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〃Wherever did you get that?〃 he gasped; no little surprised and agitated。
〃From your wife;〃 I answered; rapidly moving away。 〃Be sure to be here at eleven。〃
I slipped away into the crowd; and spent my hour and a half in persuading Rosalind that her husband was no doubt a little infatuated; but nevertheless the most faithful husband in the world。 If she would only leave all to me; by this time to…morrow night; if not a good many hours before; he should be in her arms as safe as in the Bank。 It did my heart good to see how happy this artistic adaptation of the truth made her; and I must say that she never had a wiser friend。
When eleven came; I was back in my seat at the Cafe du Ciel。 Orlando too was excitedly punctual。
〃Well; what is it?〃 he hurried out; almost before he had sat down。
〃What will you do me the honour of drinking?〃 I asked calmly。
〃Oh; drink be dd!〃 he said; 〃what have you to tell me?〃
〃I'm glad to hear you rap out such a good honest oath;〃 I said; 〃but I should like a drink; for all that; and if I may say so; you would be none the worse for a brandy and soda; late as it is。〃
When the drinks had come; I remarked to him quietly; but not without significance: 〃The meaning of this ring is that your wife is here; and very wretched。 By an accident I have been privileged with her friendship; and I may say; to save time; that she has told me the whole story。
〃What happily she has not been able to tell me; and what I need hardly say she will never know from me; I overheard; in the interests of your joint happiness; an hour or so ago。〃
The man who is telling the story has a proverbial great advantage; but I hope the reader knows enough of me by this to believe that I am far from meanly availing myself of it in this narrative。 I am well and gratefully aware that in this interview with Orlando my advantages were many and fortunate。 For example; had he been bigger and older; or had he not been a gentleman; my task had been considerably more arduous; not to say dangerous。
But; as Rosalind had said; he was really quite a boy; and I confess I was a little ashamed for him; and a little piqued; that he showed so little fight。 The unexpectedness of my attack had; I realised; given me the whip…hand。 So I judged; at all events; from the fact that he forbore to bluster; and sat quite still; with his head in his hands; saying never a word for what seemed several minutes。 Then presently he said very quietly;
〃I love my wife all the same。〃
〃Of course you do;〃 I answered; eagerly welcoming the significant announcement; 〃and if you'll allow me to say so; I think I understand more about the whole situation than either of you; bachelor though unfortunately I am。 As a famous friend of mine is fond of saying; lookers…on see most of the game。〃
Then I rapidly told him the history of my meeting with his wife; and depicted; in harrowing pigments of phrase; the distress of her mind。
〃I love my wife all the same;〃 he repeated; as I finished; 〃and;〃 he added; 〃I love Sylvia too。〃
〃But not quite in the same way?〃 I suggested。
〃I love Sylvia very tenderly;〃 he said。
〃Yes; I know; I don't think you could do anything else。 No man worth his salt could be anything but tender to a dainty little woman like that。 But tenderness; gentleness; affection; even self…sacrifice;these may be parts of love; but they are merely the crude untransformed ingredients of a love such as you feel for your wife; and such as I know she feels for you。〃
〃She still loves me; then;〃 he said pitifully; 〃she hasn't fallen in love with you。〃
〃No fear;〃 I answered; 〃no such luck for me。 If she had; I'm afraid I should hardly have been talking to you as I am at this moment。 If a woman like Rosalind; as I call her; gave me her love; it would take more than a husband to rob me of it; I can tell you。〃
〃Yes;〃 he repeated; 〃on my soul; I love her。 I have never been false to her; in my heart; but〃
〃I know all about it;〃 I said; 〃may I tell you how it all was;diagnose the situation?〃
〃Do;〃 he replied; 〃it is a relief to hear you talk。〃
〃Well;〃 I said; 〃may I ask one rather intimate question? Did you ever before you were married sow what are known as wild oats?〃
〃Never;〃 he answered indignantly; flashing for a moment。
〃Well; you should have done;〃 I said; 〃that's just the whole trouble。 Wild oats will get sown some time; and one of the arts of life is to sow them at the right time;the younger the better。 Think candidly before you answer me。〃
〃I believe you are right;〃 he replied; after a long pause。
〃You are a believer in theories;〃 I continued; 〃and so am I; but you can take my word that on these matters not all; but some; of the old theories are best。 One of them is that the man who does not sow his wild oats before marriage will sow them afterwards; with a whirlwind for the reaping。〃
Orlando looked up at me; haggard with confession。
〃You know the old story of the ring given to Venus? Well; it is the ruin of no few men to meet Venus for the first time on their marriage night。 Their very chastity; paradoxical as it may seem; is their destruction。 No one can appreciate the peace; the holy satisfaction of monogamy till he has passed through the wasting distractions; the unrest of polygamy。 Plunged right away into monogamy; man; unexperienced in his good fortune; hankers after polygamy; as the monotheistic Jew hankered after polytheism; and thus the monogamic young man too often meets Aphrodite for the first time; and makes future appointments with her; in the arms of his pure young wife。 If you have read Swedenborg; you will remember his denunciation of the lust of variety。 Now; that is a lust every young man feels; but it is one to be satisfied before marriage。 Sylvia Joy has been such a variant for you; and I'm afraid you're going to have some little trouble to get her off your nerves。 Tell me frankly;〃 I said; 〃have you had your fill of Aphrodite? It is no use your going back to your wife till you have had that。〃
〃I'm not quite a beast;〃 he retorted。 〃After all; it was an experiment we both agreed to try。〃
〃Certainly;〃 I answered; 〃and I hope it may have the result of persuading you of the unwisdom of experimenting with happiness。 You have the realities of happiness; why should you trouble about its theories? They are for unhappy people; like me; who must learn to distil by learned patience the aurum potabile from the husks of life; the peace which happier mortals find lying like manna each morn upon the meadows。〃
〃Well;〃 I continued; 〃enough of the abstract; let us have another drink; and tell me what you propose to do。〃
〃Poor Sylvia!〃 sighed Orlando。
〃Shall I tell you about Sylvia?〃 I said。 〃On second thoughts; I won't。 It would hardly be fair play; but this; I may say; relying on your honour; that if you were to come to my hotel; I could show you indisputable proof that I know at least as much about Sylvia Joy as even such a privileged intimate as yourself。〃
〃It is strange; then; that she never recognised you just now;〃 he retorted; with forlorn alertness。
〃Of course she didn't。 How young you are! It is rather too bad of a woman of Sylvia's experience