meant
by 'The Spirit of God passed before his face。' I had won。 I slipped
through the crowd of men who had gathered about the players with the
quickness of an eel escaping through a broken mesh in a net。 My nerves
thrilled with joy instead of anguish。 I felt like some criminal on the
way to torture released by a chance meeting with the king。 It happened
that a man with a decoration found himself short by forty francs。
Uneasy eyes suspected me； I turned pale； and drops of perspiration
stood on my forehead； I was well punished； I thought； for having
robbed my father。 Then the kind little stout man said； in a voice like
an angel's surely； 'All these gentlemen have paid their stakes；' and
put down the forty francs himself。 I raised my head in triumph upon
the players。 After I had returned the money I had taken from it to my
father's purse； I left my winnings with that honest and worthy
gentleman； who continued to win。 As soon as I found myself possessed
of a hundred and sixty francs； I wrapped them up in my handkerchief；
so that they could neither move or rattle on the way back； and I
played no more。
〃 'What were you doing at the card…table？' said my father as we
stepped into the carriage。
〃 'I was looking on；' I answered； trembling。
〃 'But it would have been nothing out of the common if you had been
prompted by self…love to put some money down on the table。 In the eyes
of men of the world you are quite old enough to assume the right to
commit such follies。 So I should have pardoned you； Raphael； if you
had made use of my purse。 。 。 。 。'
〃I did not answer。 When we reached home； I returned the keys and money
to my father。 As he entered his study； he emptied out his purse on the
mantelpiece； counted the money； and turned to me with a kindly look；
saying with more or less long and significant pauses between each
phrase：
〃 'My boy； you are very nearly twenty now。 I am satisfied with you。
You ought to have an allowance； if only to teach you how to lay it
out； and to gain some acquaintance with everyday business。
Henceforward I shall let you have a hundred francs each month。 Here is
your first quarter's income for this year；' he added； fingering a pile
of gold； as if to make sure that the amount was correct。 'Do what you
please with it。'
〃I confess that I was ready to fling myself at his feet； to tell him
that I was a thief； a scoundrel； and； worse than all； a liar！ But a
feeling of shame held me back。 I went up to him for an embrace； but he
gently pushed me away。
〃 'You are a man now； MY CHILD；' he said。 'What I have just done was a
very proper and simple thing； for which there is no need to thank me。
If I have any claim to your gratitude； Raphael；' he went on； in a kind
but dignified way； 'it is because I have preserved your youth from the
evils that destroy young men in Paris。 We will be two friends
henceforth。 In a year's time you will be a doctor of law。 Not without
some hardship and privations you have acquired the sound knowledge and
the love of； and application to； work that is indispensable to public
men。 You must learn to know me； Raphael。 I do not want to make either
an advocate or a notary of you； but a statesman； who shall be the
pride of our poor house。 。 。 。 Good…night；' he added。
〃From that day my father took me fully into confidence。 I was an only
son； and ten years before； I had lost my mother。 In time past my
father； the head of a historic family remembered even now in Auvergne；
had come to Paris to fight against his evil star； dissatisfied at the
prospect of tilling the soil； with his useless sword by his side。 He
was endowed with the shrewdness that gives the men of the south of
France a certain ascendency when energy goes with it。 Almost unaided；
he made a position for himself near the fountain of power。 The
revolution brought a reverse of fortune； but he had managed to marry
an heiress of good family； and； in the time of the Empire； appeared to
be on the point of restoring to our house its ancient splendor。
〃The Restoration； while it brought back considerable property to my
mother； was my father's ruin。 He had formerly purchased several
estates abroad； conferred by the Emperor on his generals； and now for
ten years he struggled with liquidators； diplomatists； and Prussian
and Bavarian courts of law； over the disputed possession of these
unfortunate endowments。 My father plunged me into the intricate
labyrinths of law proceedings on which our future depended。 We might
be compelled to return the rents； as well as the proceeds arising from
sales of timber made during the years 1814 to 1817； in that case my
mother's property would have barely saved our credit。 So it fell out
that the day on which my father in a fashion emancipated me； brought
me under a most galling yoke。 I entered on a conflict like a
battlefield； I must work day and night； seek interviews with
statesmen； surprise their convictions； try to interest them in our
affairs； and gain them over； with their wives and servants； and their
very dogs； and all this abominable business had to take the form of
pretty speeches and polite attentions。 Then I knew the mortifications
that had left their blighting traces on my father's face。 For about a
year I led outwardly the life of a man of the world； but enormous
labors lay beneath the surface of gadding about； and eager efforts to
attach myself to influential kinsmen； or to people likely to be useful
to us。 My relaxations were lawsuits； and memorials still furnished the
staple of my conversation。 Hitherto my life had been blameless； from
the sheer impossibility of indulging the desires of youth； but now I
became my own master； and in dread of involving us both in ruin by
some piece of negligence； I did not dare to allow myself any pleasure
or expenditure。
〃While we are young； and before the world has rubbed off the delicate
bloom from our sentiments； the freshness of our impressions； the noble
purity of conscience which will never allow us to palter with evil；
the sense of duty is very strong within us； the voice of honor clamors
within us； and we are open and straightforward。 At that time I was all
these things。 I wished to justify my father's confidence in me。 But
lately I would have stolen a paltry sum from him； with secret delight；
but now that I shared the burden of his affairs； of his name and of
his house； I would secretly have given up my fortune and my hopes for
him； as I was sacrificing my pleasures； and even have been glad of the
sacrifice！ So when M。 de Villele exhumed； for our special benefit； an
imperial decree concerning forfeitures； and had ruined us； I
authorized the sale of my property； only retaining an island in the
middle of the Loire where my mother was buried。 Perhaps arguments and
evasions； philosophical； philanthropic； and political considerations
would not fail me now； to h