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three men in a boat-第30章

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wants a little determination。〃



But I could not persuade them。



Rather an amusing thing happened while dressing that morning。  I was very 

cold when I got back into the boat; and; in my hurry to get my shirt on; 

I accidentally jerked it into the water。  It made me awfully wild; 

especially as George burst out laughing。  I could not see anything to 

laugh at; and I told George so; and he only laughed the more。  I never 

saw a man laugh so much。  I quite lost my temper with him at last; and I 

pointed out to him what a drivelling maniac of an imbecile idiot he was; 

but he only roared the louder。  And then; just as I was landing the 

shirt; I noticed that it was not my shirt at all; but George's; which I 

had mistaken for mine; whereupon the humour of the thing struck me for 

the first time; and I began to laugh。  And the more I looked from 

George's wet shirt to George; roaring with laughter; the more I was 

amused; and I laughed so much that I had to let the shirt fall back into 

the water again。



〃Ar'n't you … you … going to get it out?〃 said George; between his 

shrieks。



I could not answer him at all for a while; I was laughing so; but; at 

last; between my peals I managed to jerk out:



〃It isn't my shirt … it's YOURS!〃



I never saw a man's face change from lively to severe so suddenly in all 

my life before。



〃What!〃 he yelled; springing up。  〃You silly cuckoo!  Why can't you be 

more careful what you're doing?  Why the deuce don't you go and dress on 

the bank?  You're not fit to be in a boat; you're not。  Gimme the 

hitcher。〃



I tried to make him see the fun of the thing; but he could not。  George 

is very dense at seeing a joke sometimes。



Harris proposed that we should have scrambled eggs for breakfast。  He 

said he would cook them。  It seemed; from his account; that he was very 

good at doing scrambled eggs。  He often did them at picnics and when out 

on yachts。  He was quite famous for them。  People who had once tasted his 

scrambled eggs; so we gathered from his conversation; never cared for any 

other food afterwards; but pined away and died when they could not get 

them。



It made our mouths water to hear him talk about the things; and we handed 

him out the stove and the frying…pan and all the eggs that had not 

smashed and gone over everything in the hamper; and begged him to begin。



He had some trouble in breaking the eggs … or rather not so much trouble 

in breaking them exactly as in getting them into the frying…pan when 

broken; and keeping them off his trousers; and preventing them from 

running up his sleeve; but he fixed some half…a…dozen into the pan at 

last; and then squatted down by the side of the stove and chivied them 

about with a fork。



It seemed harassing work; so far as George and I could judge。  Whenever 

he went near the pan he burned himself; and then he would drop everything 

and dance round the stove; flicking his fingers about and cursing the 

things。  Indeed; every time George and I looked round at him he was sure 

to be performing this feat。  We thought at first that it was a necessary 

part of the culinary arrangements。



We did not know what scrambled eggs were; and we fancied that it must be 

some Red Indian or Sandwich Islands sort of dish that required dances and 

incantations for its proper cooking。  Montmorency went and put his nose 

over it once; and the fat spluttered up and scalded him; and then he 

began dancing and cursing。  Altogether it was one of the most interesting 

and exciting operations I have ever witnessed。  George and I were both 

quite sorry when it was over。



The result was not altogether the success that Harris had anticipated。  

There seemed so little to show for the business。  Six eggs had gone into 

the frying…pan; and all that came out was a teaspoonful of burnt and 

unappetizing looking mess。



Harris said it was the fault of the frying…pan; and thought it would have 

gone better if we had had a fish…kettle and a gas…stove; and we decided 

not to attempt the dish again until we had those aids to housekeeping by 

us。



The sun had got more powerful by the time we had finished breakfast; and 

the wind had dropped; and it was as lovely a morning as one could desire。  

Little was in sight to remind us of the nineteenth century; and; as we 

looked out upon the river in the morning sunlight; we could almost fancy 

that the centuries between us and that ever…to…be…famous June morning of 

1215 had been drawn aside; and that we; English yeomen's sons in homespun 

cloth; with dirk at belt; were waiting there to witness the writing of 

that stupendous page of history; the meaning whereof was to be translated 

to the common people some four hundred and odd years later by one Oliver 

Cromwell; who had deeply studied it。



It is a fine summer morning … sunny; soft; and still。  But through the 

air there runs a thrill of coming stir。  King John has slept at Duncroft 

Hall; and all the day before the little town of Staines has echoed to the 

clang of armed men; and the clatter of great horses over its rough 

stones; and the shouts of captains; and the grim oaths and surly jests of 

bearded bowmen; billmen; pikemen; and strange…speaking foreign spearmen。



Gay…cloaked companies of knights and squires have ridden in; all travel…

stained and dusty。  And all the evening long the timid townsmen's doors 

have had to be quick opened to let in rough groups of soldiers; for whom 

there must be found both board and lodging; and the best of both; or woe 

betide the house and all within; for the sword is judge and jury; 

plaintiff and executioner; in these tempestuous times; and pays for what 

it takes by sparing those from whom it takes it; if it pleases it to do 

so。



Round the camp…fire in the market…place gather still more of the Barons' 

troops; and eat and drink deep; and bellow forth roystering drinking 

songs; and gamble and quarrel as the evening grows and deepens into 

night。  The firelight sheds quaint shadows on their piled…up arms and on 

their uncouth forms。  The children of the town steal round to watch them; 

wondering; and brawny country wenches; laughing; draw near to bandy ale…

house jest and jibe with the swaggering troopers; so unlike the village 

swains; who; now despised; stand apart behind; with vacant grins upon 

their broad; peering faces。  And out from the fields around; glitter the 

faint lights of more distant camps; as here some great lord's followers 

lie mustered; and there false John's French mercenaries hover like 

crouching wolves without the town。



And so; with sentinel in each dark street; and twinkling watch…fires on 

each height around; the night has worn away; and over this fair valley of 

old Thame has broken the morning of the great day that is to close so big 

with the fate of ages yet unborn。



Ever since grey dawn; in the lower of the two islands; just above where 

we ar
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