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THE BEDFORD…ROW CONSPIRACY
proved him to be a very worthy； easy； silly fellow。
〃Sir；〃 said Mr。 Perkins； 〃you have known for some time past the nature
of my political opinions； and the intimacy which I have had the honour to
form with onewith some of the leading members of the Liberal party。〃
（A grin from Mr。 Crampton。） 〃When first； by your kindness； I was
promised the clerkship in the Tape and Sealing…Wax Office； my opinions
were not formed as they are now； and having taken the advice of the
gentlemen with whom I act；〃（an enormous grin）〃the advice； I say； of
the gentlemen with whom I act； and the counsel likewise of my own
conscience； I am compelled； with the deepest grief； to say； my dear uncle；
that II〃
〃That youwhat； sir？〃 exclaimed little Mr。 Crampton； bouncing off his
chair。 〃You don't mean to say that you are such a fool as to decline the
place？〃
〃I do decline the place；〃 said Perkins； whose blood rose at the word
〃fool。〃 〃As a man of honour； I cannot take it。〃
〃Not take it！ and how are you to live？ On the rent of that house of
yours？ For； by gad； sir； if you give up the clerkship； I never will give you
a shilling。〃
〃It cannot be helped；〃 said Mr。 Perkins； looking as much like a martyr
as he possibly could； and thinking himself a very fine fellow。 〃I have
talents； sir； which I hope to cultivate； and am member of a profession by
which a man may hope to rise to the very highest offices of the State。〃
〃Profession； talents； offices of the State！ Are you mad； John Perkins；
that you come to me with such insufferable twaddle as this？ Why； do you
think if you HAD been capable of rising at the bar； I would have taken so
much trouble about getting you a place？ No； sir； you are too fond of
pleasure； and bed； and tea…parties； and small…talk； and reading novels； and
playing the flute； and writing sonnets。 You would no more rise at the bar
than my messenger； sir。 It was because I knew your dispositionthat
hopeless； careless； irresolute good…humour of yoursthat I had determined
to keep you out of danger； by placing you in a snug shelter； where the
storms of the world would not come near you。 You must have principles
forsooth！ and you must marry Miss Gorgon； of course： and by the time
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THE BEDFORD…ROW CONSPIRACY
you have gone ten circuits； and had six children； you will have eaten up
every shilling of your wife's fortune； and be as briefless as you are now。
Who the deuce has put all this nonsense into your head？ I think I know。〃
Mr。 Perkins's ears tingled as these hard words saluted them； and he
scarcely knew whether he ought to knock his uncle down； or fall at his feet
and say； 〃Uncle； I have been a； fool； and I know it。〃 The fact is； that in
his interview with Miss Gorgon and her aunt in the morning； when he
came to tell them of the resolution he had formed to give up the place；
both the ladies and John himself had agreed； with a thousand rapturous
tears and exclamations； that he was one of the noblest young men that ever
lived； had acted as became himself； and might with perfect propriety give
up the place； his talents being so prodigious that no power on earth could
hinder him from being Lord Chancellor。 Indeed； John and Lucy had
always thought the clerkship quite beneath him； and were not a little glad；
perhaps； at finding a pretext for decently refusing it。 But as Perkins was
a young gentleman whose candour was such that he was always swayed
by the opinions of the last speaker； he did begin to feel now the truth of his
uncle's statements； however disagreeable they might be。
Mr。 Crampton continued：
〃I think I know the cause of your patriotism。 Has not William Pitt
Scully； Esquire； had something to do with it？〃
Mr。 Perkins COULD not turn any redder than he was； but confessed
with deep humiliation that 〃he HAD consulted Mr。 Scully among other
friends。〃
Mr。 Crampton smileddrew a letter from a heap before him； and
tearing off the signature； handed over the document to his nephew。 It
contained the following paragraphs：
〃Hawksby has sounded Scully： we can have him any day we want
him。 He talks very big at present； and says he would not take anything
under a。 。 。 This is absurd。 He has a Yorkshire nephew coming up to
town； and wants a place for him。 There is one vacant in the Tape Office；
he says： have you not a promise of it？〃
〃I can'tI can't believe it；〃 said John； 〃this； sir； is some weak invention
of the enemy。 Scully is the most honourable man breathing。〃
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THE BEDFORD…ROW CONSPIRACY
〃Mr。 Scully is a gentleman in a very fair way to make a fortune；〃
answered Mr。 Crampton。 〃Look you； Johnit is just as well for your
sake that I should give you the news a few weeks before the papers； for I
don't want you to be ruined； if I can help it； as I don't wish to have you on
my hands。 We know all the particulars of Scully's history。 He was a
Tory attorney at Oldborough； he was jilted by the present Lady Gorgon；
turned Radical； and fought Sir George in his own borough。 Sir George
would have had the peerage he is dying for； had he not lost that second
seat （by…the…by； my Lady will be here in five minutes）； and Scully is now
quite firm there。 Well； my dear lad； we have bought your incorruptible
Scully。 Look here；〃and Mr。 Crampton produced three Morning Posts。
〃'THE HONOURABLE HENRY HAWKSBY'S DINNER…PARTY。
Lord So…and…SoDuke of So…and…SoW。 Pitt Scully； Esq。 M。P。'
〃Hawksby is our neutral； our dinner…giver。
〃'LADY DIANA DOLDRUM'S ROUT。W。 Pitt Scully； Esq；' again。
〃'THE EARL OF MANTRAP'S GRAND DINNER。'A Dukefour
Lords'Mr。 Scully； and Sir George Gorgon。'〃
〃Well； but I don't see how you have bought him； look at his votes。〃
〃My dear John；〃 said Mr。 Crampton； jingling his watch…seals very
complacently； 〃I am letting you into fearful secrets。 The great common
end of party is to buy yo