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mamma were very estimable people and would in the course of time
receive Heavenly Mansions in which they would be exceedingly
comfortable； so doubtless would her sisters； so perhaps； even might
her brothers； but for herself she felt that a higher destiny was
preparing； which it was her duty never to lose sight of。 The first
step towards it would be her marriage with Theobald。 In spite；
however； of these flights of religious romanticism； Christina was a
good…tempered kindly…natured girl enough； who； if she had married a
sensible laymanwe will say a hotel…keeperwould have developed
into a good landlady and been deservedly popular with her guests。
Such was Theobald's engaged life。 Many a little present passed
between the pair； and many a small surprise did they prepare
pleasantly for one another。 They never quarrelled； and neither of
them ever flirted with anyone else。 Mrs Allaby and his future
sisters…in…law idolised Theobald in spite of its being impossible to
get another deacon to come and be played for as long as Theobald was
able to help Mr Allaby； which now of course he did free gratis and
for nothing； two of the sisters； however； did manage to find
husbands before Christina was actually married； and on each occasion
Theobald played the part of decoy elephant。 In the end only two out
of the seven daughters remained single。
After three or four years； old Mr Pontifex became accustomed to his
son's engagement and looked upon it as among the things which had
now a prescriptive right to toleration。 In the spring of 1831； more
than five years after Theobald had first walked over to Crampsford；
one of the best livings in the gift of the College unexpectedly fell
vacant； and was for various reasons declined by the two fellows
senior to Theobald； who might each have been expected to take it。
The living was then offered to and of course accepted by Theobald；
being in value not less than 500 pounds a year with a suitable house
and garden。 Old Mr Pontifex then came down more handsomely than was
expected and settled 10；000 pounds on his son and daughter…in…law
for life with remainder to such of their issue as they might
appoint。 In the month of July； 1831 Theobald and Christina became
man and wife。
CHAPTER XIII
A due number of old shoes had been thrown at the carriage in which
the happy pair departed from the Rectory； and it had turned the
corner at the bottom of the village。 It could then be seen for two
or three hundred yards creeping past a fir coppice； and after this
was lost to view。
〃John；〃 said Mr Allaby to his man…servant； 〃shut the gate；〃 and he
went indoors with a sigh of relief which seemed to say： 〃I have
done it； and I am alive。〃 This was the reaction after a burst of
enthusiastic merriment during which the old gentleman had run twenty
yards after the carriage to fling a slipper at itwhich he had duly
flung。
But what were the feelings of Theobald and Christina when the
village was passed and they were rolling quietly by the fir
plantation？ It is at this point that even the stoutest heart must
fail； unless it beat in the breast of one who is over head and ears
in love。 If a young man is in a small boat on a choppy sea； along
with his affianced bride and both are sea…sick； and if the sick
swain can forget his own anguish in the happiness of holding the
fair one's head when she is at her worstthen he is in love； and
his heart will be in no danger of failing him as he passes his fir
plantation。 Other people； and unfortunately by far the greater
number of those who get married must be classed among the 〃other
people；〃 will inevitably go through a quarter or half an hour of
greater or less badness as the case may be。 Taking numbers into
account； I should think more mental suffering had been undergone in
the streets leading from St George's； Hanover Square； than in the
condemned cells of Newgate。 There is no time at which what the
Italians call la figlia della Morte lays her cold hand upon a man
more awfully than during the first half hour that he is alone with a
woman whom he has married but never genuinely loved。
Death's daughter did not spare Theobald。 He had behaved very well
hitherto。 When Christina had offered to let him go； he had stuck to
his post with a magnanimity on which he had plumed himself ever
since。 From that time forward he had said to himself： 〃I； at any
rate； am the very soul of honour； I am not；〃 etc。； etc。 True； at
the moment of magnanimity the actual cash payment； so to speak； was
still distant； when his father gave formal consent to his marriage
things began to look more serious； when the college living had
fallen vacant and been accepted they looked more serious still； but
when Christina actually named the day； then Theobald's heart fainted
within him。
The engagement had gone on so long that he had got into a groove；
and the prospect of change was disconcerting。 Christina and he had
got on； he thought to himself； very nicely for a great number of
years； whywhywhy should they not continue to go on as they were
doing now for the rest of their lives？ But there was no more chance
of escape for him than for the sheep which is being driven to the
butcher's back premises； and like the sheep he felt that there was
nothing to be gained by resistance； so he made none。 He behaved； in
fact； with decency； and was declared on all hands to be one of the
happiest men imaginable。
Now； however； to change the metaphor； the drop had actually fallen；
and the poor wretch was hanging in mid air along with the creature
of his affections。 This creature was now thirty…three years old；
and looked it： she had been weeping； and her eyes and nose were
reddish； if 〃I have done it and I am alive；〃 was written on Mr
Allaby's face after he had thrown the shoe； 〃I have done it； and I
do not see how I can possibly live much longer〃 was upon the face of
Theobald as he was being driven along by the fir Plantation。 This；
however； was not apparent at the Rectory。 All that could be seen
there was the bobbing up and down of the postilion's head； which
just over…topped the hedge by the road…side as he rose in his
stirrups； and the black and yellow body of the carriage。
For some time the pair said nothing： what they must have felt
during their first half hour； the reader must guess； for it is
beyond my power to tell him； at the end of that time； however；
Theobald had rummaged up a conclusion from some odd corner of his
soul to the effect that now he and Christina were married the sooner
they fell into their future mutual relations the better。 If people
who are in a difficulty will only do the first little reasonable
thing which they can clearly recognise as reasonable； they will
always find the next step more easy both to see and take。 What；
then； thought Theobald； was here at this moment the first and most
obvious matter to be considered； and what would be an equitable view
of his and Christina's relative positions in respect to it？ Clearly
their first dinner was their first joint entry into the duties and
pleasures of married life。 No less clearly it was Christina's duty
to order