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the poor clare-第14章

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pressure of so horrible a life; seemed over…passive to me。  She never complained。  Mrs。 Clarke complained more than ever。  As for me; I was more in love with the real Lucy than ever; but I shrunk from the false similitude with an intensity proportioned to my love。  I found out by instinct that Mrs。 Clarke had occasional temptations to leave Lucy。  The good lady's nerves were shaken; and; from what she said; I could almost have concluded that the object of the Double was to drive away from Lucy this last; and almost earliest friend。  At times; I could scarcely bear to own it; but I myself felt inclined to turn recreant; and I would accuse Lucy of being too patienttoo resigned。  One after another; she won the little children of Coldholme。  (Mrs。 Clarke and she had resolved to stay there; for was it not as good a place as any other; to such as they? and did not all our faint hopes rest on Bridgetnever seen or heard of now; but still we trusted to come back; or give some token?)  So; as I say; one after another; the little children came about my Lucy; won by her soft tones; and her gentle smiles; and kind actions。  Alas! one after another they fell away; and shrunk from her path with blanching terror; and we too surely guessed the reason why。  It was the last drop。  I could bear it no longer。  I resolved no more to linger around the spot; but to go back to my uncle; and among the learned divines of the city of London; seek for some power whereby to annul the curse。

My uncle; meanwhile; had obtained all the requisite testimonials relating to Lucy's descent and birth; from the Irish lawyers; and from Mr。 Gisborne。  The latter gentleman had written from abroad (he was again serving in the Austrian army); a letter alternately passionately self…reproachful and stoically repellant。  It was evident that when he thought of Maryher short lifehow he had wronged her; and of her violent death; he could hardly find words severe enough for his own conduct; and from this point of view; the curse that Bridget had laid upon him and his; was regarded by him as a prophetic doom; to the utterance of which she was moved by a Higher Power; working for the fulfilment of a deeper vengeance than for the death of the poor dog。  But then; again; when he came to speak of his daughter; the repugnance which the conduct of the demoniac creature had produced in his mind; was but ill…disguised under a show of profound indifference as to Lucy's fate。  One almost felt as if he would have been as content to put her out of existence; as he would have been to destroy some disgusting reptile that had invaded his chamber or his couch。

The great Fitzgerald property was Lucy's; and that was allwas nothing。

My uncle and I sat in the gloom of a London November evening; in our house in Ormond Street。  I was out of health; and felt as if I were in an inextricable coil of misery。  Lucy and I wrote to each other; but that was little; and we dared not see each other for dread of the fearful Third; who had more than once taken her place at our meetings。  My uncle had; on the day I speak of; bidden prayers to be put up on the ensuing Sabbath in many a church and meeting…house in London; for one grievously tormented by an evil spirit。  He had faith in prayersI had none; I was fast losing faith in all things。  So we sat; he trying to interest me in the old talk of other days; I oppressed by one thoughtwhen our old servant; Anthony; opened the door; and; without speaking; showed in a very gentlemanly and prepossessing man; who had something remarkable about his dress; betraying his profession to be that of the Roman Catholic priesthood。 He glanced at my uncle first; then at me。  It was to me he bowed。

〃I did not give my name;〃 said he; 〃because you would hardly have recognised it; unless; sir; when; in the north; you heard of Father Bernard; the chaplain at Stoney Hurst?〃

I remembered afterwards that I had heard of him; but at the time I had utterly forgotten it; so I professed myself a complete stranger to him; while my ever…hospitable uncle; although hating a papist as much as it was in his nature to hate anything; placed a chair for the visitor; and bade Anthony bring glasses; and a fresh jug of claret。

Father Bernard received this courtesy with the graceful ease and pleasant acknowledgement which belongs to a man of the world。  Then he turned to scan me with his keen glance。  After some alight conversation; entered into on his part; I am certain; with an intention of discovering on what terms of confidence I stood with my uncle; he paused; and said gravely …

〃I am sent here with a message to you; sir; from a woman to whom you have shown kindness; and who is one of my penitents; in Antwerpone Bridget Fitzgerald。〃

〃Bridget Fitzgerald!〃 exclaimed I。  〃In Antwerp?  Tell me; sir; all that you can about her。〃

〃There is much to be said;〃 he replied。  〃But may I inquire if this gentlemanif your uncle is acquainted with the particulars of which you and I stand informed?〃

〃All that I know; he knows;〃 said I; eagerly laying my hand on my uncle's arm; as he made a motion as if to quit the room。

〃Then I have to speak before two gentlemen who; however they may differ from me in faith; are yet fully impressed with the fact that there are evil powers going about continually to take cognizance of our evil thoughts:  and; if their Master gives them power; to bring them into overt action。  Such is my theory of the nature of that sin; which I dare not disbelieveas some sceptics would have us dothe sin of witchcraft。  Of this deadly sin; you and I are aware; Bridget Fitzgerald has been guilty。  Since you saw her last; many prayers have been offered in our churches; many masses sung; many penances undergone; in order that; if God and the holy saints so willed it; her sin might be blotted out。  But it has not been so willed。〃

〃Explain to me;〃 said I; 〃who you are; and how you come connected with Bridget。  Why is she at Antwerp?  I pray you; sir; tell me more。 If I am impatient; excuse me; I am ill and feverish; and in consequence bewildered。〃

There was something to me inexpressibly soothing in the tone of voice with which he began to narrate; as it were from the beginning; his acquaintance with Bridget。

〃I had known Mr。 and Mrs。 Starkey during their residence abroad; and so it fell out naturally that; when I came as chaplain to the Sherburnes at Stoney Hurst; our acquaintance was renewed; and thus I became the confessor of the whole family; isolated as they were from the offices of the Church; Sherburne being their nearest neighbour who professed the true faith。  Of course; you are aware that facts revealed in confession are sealed as in the grave; but I learnt enough of Bridget's character to be convinced that I had to do with no common woman; one powerful for good as for evil。  I believe that I was able to give her spiritual assistance from time to time; and that she looked upon me as a servant of that Holy Church; which has such wonderful power of moving men's hearts; and relieving them of the burden of their sins。  I have known her cross the moors on the wildest nights of storm; to confess and be absolved; and then she would return; calmed and subdued; to her d
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