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4 breaking dawn破晓-第23章

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opposite of helpful; but ready to try anything。 Edward seemed to notice nothing; as if I were wearing the 
same ratty old sweats I wore at home。 

The bruises were much better now—yellowing in some places and disappearing altogether in others—so 
tonight I pulled out one of the scarier pieces as I got ready in the paneled bathroom。 It was black; lacy; 
and embarrassing to look at even when it wasn't on。 I was careful not to look in the mirror before I went 
back to the bedroom。 I didn't want to lose my nerve。 

I had the satisfaction of watching his eyes pop open wide for just a second before he controlled his 
expression。 

〃What do you think?〃 I asked; pirouetting so that he could see every angle。 

He cleared his throat。 〃You look beautiful。 You always do。〃 

〃Thanks;〃 I said a bit sourly。 

I was too tired to resist climbing quickly into the soft bed。 He put his arms around me and pulled me 



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against his chest; but this was routine—it was too hot to sleep without his cool body close。 

〃I'll make you a deal;〃 I said sleepily。 

〃I will not make any deals with you;〃 he answered。 

〃You haven't even heard what I'm offering。〃 

〃It doesn't matter。〃 

I sighed。 〃Dang it。 And I really wanted。。。 Oh well。〃 

He rolled his eyes。 

I closed mine and let the bait sit there。 I yawned。 

It took only a minute—not long enough for me to zonk out。 

〃All right。 What is it you want?〃 

I gritted my teeth for a second; fighting a smile。 If there was one thing he couldn't resist; it was an 
opportunity to give me something。 

〃Well; I was thinking。。。 I know that the whole Dartmouth thing was just supposed to be a cover story; 
but honestly; one semester of college probably wouldn't kill me;〃 I said; echoing his words from long ago; 
when he'd tried to persuade me to put off becoming a vampire。 〃Charlie would get a thrill out of 
Dartmouth stories; I bet。 Sure; it might be embarrassing if I can't keep up with all the brainiacs。 Still。。。 
eighteen; nineteen。 It's really not such a big difference。 It's not like I'm going to get crow's feet in the next 
year。〃 

He was silent for a long moment。 Then; in a low voice; he said; 〃You would wait。 You would stay 
human。〃 

I held my tongue; letting the offer sink in。 

〃Why are you doing this to me?〃 he said through his teeth; his tone suddenly angry。 〃Isn't it hard enough 
without all of this?〃 He grabbed a handful of lace that was ruffled on my thigh。 For a moment; I thought 
he was going to rip it from the seam。 Then his hand relaxed。 〃It doesn't matter。 I won't make any deals 
with you。〃 

〃I want to goto college。〃 

〃No; you don't。 And there is nothing that is worth risking your life again。 That's worth hurting you。〃 

〃But I do want to go。 Well; it's not college as much as it's that I want—I want to be human a little while 
longer。〃 

He closed his eyes and exhaled through his nose。 〃You are making me insane; Bella。 Haven't we had this 
argument a million times; you always begging to be a vampire without delay?〃 

〃Yes; but。。。 well; I have a reason to be human that I didn't have before。〃 



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〃What's that?〃 

〃Guess;〃 I said; and I dragged myself off the pillows to kiss him。 

He kissed me back; but not in a way that made me think I was winning。 It was more like he was being 
careful not to hurt my feelings; he was completely; maddeningly in control of himself。 Gently; he pulled me 
away after a moment and cradled me against his chest。 

〃You are so human; Bella。 Ruled by your hormones。〃 He chuckled。 

〃That's the whole point; Edward。 I like this part of being human。 I don't want to give it up yet。 I don't 
want to wait through years of being a blood…crazed newborn for some part of this to come back to me。〃 

I yawned; and he smiled。 

〃You're tired。 Sleep; love。〃 He started humming the lullaby he'd composed for me when we first met。 

〃I wonder why I'm so tired;〃 I muttered sarcastically。 〃That couldn't be part of your scheme or anything。〃 

He just chuckled once and went back to humming。 

〃For as tired as I've been; you'd think I'd sleep better。〃 

The song broke off。 〃You've been sleeping like the dead; Bella。 You haven't said a word in your sleep 
since we got here。 If it weren't for the snoring; I'd worry you were slipping into a coma。〃 

I ignored the snoring jibe; I didn't snore。 〃I haven't been tossing? That's weird。 Usually I'm all over the 
bed when I'm having nightmares。 And shouting。〃 

〃You've been having nightmares?〃 

〃Vivid ones。 They make me so tired。〃 I yawned。 〃I can't believe I haven't been babbling about them all 
night。〃 

〃What are they about?〃 

〃Different things—but the same; you know; because of the colors。〃 

〃Colors?〃 

〃It's all so bright and real。 Usually; when I'm dreaming; I know that I am。 With these; I don't know I'm 
asleep。 It makes them scarier。〃 

He sounded disturbed when he spoke again。 〃What is frightening you?〃 

I shuddered slightly。 〃Mostly 。。。〃 I hesitated。 

〃Mostly?〃 he prompted。 

I wasn't sure why; but I didn't want to tell him about the child in my recurring nightmare; there was 



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something private about that particular horror。 So; instead of giving him the full description; I gave him 
just one element。 Certainly enough to frighten me or anyone else。 

〃The Volturi;〃 I whispered。 

He hugged me tighter。 〃They aren't going to bother us anymore。 You'll be immortal soon; and they'll have 
no reason。〃 

I let him comfort me; feeling a little guilty that he'd misunderstood。 The nightmares weren't like that; 
exactly。 It wasn't that I was afraid for myself—I was afraid for the boy。 

He wasn't the same boy as that first dream—the vampire child with the bloodred eyes who sat on a pile 
of dead people I loved。 This boy I'd dreamed of four times in the last week was definitely human; his 
cheeks were flushed and his wide eyes were a soft green。 But just like the other child; he shook with fear 
and desperation as the Volturi closed in on us。 

In this dream that was both new and old; I simply had to protect the unknown child。 There was no other 
option。 At the same time; I knew that I would fail。 

He saw the desolation on my face。 〃What can I do to help?〃 

I shook it off。 〃They're just dreams; Edward。〃 

〃Do you want me to sing to you? Ill sing all night if it will keep the bad dreams away。〃 

〃They're not all bad。 Some are nice。 So。。。 colorful。 Underwater; with the fish and the coral。 It all seems 
like it's really happening—I don't know that I'm dreaming。 Maybe this island is the p
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