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Both： Sweet and low； etc。
（Exit Zara。 Enter King dressed as Field…Marshal。）
King： To a Monarch who has been accustomed to the uncontrolled
use
of his limbs； the costume of a British Field…Marshal is；
perhaps； at first； a little cramping。 Are you sure that
this is all right？ It's not a practical joke； is it？ No
one has a keener sense of humor than I have； but the
First
Statutory Cabinet Council of Utopia Limited must be
conduct…
ed with dignity and impressiveness。 Now； where are the
other five who signed the Articles of Association？
Fitz。： Sir； they are here。
（Enter Lord Dramaleigh； Captain Corcoran； Sir Bailey Barre； Mr。
Blushington； and
Mr。 Goldbury from different entrances。）
King： Oh！ （Addressing them） Gentlemen； our daughter holds her
first Drawing…Room in half an hour； and we shall have
time
to make our half…yearly report in the interval。 I am
neces…
sarily unfamiliar with the forms of an English Cabinet
Councilperhaps the Lord Chamberlain will kindly put us
in
the way of doing the thing properly； and with due regard
to
the solemnity of the occasion。
Lord D。： Certainlynothing simpler。 Kindly bring your chairs
forwardHis Majesty will； of course； preside。
（They range their chairs across stage like Christy Minstrels。 King
sits center； Lord Dramaleigh on his left； Mr。 Goldbury on his
right；
Captain Corcoran left of Lord Dramaleigh； Captain
Fitzbattleaxe right of
Mr。 Goldbury； Mr。 Blushington extreme right； Sir Bailey Barre
extreme
left。）
King： Like this？
Lord D。： Like this。
King： We take your word for it that this is all right。 You are
not making fun of us？ This is in accordance with the
prac…
tice at the Court of St。 James's？
Lord D。： Well； it is in accordance with the practice at the Court
of
St。 James's Hall。
King： Oh！ it seems odd； but never mind。
SONG King。
Society has quite forsaken all her wicked courses。
Which empties our police courts； and abolishes divorces。
Chorus： Divorce is nearly obsolete in England。
King： No tolerance we show to undeserving rank and splendour；
For the higher his position is； the greater the offender。
Chorus： That's maxim that is prevalent in England。
King： No peeress at our drawing…room before the Presence passes
Who wouldn't be accepted by the lower middle…classes。
Each shady dame； whatever be her rank； is bowed out
neatly。
Chorus： In short； this happy country has been Anglicized
completely
Is really is surprising
What a thorough Anglicizing
We have brought aboutUtopia's quite another land；
In her enterprising movements；
She is Englandwith improvements；
Which we dutifully offer to our mother…land！
King： Our city we have beautifiedwe've done it willy…nilly
And all that isn't Belgrave Square is Strand and
Piccadilly。
Chorus： We haven't any slummeries in England！
King： The chamberlain our native stage has purged beyond a
ques…
tion。
Of 〃risky〃 situation and indelicate suggestion；
No piece is tolerated if it's costumed indiscreetly
Chorus： In short this happy country has been Anglicized com…
pletely！
It really is surprising； etc。
King： Our peerage we've remodelled on an intellectual basis；
Which certainly is rough on our hereditary races
Chorus： We are going to remodel it in England。
King： The Brewers and the Cotton Lords no longer seek
admission；
And literary merit meets with proper recognition
Chorus： As literary merit does in England！
King： Who knows but we may count among our intellectual
chickens
Like you； an Earl of Thackery and p'r'aps a Duke of
Dickens
Lord Fildes and Viscount Millais （when they come） we'll
welcome sweetly
Chorus： In short； this happy country has been Anglicized
completely！
It really is surprising； etc。
（At the end all rise and replace their chairs。）
King： Now； then for our first Drawing…Room。 Where are the
Prin…
cesses？ What an extraordinary thing it is that since
Euro…
pean looking…glasses have been supplied to the Royal bed…
rooms my daughters are invariably late！
Lord D。： Sir； their Royal Highnesses await your pleasure in the
Ante…room。
King： Oh。 Then request them to do us the favor to enter at
once。
（Enter all the Royal Household； including （besides the Lord
Chamber…
lain） the Vice…Chamberlain； the Master of the Horse； the
Master
of the Buckhounds； the Lord High Treasurer； the Lord Steward；
the
Comptroller of the Household； the Lord…in…Waiting； the Field
Officer in Brigade Waiting； the Gold and Silver Stick； and the
Gentlemen Ushers。 Then enter the three Princesses （their
trains
carried by Pages of Honor）； Lady Sophy； and the
Ladies…in…Waiting。）
King： My daughters； we are about to attempt a very solemn
ceremo…
nial； so no giggling； if you please。 Now； my Lord
Chamber…
lain； we are ready。
Lord D。： Then； ladies and gentlemen； places； if you please。 His
Maj…
esty will take his place in front of the throne； and will
be
so obliging as to embrace all the debutantes。 （LADY
SOPHY
much shocked。）
King： Whatmust I really？
Lord D。： Absolutely indispensable。
King： More jam for the Palace Peeper！
（The King takes his place in front of the throne； the Princess Zara
on
his left； the two younger Princesses on the left of Zara。）
King： Now； is every one in his place？
Lord D。： Every one is in his place。
King： Then let the revels commence。
（Enter the ladies attending the Drawing…Room。 They give their
cards
to the Groom…in…Waiting； who passes them to the
Lord…in…Waiting；
who passes them to the Vice…Chamberlain； who passes them to
the
Lord Chamberlain； who reads the names to the King as each lady
approaches。 The ladies curtsey in succession to the King and
the
three Princesses； and pass out。 When all the presentations
have
been accomplished； the King； Princesses； and Lady Sophy come
forward； and all the ladies re…enter。）
RECITATIVE King
This ceremonial our wish displays
To copy all Great Britain's courtly way