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strain。
I was awakened by Harold digging me in the ribs； and 〃She's going to…
day！〃 was the morning hymn that scattered the clouds of sleep。
Strange to say； it was with no corresponding jubilation of spirits that I
slowly realised the momentous fact。 Indeed； as I dressed； a dull
disagreeable feeling that I could not define grew within mesomething
like a physical bruise。 Harold was evidently feeling it too； for after
repeating 〃She's going to… day！〃 in a tone more befitting the Litany； he
looked hard in my face for direction as to how the situation was to be
taken。 But I crossly bade him look sharp and say his prayers and not
bother me。 What could this gloom portend； that on a day of days like the
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present seemed to hang my heavens with black？
Down at last and out in the sun； we found Edward before us； swinging
on a gate； and chanting a farm…yard ditty in which all the beasts appear in
due order； jargoning in their several tongues； and every verse begins with
the couplet
〃Now； my lads； come with me； Out in the morning early！〃
The fateful exodus of the day had evidently slipped his memory
entirely。 I touched him on the shoulder。 〃She's going to…day！〃 I said。
Edward's carol subsided like a water…tap turned off。 〃So she is！〃 he
replied； and got down at once off the gate： and we returned to the house
without another word。
At breakfast Miss Smedley behaved in a most mean and uncalled…for
manner。 The right divine of governesses to govern wrong includes no
right to cry。 In thus usurping the prerogative of their victims； they ignore
the rules of the ring； and hit below the belt。 Charlotte was crying； of
course； but that counted for nothing。 Charlotte even cried when the pigs'
noses were ringed in due season； thereby evoking the cheery contempt of
the operators； who asserted they liked it； and doubtless knew。 But when
the cloud…compeller； her bolts laid aside； resorted to tears； mutinous
humanity had a right to feel aggrieved； and placed in a false and difficult
position。 What would the Romans have done； supposing Hannibal had
cried？ History has not even considered the possibility。 Rules and
precedents should be strictly observed on both sides； when they are
violated； the other party is justified in feeling injured。
There were no lessons that morning； naturallyanother grievance！
The fitness of things required that we should have struggled to the last
in a confused medley of moods and tenses； and parted for ever； flushed
with hatred； over the dismembered corpse of the multiplication table。
But this thing was not to be； and I was free to stroll by myself through the
garden； and combat； as best I might； this growing feeling of depression。
It was a wrong system altogether； I thought； this going of people one had
got used to。 Things ought always to continue as they had been。 Change
there must be； of course； pigs； for instance； came and went with disturbing
frequency
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〃Fired their ringing shot and passed； Hotly charged and sank at
last；〃
but Nature had ordered it so； and in requital had provided for rapid
successors。 Did you come to love a pig； and he was taken from you；
grief was quickly assuaged in the delight of selection from the new litter。
But now； when it was no question of a peerless pig； but only of a
governess； Nature seemed helpless； and the future held no litter of
oblivion。 Things might be better； or they might be worse； but they would
never be the same； and the innate conservatism of youth asks neither
poverty nor riches； but only immunity from change。
Edward slouched up alongside of me presently； with a hang…dog look
on him； as if he had been caught stealing jam。 〃What a lark it'll be when
she's really gone！〃 he observed； with a swagger obviously assumed。
〃Grand fun！〃 I replied； dolorously； and conversation flagged。
We reached the hen…house； and contemplated the banner of freedom
lying ready to flaunt the breezes at the supreme moment。
〃Shall you run it up；〃 I asked； 〃when the fly starts； oror wait a little
till it's out of sight？〃
Edward gazed around him dubiously。 〃We're going to have some rain；
I think；〃 he said； 〃andand it's a new flag。 It would be a pity to spoil it。
P'raps I won't run it up at all。〃
Harold came round the corner like a bison pursued by Indians。 〃I've
polished up the cannons；〃 he cried； 〃and they look grand！ Mayn't I load
'em now？〃
〃You leave 'em alone；〃 said Edward； severely； 〃or you'll be blowing
yourself up〃 （consideration for others was not usually Edward's strong
point）。 〃Don't touch the gunpowder till you're told； or you'll get your
head smacked。〃
Harold fell behind； limp； squashed； obedient。 〃She wants me to write
to her；〃 he began； presently。 〃Says she doesn't mind the spelling； it I'll
only write。 Fancy her saying that！〃
〃Oh； shut up； will you？〃 said Edward； savagely； and once more we
were silent； with only our thoughts for sorry company。
〃Let's go off to the copse；〃 I suggested timidly； feeling that something
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had to be done to relieve the tension； 〃and cut more new bows and
arrows。〃
〃She gave me a knife my last birthday；〃 said Edward； moodily； never
budging。 〃It wasn't much of a knifebut I wish I hadn't lost it。〃
〃When my legs used to ache；〃 I said； 〃she sat up half the night；
rubbing stuff on them。 I forgot all about that till this morning。〃
〃There's the fly！〃 cried Harold suddenly。 〃I can hear it scrunching on
the gravel。〃
Then for the first time we turned and stared one another in the face。