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have left a child。 And you have never told me; though I have prayed so for a sign; waking or sleeping!〃
〃Nay;〃 said I; 〃I know nothing but what you tell me。 You say you heard of her marriage。〃
But she caught nothing of what I said。 She was praying to the Virgin in a kind of ecstasy; which seemed to render her unconscious of my very presence。
From Coldholme I went to Sir Philip Tempest's。 The wife of the foreign officer had been a cousin of his father's; and from him I thought I might gain some particulars as to the existence of the Count de la Tour d'Auvergne; and where I could find him; for I knew questions de vive voix aid the flagging recollection; and I was determined to lose no chance for want of trouble。 But Sir Philip had gone abroad; and it would be some time before I could receive an answer。 So I followed my uncle's advice; to whom I had mentioned how wearied I felt; both in body and mind; by my will…o'…the…wisp search。 He immediately told me to go to Harrogate; there to await Sir Philip's reply。 I should be near to one of the places connected with my search; Coldholme; not far from Sir Philip Tempest; in case he returned; and I wished to ask him any further questions; and; in conclusion; my uncle bade me try to forget all about my business for a time。
This was far easier said than done。 I have seen a child on a common blown along by a high wind; without power of standing still and resisting the tempestuous force。 I was somewhat in the same predicament as regarded my mental state。 Something resistless seemed to urge my thoughts on; through every possible course by which there was a chance of attaining to my object。 I did not see the sweeping moors when I walked out: when I held a book in my hand; and read the words; their sense did not penetrate to my brain。 If I slept; I went on with the same ideas; always flowing in the same direction。 This could not last long without having a bad effect on the body。 I had an illness; which; although I was racked with pain; was a positive relief to me; as it compelled me to live in the present suffering; and not in the visionary researches I had been continually making before。 My kind uncle came to nurse me; and after the immediate danger was over; my life seemed to slip away in delicious languor for two or three months。 I did not askso much did I dread falling into the old channel of thoughtwhether any reply had been received to my letter to Sir Philip。 I turned my whole imagination right away from all that subject。 My uncle remained with me until nigh midsummer; and then returned to his business in London; leaving me perfectly well; although not completely strong。 I was to follow him in a fortnight; when; as he said; 〃we would look over letters; and talk about several things。〃 I knew what this little speech alluded to; and shrank from the train of thought it suggested; which was so intimately connected with my first feelings of illness。 However; I had a fortnight more to roam on those invigorating Yorkshire moors。
In those days; there was one large; rambling inn; at Harrogate; close to the Medicinal Spring; but it was already becoming too small for the accommodation of the influx of visitors; and many lodged round about; in the farm…houses of the district。 It was so early in the season; that I had the inn pretty much to myself; and; indeed; felt rather like a visitor in a private house; so intimate had the landlord and landlady become with me during my long illness。 She would chide me for being out so late on the moors; or for having been too long without food; quite in a motherly way; while he consulted me about vintages and wines; and taught me many a Yorkshire wrinkle about horses。 In my walks I met other strangers from time to time。 Even before my uncle had left me; I had noticed; with half…torpid curiosity; a young lady of very striking appearance; who went about always accompanied by an elderly companion;hardly a gentlewoman; but with something in her look that prepossessed me in her favour。 The younger lady always put her veil down when any one approached; so it had been only once or twice; when I had come upon her at a sudden turn in the path; that I had even had a glimpse at her face。 I am not sure if it was beautiful; though in after…life I grew to think it so。 But it was at this time overshadowed by a sadness that never varied: a pale; quiet; resigned look of intense suffering; that irresistibly attracted me;not with love; but with a sense of infinite compassion for one so young yet so hopelessly unhappy。 The companion wore something of the same look: quiet melancholy; hopeless; yet resigned。 I asked my landlord who they were。 He said they were called Clarke; and wished to be considered as mother and daughter; but that; for his part; he did not believe that to be their right name; or that there was any such relationship between them。 They had been in the neighbourhood of Harrogate for some time; lodging in a remote farm…house。 The people there would tell nothing about them; saying that they paid handsomely; and never did any harm; so why should they be speaking of any strange things that might happen? That; as the landlord shrewdly observed; showed there was something out of the common way he had heard that the elderly woman was a cousin of the farmer's where they lodged; and so the regard existing between relations might help to keep them quiet。
〃What did he think; then; was the reason for their extreme seclusion?〃 asked I。
〃Nay; he could not tell;not he。 He had heard that the young lady; for all as quiet as she seemed; played strange pranks at times。〃 He shook his head when I asked him for more particulars; and refused to give them; which made me doubt if he knew any; for he was in general a talkative and communicative man。 In default of other interests; after my uncle left; I set myself to watch these two people。 I hovered about their walks drawn towards them with a strange fascination; which was not diminished by their evident annoyance at so frequently meeting me。 One day; I had the sudden good fortune to be at hand when they were alarmed by the attack of a bull; which; in those unenclosed grazing districts; was a particularly dangerous occurrence。 I have other and more important things to relate; than to tell of the accident which gave me an opportunity of rescuing them; it is enough to say; that this event was the beginning of an acquaintance; reluctantly acquiesced in by them; but eagerly prosecuted by me。 I can hardly tell when intense curiosity became merged in love; but in less than ten days after my uncle's departure I was passionately enamoured of Mistress Lucy; as her attendant called her; carefullyfor this I noted wellavoiding any address which appeared as if there was an equality of station between them。 I noticed also that Mrs。 Clarke; the elderly woman; after her first reluctance to allow me to pay them any attentions had been overcome; was cheered by my evident attachment to the young girl; it seemed to lighten her heavy burden of care; and she evidently favoured my visits to the farmhouse where they lodged。 It was not so with Lucy。 A more attractive person I never saw; in spite of her depress