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lin mclean-第50章

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word about handing some dish fell from one or other of them; but nothing

more; until Lusk took out his watch and mentioned the hour。



〃Yu've not ate especially hearty;〃 said Lin; resting his arms upon the

table。



〃I'm going;〃 asserted Lusk。 〃Governor Barker may start out。 I've got my

interests to look after。〃



〃Why; sure;〃 said Lin。 〃I can't hope you'll waste all your time on just

me。〃



Lusk rose and looked at his wife。 〃It'll be ten now before we get to

Drybone;〃 said he。 And he went down to the stable。



The woman sat still; pressing the crumbs of her bread。 〃I know you seen

me;〃 she said; without looking at him。



〃Saw you when?〃



〃I knowed it。 And I seen how you looked at me。〃 She sat twisting and

pressing the crumb。 Sometimes it was round; sometimes it was a cube; now

and then she flattened it to a disk。 Mr。 McLean seemed to have nothing

that he wished to reply。



〃If you claim that pistol is yourn;〃 she said next; 〃I'll tell you I know

better。 If you ask me whose should it be if not yourn; I would not have

to guess the name。 She has talked to me; and me to her。〃



She was still looking away from him at the bread…crumb; or she could have

seen that McLean's hand was trembling as he watched her leaning on his

arms。



〃Oh yes; she was willing to talk to me!〃 The woman uttered another sudden

laugh。 〃I knowed about herall。 Things get heard of in this world。 Did

not all about you and me come to her knowledge in its own good time; and

it done and gone how many years? My; my; my!〃 Her voice grew slow and

absent。 She stopped for a moment; and then more rapidly resumed: 〃It had

travelled around about you and her like it always will travel。 It was

known how you had asked her; and how she had told you she would have you;

and then told you she would not when she learned about you and me。 Folks

that knowed yus and folks that never seen yus in their lives had to have

their word about her facing you down you had another wife; though she

knowed the truth about me being married to Lusk and him livin' the day

you married me; and ten and twenty marriages could not have tied you and

me up; no matter how honest you swore to no hinderance。 Folks said it was

plain she did not want yus。 It give me a queer feelin' to see that girl。

It give me a wish to tell her to her face that she did not love yus and

did not know love。 Waitwait; Lin! Yu' never hit me yet。〃



〃No;〃 said the cow…puncher。 〃Nor now。 I'm not Lusk。〃



〃Yu' looked soso bad; Lin。 I never seen yu' look so bad in old days。

Wait; now; and I must tell it。 I wished to laugh in her face and say;

'What do you know about love?' So I walked in。 Lin; she does love yus!〃



〃Yes;〃 breathed McLean。



〃She was sittin' back in her room at Separ。 Not the ticket…office; but〃



〃I know;〃 the cow…puncher said。 His eyes were burning。



〃It's snug; the way she has it。 'Good…afternoon;' I says。 'Is this Miss

Jessamine Buckner?'〃



At his sweetheart's name the glow in Lin's eyes seemed to quiver to a

flash。



〃And she spoke pleasant to mepleasant and gay…like。 But a woman can

tell sorrow in a woman's eyes。 And she asked me would I rest in her room

there; and what was my name。 'They tell me you claim to know it better

than I do;' I says。 'They tell me you say it is Mrs。 McLean。' She put her

hand on her breast; and she keeps lookin' at me without never speaking。

'Maybe I am not so welcome now;' I says。 'One minute;' says she。 'Let me

get used to it。' And she sat down。



〃Lin; she is a square…lookin' girl。 I'll say that for her。



〃I never thought to sit down onced myself; I don't know why; but I kep'

a…standing; and I took in that room of hers。 She had flowers and things

around there; and I seen your picture standing on the table; and I seen

your six…shooter right by itand; oh; Lin; hadn't I knowed your face

before ever she did; and that gun you used to let me shoot on Bear Creek?

It took me that sudden! Why; it rushed over me so I spoke right out

different from what I'd meant and what I had ready fixed up to say。



〃'Why did you do it?' I says to her; while she was a…sitting。 'How could

you act so; and you a woman?' She just sat; and her sad eyes made me

madder at the idea of her。 'You have had real sorrow;' says I; 'if they

report correct。 You have knowed your share of death; and misery; and hard

work; and all。 Great God! ain't there things enough that come to yus

uncalled for and natural; but you must run around huntin' up more that

was leavin' yus alone and givin' yus a chance? I knowed him onced。 I

knowed your Lin McLean。 And when that was over; I knowed for the first

time how men can be different。' I'm started; Lin; I'm started。 Leave me

go on; and when I'm through I'll quit。 'Some of 'em; anyway;' I says to

her; 'has hearts and self…respect; and ain't hogs clean through。'



〃'I know;〃 she says; thoughtful…like。



〃And at her whispering that way I gets madder。



〃'You know!' I says then。 'What is it that you know? Do you know that you

have hurt a good man's heart? For onced I hurt it myself; though

different。 And hurts in them kind of hearts stays。 Some hearts is that

luscious and pasty you can stab 'em and it closes up so yu'd never

suspicion the placebut Lin McLean! Nor yet don't yus believe his is the

kind that breaksif any kind does that。 You may sit till the gray

hairs; and you may wall up your womanhood; but if a man has got manhood

like him; he will never sit till the gray hairs。 Grief over losin' the

best will not stop him from searchin' for a second best after a while。 He

wants a home; and he has got a right to one;' says I to Miss Jessamine。

'You have not walled up Lin McLean;' I says to her。 Wait; Lin; wait。 Yus

needn't to tell me that's a lie。 I know a man thinks he's walled up for a

while。〃



〃She could have told you it was a lie;〃 said the cow…puncher。



〃She did not。 'Let him get a home;' says she。 'I want him to be happy。'

'That flash in your eyes talks different;' says I。 'Sure enough yus wants

him to be happy。 Sure enough。 But not happy along with Miss Second Best。'



〃Lin; she looked at me that piercin'!



〃And I goes on; for I was wound away up。 'And he will be happy; too;' I

says。 'Miss Second Best will have a talk with him about your picture and

little 〃Neighbor;〃 which he'll not send back to yus; because the hurt in

his heart is there。 And he will keep 'em out of sight somewheres after

his talk with Miss Second Best。' Lin; Lin; I laughed at them words of

mine; but I was that wound up I was strange to myself。 And she watchin'

me that way! And I says to her: 'Miss Second Best will not be the crazy

thing to think I am any wife of his standing in her way。 He will tell her

about me。 He will tell how onced he thought he was solid married to me

till Lusk came back; and she will drop me out of sight along with the

rest that went nameless。 They was not uncomprehensible to you; was they?

You have learned something by li
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