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felt as though I were not a human being at all； but only some
negligible object such as a settee or window； or； if I were a
human being； as though I were quite indistinguishable from such a
negligible object。
〃Then you have not yet written to the Countess； my dear？〃 he said
to his wife in French； and with an imperturbable； yet determined；
expression on his countenance。
〃Good…bye； Monsieur Irtenieff；〃 Madame said to me； in her turn；
as she made a proud gesture with her head and looked at my
eyebrows just as her son had done。 I bowed to her； and again to
her husband； but my second salutation made no more impression
upon him than if a window had just been opened or closed。
Nevertheless the younger Iwin accompanied me to the door； and on
the way told me that he was to go to St。 Petersburg University；
since his father had been appointed to a post in that city （and
young Iwin named a very high office in the service）。
〃Well； his Papa may do whatsoever he likes；〃 I muttered to myself
as I climbed into the drozhki； 〃but at all events I will never
set foot in that house again。 His wife weeps and looks at me as
though I were the embodiment of woe； while that old pig of a
General does not even give me a bow。 However； I will get even
with him some day。〃 How I meant to do that I do not know； but my
words nevertheless came true。
Afterwards； I frequently found it necessary to remember the advice
of my father when he said that I must cultivate the
acquaintanceship of the Iwins； and not expect a man in the
position of General Iwin to pay any attention to a boy like
myself。 But I had figured in that position long enough。
XXI
PRINCE IVAN IVANOVITCH
〃Now for the last callthe visit to Nikitskaia Street；〃 I said
to Kuzma； and we started for Prince Ivan Ivanovitch's mansion。
Towards the end； a round of calls usually brings one a certain
amount of self…assurance： consequently I was approaching the
Prince's abode in quite a tranquil frame of mind； when suddenly I
remembered the Princess Kornakoff's words that I was his heir；
and at the same moment caught sight of two carriages waiting at
the portico。 Instantly； my former nervousness returned。
Both the old major…domo who opened the door to me； and the
footman who took my coat； and the two male and three female
visitors whom I found in the drawing…room； and； most of all；
Prince Ivan Ivanovitch himself （whom I found clad in a 〃company〃
frockcoat and seated on a sofa） seemed to look at me as at an
HEIR； and so to eye me with ill…will。 Yet the Prince was very
gracious and； after kissing me （that is to say； after pressing
his cold； dry； flabby lips to my cheek for a second）； asked me
about my plans and pursuits； jested with me； inquired whether I
still wrote verses of the kind which I used to indite in honour
of my grandmother's birthdays； and invited me to dine with him
that day。 Nevertheless； in proportion as he grew the kinder； the
more did I feel persuaded that his civility was only intended to
conceal from me the fact that he disliked the idea of my being
his heir。 He had a custom （due to his false teeth； of which his
mouth possessed a complete set） of raising his upper lip a little
as he spoke； and producing a slight whistling sound from it； and
whenever； on the present occasion； he did so it seemed to me that
he was saying to himself： 〃A boy； a boyI know it！ And my heir；
toomy heir！〃
When we were children； we had been used to calling the Prince
〃dear Uncle；〃 but now； in my capacity of heir； I could not bring
my tongue to the phrase； while to say 〃Your Highness；〃 as did one
of the other visitors； seemed derogatory to my self…esteem。
Consequently； never once during that visit did I call him anything
at all。 The personage； however； who most disturbed me was the old
Princess who shared with me the position of prospective
inheritor； and who lived in the Prince's house。 While seated
beside her at dinner； I felt firmly persuaded that the reason why
she would not speak to me was that she disliked me for being her
co…heir； and that the Prince； for his part； paid no attention to
our side of the table for the reason that the Princess and myself
hoped to succeed him； and so were alike distasteful in his sight。
〃You cannot think how I hated it all！〃 I said to Dimitrieff the
same evening； in a desire to make a parade of disliking the
notion of being an heir （somehow I thought it the thing to do）。
〃You cannot think how I loathed the whole two hours that I spent
there！Yet he is a fine…looking old fellow； and was very kind to
me；〃 I addedwishing； among other things； to disabuse my friend
of any possible idea that my loathing had arisen out of the fact
that I had felt so small。 〃It is only the idea that people may be
classing me with the Princess who lives with him； and who licks
the dust off his boots。 He is a wonderful old man； and good and
considerate to everybody； but it is awful to see how he treats
the Princess。 Money is a detestable thing； and ruins all human
relations。
〃Do you know； I think it would be far the best thing for me to
have an open explanation with the Prince；〃 I went on； 〃to tell
him that I respect him as a man； but think nothing of being his
heir； and that I desire him to leave me nothing； since that is
the only condition on which I can； in future； visit his house。〃
Instead of bursting out laughing when I said this； Dimitri
pondered awhile in silence； and then answered：
〃You are wrong。 Either you ought to refrain from supposing that
people may be classing you with this Princess of whom you speak；
or； if you DO suppose such a thing； you ought to suppose further
that people are thinking what you yourself know quite well
namely； that such thoughts are so utterly foreign to your nature
that you despise them and would never make them a basis for
action。 Suppose； however； that people DO suppose you to suppose
such a thingWell； to sum up；〃 he added； feeling that he was
getting a little mixed in his pronouncements； 〃you had much
better not suppose anything of the kind。〃
My friend was perfectly right； though it was not until long； long
afterwards that experience of life taught me the evil that comes
of thinkingstill worse； of sayingmuch that seems very fine；
taught me that there are certain thoughts which should always be
kept to oneself； since brave words seldom go with brave deeds。 I
learnt then that the mere fact of giving utterance to a good
intention often makes it difficult； nay； impossible； to carry
that good intention into effect。 Yet how is one to refrain from
giving utterance to the brave； self…sufficient impulses of youth？
Only long afterwards does one remember and regret them； even as
one incontinently plucks a flower before its blooming； and
subsequently finds it lying crushed and withered on the ground。
The very next morning I； who had just been telling my friend
Dimitri that money corrupts all h